The Way I Was
by othfan326
Summary: AU. After a family tragedy, Brooke finds solace in her old summer home in Tree Hill, North Carolina. There, she finds Lucas Scott and some old friends that might be just what she needs to heal and find the person she used to be. BL. Brooke Centric.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi!**

**This story is AU, BL, but Brooke-centric.**

**After a family tragedy, Brooke finds solace in her old summer home in Tree Hill, North Carolina. There, she finds Lucas Scott and some old friends that might be just what she needs to heal and find the person she used to be.**

**Disclaimer: Clearly I don't own OTH. If I did, why would I be writing on this site? The only thing I own here is the plot.**

**Enjoy **

* * *

Driving. It was a simple task really, especially for Brooke Davis. She had gotten her full license just under three months ago on her 17th birthday, and she was already an excellent driver. But driving skills had nothing to do with why she couldn't put the key in the ignition, press her foot to the gas, and drive away.

And then someone knocked on the window.

Brooke jumped in her seat, her heart rate skyrocketed, and she let out a small yelp as she was broken out of her thoughts. She quickly turned her head and saw her best friend Rachel standing outside her car so she unbuckled her seatbelt and stepped out, closed the door and leaned back on the car.

"Hey," Rachel said softly.

"Hey," Brooke tried to smile. She failed again. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you still be drunk from last night?"

"Well after you left the party, Adam asked if you were going to be at the one tomorrow night, and I think that's when it hit me that you were really leaving. So here I am, at six in the morning, slightly hung over, just to see you off."

"Thanks," Brooke answered simply. There was a sincerity to her voice, but not much else emotion.

"Are you sure you have to do this?" Rachel asked one last time.

"I can't be here anymore; you and I both know that. I'll be back at the end of the summer, but right now, if I want to be able to breath, I have to leave that house," Brooke said, glancing for a millisecond at the large apartment building behind her.

"But you're going to North Carolina!" Rachel pleaded with Brooke to try to stay. "This is your home."

"Not really," Brooke looked down as she spoke. "That might be my house, but it's not my home right now. My home is supposed to be a place of comfort, not a place where I'm haunted by memories and scared to say the wrong thing."

While Brooke spoke with a certain coldness, Rachel felt the beginning of tears begin to sting her eyes. The Davis home was always a welcome one. She and Brooke were best friends and even their parents were now best friends. The house was always full of life and comfort. Until two months ago.

"Rach," Brooke sighed. "I'll be back. I just need to get away. If I don't now I might lose myself completely."

Rachel nodded, and squinted slightly as the rising sun began to reflect across the window shield of the car.

"You're still coming down to visit, right?" Brooke asked with a hint of hope in her voice.

"Absolutely. July 4th, right?" Rachel confirmed.

"Yeah……Rach?"  
"Yeah?"

"You know that even though I'm leaving, I'm still here if you need anything."

"See," Rachel said with a wide smile. "You haven't changed that much. You still want to give everything you can to your friends."

Brooke nodded slightly.

"I know you're still…here, even if you're not physically here," Rachel said. "But if _you_ need anything. Call me immediately. I'll send you down a package, or I'll come down or whatever you want."

"You mean another package as in another couple trays of food from your mom?" Brooke asked, trying to laugh a little as she looked at the box of prepared food in the front seat.

"Something like that."

Brooke nodded. "Look, I uh, I should get on the road now, but uh…"

"This isn't goodbye," Rachel shook her head. "Last night might have been a summer goodbye for you and everyone else, but I'm not saying goodbye. I'll talk to you tonight and I'll see you soon," Rachel said with confidence.

Brooke nodded, froze for a second, and then launched herself into Rachel's arms.

"I'm gonna miss you," Brooke let a single tear fall as she spoke into Rachel's embrace.

"I'm gonna miss you too, bitch," Rachel said softly. "But like you said, this is what's best for you."

Brooke nodded and pulled away.

She stopped for a moment, gave Rachel one last hug before getting in the car and starting it. With one last glance to Rachel and then to her building, Brooke slowly pulled out of the parking space and began her drive.

Ten and half hours and she'd be in Tree Hill, North Carolina.

"Dude, seriously, you're mom makes the best food, _ever_," Nathan told Lucas as they walked out of Karen's Café and toward Nathan's car.

"I know."

"It's a wonder that you've stayed as skinny as you are with the way she feeds you."

Lucas laughed. "I know," he repeated.

"But," Nathan said with a small sigh. "Now we have to go home and face Daddy Dearest."

And with that, Lucas felt like he just got punched in the stomach. Like all everything that had been great that day was just taken from him and now all he felt was tired. Tired of the way his father treated him, tired of basketball being life or death, tired of having to lead two lives and please everyone around him.

He was tired of becoming a person who he didn't want to be.

"You okay?" Lucas snapped back to reality at his brother's words.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," Lucas waved it off.

"You sure? Cause it looked like we lost you there for a minute," Nathan said, trying not to laugh at Lucas.

"Shut up man, just get in the car and let's go," Lucas playfully pushed Nathan towards the car.

They got in and Nathan started the engine. Lucas took one last glance at his mother's café. In 10 minutes he'd be at his father's house.

Brooke Davis felt guilty for leaving for many reasons. One was that she left before her parents had even woken up. Probably not the best thing for her to do, but Brooke needed a totally clean break from her family, or at least what was left of it. She knew that her parents probably needed her now, but if they really did, they made no effort to give a sign of this. In fact, no one really talked about anything anymore in her home. Nothing was important anymore.

She had been driving for almost 13 hours now and she was exhausted. With the exception of bathroom breaks and refilling the gas tank, she hadn't stopped since she pulled away from her Park Avenue apartment building, left Manhattan, left New York, and headed down the coast to her old summer home. Her legs and back were stiff, she was pretty sure that her butt was numb, and her eyes were tired from staring at the long road ahead of her, but she couldn't stop. If she did, the guilt would set in again and she would turn around and head home.

It was a little late to turn back now. Her plans were past set; they were definite. Her parents thought she was spending a week at a friend's country house before heading to the six week summer program that she was supposed to attend. What her parents didn't know was that 10 days ago she wrote an extensive letter to the director of the program explaining why she wouldn't be able to attend the program. Four days later she received a call from said director who told her how impressed he was with her maturity in the situation and that it would be noted later on, which Brooke correctly took as a euphemism for it won't affect your chances at getting into the college that the program was held at.

College. The word made her sick at this point. Brooke went to a private school in New York; one of the best high schools in the county, and probably one of the most expensive. College was always a topic there. Her school sent a staggering percentage of graduates to the Ivy League each year, and that dreaded C-word was always a topic. Especially in her house. Brooke was already expected to attend the university where she was a triple legacy (from her parents and older brother), where she was expected to graduate with honors just like the rest of her family. Mind you, this is the same college whose selective summer program she just skipped out on.

Brooke sighed deeply as she past the sign that said 'Welcome to Tree Hill'.

"Finally," she muttered to herself.

Now that she had arrived in Tree Hill she could finally forget about school for a while. A task that was near impossible for Brooke. Her mother had always put pressure on her to do well, but in the past months, the pressure had increased enormously. Actually, Brooke's doing well in school was all that seemed to matter to her mother regarding her only daughter.

Brooke shook the thoughts of school and her mother from her head.

"Not here, not now," Brooke muttered to herself. This was a vacation, an escape, a self imposed exile; a cowardly and rash decision to leave her home in search for peace. This search did not need to be impeded by the subjects that drove her crazy at home.

Brooke breathed a sigh of relief as she pulled up the driveway to the large house with the famous red door. For a millisecond a hint of a smile graced Brooke's face as the memories began flood her mind.

She used to spend her summer's here. It was her grandmother's house and every summer Brooke, her brother Matthew, and her two cousins, Greg and Laura would travel all the way down to North Carolina to spend two months with their favorite grandmother. Some of Brooke's favorite memories took place in that house. The house she hadn't been to since two summers ago.

Things just got too busy. Some were heading off to college, other had jobs, and Brooke, the youngest of them all, just found that the life she was growing into didn't have time to go down to visit her grandma.

That was one of the biggest mistakes that all four of them had ever made, because at the beginning of the next summer (last summer), Sophia Davis passed away, leaving the house and a large sum of money to share between her four grandchildren. But no one visited the house that summer. No one had the heart to now that their grandma was no longer a presence in the house. They all paid their respects at the funeral in New York and paid someone to clean the food and other perishable items from the house, but no one visited.

Brooke turned off the engine and stepped out of the car, bringing with her a small overnight bag and the food from Rachel's mother. Rachel's mother didn't actually know what Brooke was doing, but she had some extra food from a big family dinner so she happily handed it off to Brooke, knowing that she and her parents weren't exactly concerned with proper meals at the moment.

When she had her bag and box of food in her arms, she took one last look at the car. It was still packed full of luggage that she would unpack the next morning, but that's not why she was looking at it.

It was still weird that she was driving his car. In Brooke's mind she should still be begging to use her father's Mercedes until her parents bought a new car for her on her 18th birthday next year. She wasn't supposed to be driving the car that her parents bought for her brother a few years ago. Matt was still supposed to be driving it, swatting at her hands when she tried to change the radio station and yelling at the bad New York drivers as he impatiently drove through the city.

Brooke sighed once again and turned to the house. She didn't want to have to think of Matthew Robert Davis right now. Granted that's what this trip was about, but she didn't want to have to cry herself to sleep tonight.

Brooke dug through her bag for the old key and nervously opened the door. She breathed out in relief when she was able to turn the lights on when she got inside. Last week she had made a few phone calls to turn on the electricity, water, and have the pool and house cleaned out before she arrived. Thankfully, the tasks had actually been accomplished.

She put the food away in the kitchen and rested her overnight bag on the kitchen counter. Exiting through the back door of the kitchen and into the cool windy air, she stepped off the back porch and walked along the stone path, almost covered by overgrown grass, toward the pool which she was pleased to see had been cleaned out and refilled. She stopped at the edge of the pool. Normally she would sit down at the edge and put her feet in the water, but at the moment, she couldn't bare the thought of breaking the peaceful surface.

She looked out over the pool and could practically see her, Matt, Greg, and Laura playing chicken in the pool. The last time they played like that, Brooke was 15, Laura was 16, Greg was 19, and Matt was 22. She looked over to the hot tub attached to the far end of the pool where she and Laura, who was more like her sister than her cousin, would spend hours talking about anything and everything. Then she looked at the two big hammocks that rest between two trees about 20 yards from the pool. She remembered the summer evenings when the four would stretch out together on the hammocks reading and just basking in the warm summer glow. Brooke used to love to read; get lost in a book and forget about the rest of the world for a while, but now that she thought about it, she hadn't read a decent book that wasn't for school in a long time. Probably since the last time she had been here.

Reading more was just one of the things that Brooke added to her mental to-do list as she turned and headed back inside, grabbed her overnight bag and decided to take a look around the inside of the house.

As she walked through the house, she admired her late grandmother's taste. She headed up the stairs and stopped at the point in the hallway where there were two doors opposite each other. She knew that to her left, she would find the burgundy colored walls of her and Laura's room, and to her right she would find the navy blue walls of Matt and Greg's room. She glanced in both, noticing how they hadn't changed since she last saw them. Then she passed the other two guest rooms before finally arriving at the master bedroom.

When she opened the door, she was fairly surprised not to see the room decorated as she remembered it to be. Instead, her grandmother's old possessions had been replaced by a more modern décor with items that hadn't looked like they had been used yet. Brooke then vaguely remembered her grandmother explaining that she had redone the master bedroom and moved into the guest room so that when she was gone Brooke could stay in the master bedroom. Brooke told her she was thinking morbidly, but she insisted that she was thinking realistically.

Something caught Brooke's eye as she scanned the room; it was the thick manila envelope that lay on the edge of the kind size bed.

* * *

Lucas sighed as he flopped onto his bed in Dan's house. This would always be Dan's house to him; never his home. His home was the room he had back at his mother's house. It was the room with his pictures, posters, and favorite books; it was the place where he always felt safe. His room in Dan's house was just a reminder of how screwed up his life was.

Dan hadn't spoken a word to him until he was 15. Dan had left him and his mom, Karen when she found out she was pregnant, leaving them for Deb and Nathan. Even if Dan became the best father in the world, Lucas would never forgive him for that.

It wasn't until Dan decided to run for mayor of their little town that he even acknowledged Lucas, and then it was only because he needed to look like the perfect family for his campaign image.

With Dan's sickening luck, during Lucas and Nathan's sophomore year, Karen's café had a few slow months. Money became tight, and that gave Dan the perfect opportunity to win a judge over in a custody agreement (Lucas was convinced it also involved bribery, but he could never prove it). By finals of that year, Lucas began living in Dan's house part time. That summer, Dan sent him and Nathan to High Flyers in Florida. By Election Day in November of this year, their junior year, Lucas was only at his mother's house every other weekend.

Lucas hated living this life. He hated Dan's smug and manipulative nature and the fact that he could never be who he wanted while he was still in Dan's grasp. He and Nathan were miserable.

As if on cue, Lucas heard the usual two knocks on the door. He lifted his head just in time to see the door swing open, revealing Nathan leaning against the door jamb.

Lucas somehow managed to push himself up and lean against his head board as Nathan took a seat in his desk chair.

"Dude," Nathan started, shaking his head. "I ate _way_ too much."

"You and me both," Lucas agreed.

They were both more than thankful that Dan often worked late nights, because it allowed the bothers to eat dinner at the café with Karen and Deb. Their mothers had become friends much to everyone's shock, joking that they found their first common ground in their hatred for Dan, something that their relationship had in common with their sons'.

When Dan first began petitioning for joint custody of Lucas, Nathan made it his personal mission to make 'the other son's' life miserable. Lucas remembered that it wasn't until they were literally about to kill each other that Lucas finally defended himself and ended their longstanding rivalry.

"_You don't have the right to hate me!" Lucas yelled at Nathan as they both practically tried to strangle each other. Nathan didn't respond verbally, but rather pushed harder into Lucas, trying to get him to release his own grip and give up. "I should be the one hating you!" Lucas screamed in Nathan's face, and then with a burst of energy pushed him off and into the wall behind him. _

_They were panting now, standing a few feet away from each other and staring directly into each other's eyes. _

"_Dan left us for__you__," Lucas said slowly and sternly. "You grew up with everything you could have ever wanted. You grew up with a father. I should hate you for getting that. You can't hate me for something he did before you even existed."_

_Nathan stayed silent. Lucas couldn't tell if he was trying to think of something to say or if he was just being stubborn and not trying to help the situation._

"_Look, I don't want this, okay?" Lucas continued. "I just want the life I've always known, but he's got some sort of ridiculous power in this town that allows him get away with anything he wants, and right now, he wants to make us both miserable by doing this."  
"So what are we supposed to do?" Nathan finally asked._

"_We're supposed to be brothers despite all of the crap that Dan has put us through, and if you hate him as much as I do, maybe together we could…."_

"_Beat him?" Nathan suggested._

"_Yeah."_

_Nathan stayed silent for what seemed like hours; debating his answer in his head._

"_Okay," He finally agreed, and then surprised them both as he held out a hand to Lucas to shake. Tentatively but gladly, Lucas shook it._

From there they slowly became friends, but it wasn't until High Flyers that summer that they really bonded and became brothers.

There were others that helped them along the way, but for the most part, it was Lucas and Nathan against Dan and the world.

"You okay man?" Nathan asked.

"What?" Lucas snapped his head back to Nathan.

"You were doing that thing were you stare off into the distance and do whatever it is that you do."

"Right," Lucas laughed a little. "Just thinking."

"Whatever, man," Nathan said as he stood up. "Just get some sleep now, you look like shit."

And with that Nathan was gone, into his own room, leaving Lucas alone with his thoughts again.

He probably did look like shit, but that was just because he was exhausted. He was stressed and worn out and just tired. He didn't know how much longer he could do it; living what seemed like three different lives and trying to meet the expectations of each one.

Lucas reached over to his nightstand and grabbed the small white remote. Within seconds the music was blasting through his radio.

_I watched the proverbial sunrise  
Coming up over the Pacific and  
You might think I'm losing my mind,  
But I will shy away from the specifics..._

_'cause I don't want you to know where I am  
'cause then you'll see my heart  
In the saddest state it's ever been._

_This is no place to try and live my life._

_Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it.  
See that line. Well I never should have crossed it.  
Stop right there. Well I never should have said  
That it's the very moment that  
I wish that I could take back._

_I'm sorry for the person I became.  
I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change.  
I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again  
'cause who I am hates who I've been.  
Who I am hates who I've been._

* * *

Brooke fingered the smooth envelope in her hands. On one side of it were the names of the four grandchildren in Sophia Davis' loopy handwriting.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Brooke carefully opened the envelope and slid out its contents. Four smaller envelopes and a neatly folded stray piece of paper came out.

Sophia Davis had been more of an older wise friend in her grandchildren's lives than the overbearing and old fashioned matriarch that most people had expected her to be. Curious of her last words, Brooke unfolded the paper and began to read.

"_My dearest babies," the letter began. "If you are reading this than that means that I have passed on, to put it lightly. I hope this letter doesn't 'creep you out' as you would say, but it is the best way for me to tell you some very important things. I have left you all a large sum of money that I don't want touched until you turn 18, but more importantly, I have left this house for the four of you to share. Some of my fondest memories of you all are in this house, and I hope that my death will at the very least bring you back here together. I want to make it clear that I do no resent you at all for not visiting recently. I understand that as you enter your young adulthood, priorities change, but my sincerest hope is that this house will offer a place of retreat and comfort in your futures. Enclosed are four more personal notes that I have for you…."_

As hard as Brooke fought, she couldn't stop one salty tear from falling. She quickly wiped it away, willing herself not to cry on her first night alone.

That was going to be hard with the rate that the guilt was sinking in at.

Trying to shake away the pit in her stomach, Brooke sifted through the letters to find the one with her name on it. With more anticipation this time, Brooke quickly opened the letter.

"_My Dearest Brookie, I hope that as you read this, you are reminded of the good memories that we have shared in this house, and more than that, I hope that there will be more memories for you to make in this house. You brought a light to this house that no one could match. You always seemed to be the life of the party; always happy and you always knew how to make everyone have some fun. Not only does your happiness affect those around you, but the way you care for the people you love at such a young age astounds me. I hope the years of high school and life don't wear those traits down, because that is what makes you, you. That is what makes you the Brooke Davis I know and love; the girl with the cutest dimples and the smile that could warm anyone's heart. Never forget the times we spent here and how much I love you. Goodbye my baby girl, Grandma."_

This time Brooke smiled through her tears; resolving to fulfill her grandmother's wishes this summer by becoming the girl she once was.

At home she hid herself and her emotions. Originally it had just been because she was a closed off person, but lately it was because she didn't want to have to put more on her parents. They had been through enough already and Brooke thought it was selfish to make them deal with her problems too.

That was going to change. This summer Brooke was going to change into the person who she once was; the person who she wants to be.

At least, that's what she keeps telling herself.

The road would be long and hard, and she didn't know if she would be finding herself alone, or if there would be someone there to help her along the way. What she did know though, was that in the end, Brooke was going to at least start to heal from the year she had been put through; from the tragedy that she had been put through.

I talk to absolutely no one.  
Couldn't keep to myself enough.  
And the things bottled inside have finally begun  
To create so much pressure that I'll soon blow up.

I heard the reverberating footsteps  
Synching up to the beating of my heart,  
And I was positive that unless I got myself together,  
I would watch me fall apart.

And I can't let that happen again  
'cause then you'll see my heart  
In the saddest state it's ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

Who I am hates who I've been  
And who I am will take the second chance you gave me.  
Who I am hates who I've been  
'cause who I've been only ever made me...

So sorry for the person I became.  
So sorry that it took so long for me to change.  
I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again  
'cause who I am hates who I've been.  
Who I am hates who I've been.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review.**

**-OTHfan326 **


	2. The First Meeting

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks soooooo much for the incredible reviews you all left for the fist chapter. Especially **CheeryFan, TypoKween, LoVeBrucas, greekcat92, Brucas2006,tripnfallbri, flipflopgal, toddntan, **and an unbelievably huge shout out and thank you to **ariadnescurse

**Disclaimer: Clearly I don't own OTH. If I did, why would I be writing on this site? The only thing I own here is the plot.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

She hated crying. It wasn't that she saw it as a sign of weakness, but rather she hated how it made her feel physically. It was the puffy and sore eyes, the headache, and feeling utterly exhausted afterwards.

She had cried so much the first week after it had happened that Rachel would have to force her to drink bottle after bottle of water just to stay hydrated. But then she just stopped. Not because she didn't want to cry anymore, but because she _couldn't _cry anymore. It had been exactly a week after the big 'incident'; Brooke was so tired that she just couldn't cry anymore. So she decided that she wouldn't cry anymore even if she could. And since then, she had suppressed the tears so many times that it was like she didn't know how to cry anymore. Until a week ago when she decided she needed to leave. That's when she started crying again.

And that's why she cried herself to sleep last night. She didn't want to. Crying alone in the big empty and dark house was definitely not what she wanted, but it happened anyway.

She missed him, true, but this time her crying was mostly because of her guilt.

Guilt from not visiting her grandmother's house, guilt for leaving her parents when they needed her, guilt from being so selfish that she cut off almost all ties and left her life behind her for the summer.

But now Brooke Davis was sitting on the porch steps of what was now _her_ house. She used to do this back in New York; she would sit on the front steps of the long walkway that led to the lobby of her building, or if the weather was just right, she would travel to the roof of her 30-story building and look out over the city. She found being able to watch over everything else calming. She would just sit on those steps and work out whatever problems she was having in her head, and she would watch the people pass by as they walked their dogs or shouted into their cell phones, and she would even watch absentmindedly as the cabs sped by her.

She loved the noise and bustling of the city. Now, sitting out on an eerily quiet morning in Tree Hill, North Carolina, she thought she might go stir-crazy before the summer was even over. She wanted quiet; but this was a little too much.

Then she heard the rhythmic beat of sneakers on the pavement.

* * *

Lucas watched the pavement five feet in front of him as kept a strong pace turning the corner onto the long block ahead of him. This was his last stretch, until of course he turned around and ran back to his house in time to take a shower and get to school on time.

He was listening to the beat of his feat on the concrete below him. Lucas loved his music and almost always listened to it while he ran, but today the tiny ipod shuffle that he used for running was resting in the pocket of his track pants. Today the sounds coming from the earphones just clouded his mind and he couldn't concentrate. That didn't happen often; music always calmed him, but on some days, the days when he felt particularly lost, the silence of the town around him was what calmed him.

When he was staying at his father's house he always took the same running route; the one where the halfway mark was the huge house at the end of the block with the impossibly vibrant red door.

He often wondered what was held behind that door. But he figured he'd never find out, because in the year that he had been running by that house, he had never seen a single sign of life…until now.

"What the hell…" Lucas trailed off as he approached the house, shocked to see a girl – gorgeous girl might he add – sitting on the porch and a car in the driveway.

"Can I help you?" Brooke questioned a little coldly as she was freaked out and annoyed that some guy had been staring at her for a few seconds.

"Oh, yeah," Lucas said, shaking his head and inwardly cursing himself for being an idiot. "Sorry," he said as he tentatively walked up the walkway to the porch, stopping about 10 feet in front of the mystery girl before him.

"Uh," Lucas started again. "Who are you?"

"Uh," Brooke imitated him. "This is my house."

"What?"

Brooke rolled her eyes. She considered going 'bitchy Brooke' on him, but then realized that he was the first person she had talked to since she had gotten here so she decided to hold the bitch in for a little longer.

"It's just that I run by this house all the time and I've never seen anyone here."

"Oh," Brooke said, understanding what he meant. "It was my grandmother's house, but no one's lived here for a really long time."

Lucas nodded; his unconscious shifting on his feet moved him two feet closer to her.

"So who are you?" Brooke asked.

Lucas looked up, surprised that she was continuing the conversation.

"Lucas," he answer politely, leaving out his last name in hopes that maybe someone in this town would know him as something other than Dan Scott's other son.

"Brooke," she countered and Lucas nodded with a slight smile.

"So if no one's lived here for a while, why are you here?" Lucas asked.

"I'm staying here for the summer. I got here last night."

Now Lucas was interested.

"So you got here last night, and you're up at 6:30 in the morning?" Lucas asked curiously.

"I couldn't sleep," Brooke shrugged as she spoke. Okay, she was definitely interested in this guy; she only used the shrug if she was interested.

"Me either," Lucas agreed truthfully.

"Um, do you want to sit?" Brooke asked, finally noticing that he was still a little out of breath. She didn't know why she asked him. Granted he was tired, but she had barely met the guy and she was already offering the seat next to her on the porch steps.

"Thanks," Lucas said gratefully as he took a seat next to her but with just enough space between them. As he sat, he felt the lead that seemed to be in his legs fade away, and he was instantly grateful for her polite offer.

Lucas was definitely intrigued by Brooke. Maybe it was the mystery of her arrival, or maybe it was that every time he looked her in the eye he could swear he saw something more in there that she was just itching to let to the world. Whatever it was, she had him captivated and he had known her for what? Thirty seconds?

"Do you always do that hard of a run in the mornings?" Brooke asked. She liked to run as well, but she rarely did it early in the morning.

"No, it would exhaust me for school, but sometimes when I can't sleep, like today, I just get up and run and it helps me clear my head."

Brooke nodded understandingly.

"What year are you?" Brooke asked, hoping that maybe if she found someone her age she wouldn't have to spend the _whole_ summer alone.

"Junior, you?" Lucas asked.

"Just finished my junior year too," Brooke smiled, thankful that the atrocity that was junior year, was now over.

"Finished?" Lucas asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, my school finishes the first week of June."

"God I'm jealous," Lucas said. "I finish at the end of next week."

"Sorry," Brooke offered.

"Damn you're lucky."

Brooke chuckled a little but agreed.

"What school do you go to anyway?" Lucas asked, wondering if maybe she was from a nearby town.

"I go to a private school in New York City."

"Oh," Lucas raised his eyebrows; that wasn't what he was expecting. "So what are you doing in Tree Hill?"

"I just needed to get away," Brooke said softly.

"Cryptic, but I'll take it," Lucas said. "Did you come alone?"

"Is that your way of asking if I have a boyfriend?" Brooke asked, titling her head to the side a little.

Lucas chuckled a little. "No, I was just wondering if you came down with a bunch of friends or your family or something."

"Oh, no, no it's just me."

"Okay, so what do you plan on doing here for an entire summer if you're here alone?"

"You ask a lot of questions, don't you?" Brooke asked.

"Not usually, but you have me curious."

"You have me curious too."

"Me?" Lucas asked surprised. "I'm not the one who showed up in a random town overnight. Why am I interesting?"

"Because you're fighting yourself."

"Wha…" Lucas was definitely intrigued by her now. "What makes you say that?" he asked, not telling her that she was dead on right.

"You say you run to work out your problems, which means that you have a lot on your mind right now. You don't really tell people about your problems, which is why you keep asking me questions to avoid talking about yourself. Clearly, you're hiding something from some one somewhere," Brooke told him pointedly, shocking him with her observation.

"How do you know that?" Lucas asked of her last comment.

"Cause I'm doing the same thing," Brooke admitted quietly.

Lucas stared at her intently. He was shocked, amazed, and definitely attracted.

Lucas was about to speak again when high pitched beeping interrupted him.

"What's that?" Brooke asked, finding her voice again.

"Just my watch telling me it's time to head back home so I can get ready for school and stuff."

"Oh."

"Yeah," Lucas said. "Um, this might sound weird, but maybe if…well you don't really know anyone…so…"

"I'll be around, I'll find you," Brooke said, trying not to laugh at his nervousness. He probably didn't have to instigate with girls too much; his good looks probably earned him a lot of girls that threw themselves at him, allowing him to avoid this awkward part.

Lucas nodded and felt his cheeks flush slightly in embarrassments.

"It was nice meeting you, Brooke," Lucas said sincerely before giving her a half smile, standing up from his seat on the steps and resuming his run.

Brooke watched as Lucas jogged back down the street, not taking her eyes off of him until he turned the corner.

But then he was gone and Brooke was left alone with her thoughts and the memories that haunted her.

Brooke looked down to where Lucas had just been sitting next to her and noticed something sitting innocently on the porch.

She picked up the small silver ipod shuffle and realized that it must have slipped out of his pocket when he sat down.

She flipped it over and saw "L.E.S" inscribed on the back.

Brooke sighed and stood. She went back into the house and put the ipod down on the kitchen counter. She could deal with that later; right now she had other things to get done.

* * *

"Okay man, what is going on?" Nathan asked Lucas as they sat down at their usually table in the quad in the front of the school.

"What do you mean?" Lucas asked.

"I know you went on one of those weird runs this morning, but that usually clears your mind, but now you haven't been concentrating on anything."

"It's nothing," Lucas waved it off. Lucas was never a good liar. Today was no exception. Nathan knew he was lying, but he didn't know that it was Brooke that he was thinking about.

"What's nothing?" Haley asked as she, Peyton, and Jake joined them at the table.

"Luke's hiding something," Nathan told them.

"I'm not hiding anything!" Lucas exclaimed, but froze when his mind drifted back to when Brooke told him he was hiding something. He couldn't help the smile that crossed his lips and it didn't go unnoticed by everyone else at the table.

"Can we just talk about something else?" Lucas asked.

"Sure…what?" Nathan countered.

Lucas rolled his eyes and went back into another one of his Brooke induced trances as everyone else started up a conversation.

This was seriously not good, he thought to himself. He wasn't able to concentrate for the first half of the day, and he knew that the second half wouldn't get any better.

Trying not to think about Brooke anymore, Lucas began to look around him. He smiled slightly when he saw Peyton and Jake picking off of each other's lunch trays. They really were a cute couple. Peyton was like his little sister now, and the fact that they ever thought that something more could be between them kinda grossed him out. Then he saw Nathan and Haley in some intense discussion. It was clear that they liked each other –they had for a long time –but neither ever acted on it. Lucas didn't understand why, but he had long since given up on trying to get them to admit that there were feelings there.

His eyes drifted across the quad and that's when it caught his eye. Normally students weren't allowed off campus, so when the silver sports car pulled up it was quick to catch his eye. That, and the fact that he instantly recognized it as the car that had been in the driveway that morning.

"Luke?" Haley questioned, noticing her friend staring at a car.

"Lucas?" Jake questioned this time.

"Yeah?" Lucas snapped his head back to attention. "I'll be right back," he told them before quickly getting up and then calmly and coolly walking over to the car.

As he approached it he found himself shockingly happy that it was in fact Brooke. The passenger side window rolled down and Lucas rested his arms against it, leaning in slightly to get a better look at the brunette who looked incredible in Lucas' opinion.

"Hi," Lucas said.

"Hi back atcha," Brooke smiled genuinely. For a second she froze, not really believing that she was actually smiling, not really believing that a guy she just met that morning could actually make her happy for a few seconds instead of mulling over the people who weren't there with her anymore.

Lucas reached into the car and picked his ipod up off of the passenger seat.

"I was looking for this," Lucas said relieved and flattered that she took the time to find him and give it back to him.

"Yeah, well besides the fact that you're a 17 year old guy named Lucas, I don't know much about you, so I figured the school was a good place to start looking."

"Well I have to disagree."

"That this wasn't a good place to look?"

"No," Lucas smiled. "That you don't know much about me, 'cause we talked for barely five minutes this morning, and you assessed stuff about me that my closest friends don't know."

"I guess I'm just great like that," Brooke smiled.

"I guess so," Lucas said, getting lost for a moment in her eyes and her smile.

There was silence for a bit as they gazed at each other; both not knowing exactly what else to say.

"So uh, what did you do today?" Lucas asked, trying to start the conversation up again but also genuinely interested in what she found to do in the little town.

"Just some errands I guess. I needed groceries and the essentials."

"And for the rest of the day?"  
"I'll probably go for a run and then some other stuff, you know I was right about you?" Brooke changed the subject quickly.

"What do you mean?"

"You do ask a lot of questions," Brooke said matter-of-factly. "I'll see you around Lucas."

"I'll see you around, Brooke," Lucas responded as he took a step back from the car and let her drive away.

Lucas watched the car drive away and then reluctantly headed back to his table where he knew his inquisitive friends were waiting.

"Nothing my ass," Nathan muttered as Lucas sat back down.  
"What the hell was that?" Peyton asked.

"And if you say nothing I'll actually hurt you for lying to us again," Haley added.

"It's just someone I met this morning, I dropped my ipod, she was giving it back to me," Lucas tried to shake off the questioning stares.

"Riiight," Jake said sarcastically. "That's all it was."

"Exactly," Lucas smiled arrogantly.

Haley was about to question him again when they heard the bell ring.

"Whaddya know? Saved by the bell!" Lucas said giddily as he grabbed his backpack and headed inside before anyone else could ask him a question.

The truth was that he wouldn't know how to answer the question. Not only did he not know what Brooke was to him, but he barely knew Brooke.

Although, he thought, he kinda wanted to change that last part.

* * *

Lucas took a much needed seat at the counter in his mom's café. With finals less than two weeks away, it was all that people seemed to be talking about. Granted TTH wasn't exactly an academic boot camp, but with college looming in the future, grades suddenly became important again.

"Long day?" Karen asked as she approached Lucas from the other side of the counter.

"Time seemed to stand still," Lucas grumbled.

"You're just excited for the summer."

"Yeah, I guess," Lucas said. The truth was that he couldn't stop thinking about Brooke, and the prospect of seeing the mysterious brunette again made classes seem ten times longer than they usually were.

"So should I expect you and Nathan for dinner tonight?" Karen asked as she wiped down the counter now that the after school rush was finally over.

"Um, actually," Lucas began. "I was hoping to get dinner to go."

"Go where?" Karen asked. Although she wasn't able to give him any weeknight rules now that he was staying with Dan, she was still able to impose some motherly morals on him every so often.

"To a friends," Lucas said, hesitating at the word friend.

"You don't sound so sure."

"Is Lucas talking about that mystery person you were talking to at lunch today?" Nathan asked as he sat down on the stool next to Lucas and Haley went behind the counter to start working.

"Mystery person?" Karen asked.

"She's –"

"Wait, she?" Nathan asked.

"She's here fo--," Lucas cut himself off. "You know what? I don't have to explain anything to you," Lucas told Nathan. "Mom, it's not a big deal, can I just get some dinner to go?"

"Alright," Karen said. "But I expect an explanation sometime," she added before walking away.

"Fine," Lucas sighed.

"Do you actually like this girl?" Nathan asked once Karen was gone.

"What are you talking about? I barely know her," Lucas said.

"That doesn't matter," Nathan pointed out and Lucas looked away. "You do!"

"Shut up man," Lucas shook his head.

"Whatever, I think this is good for you," Nathan said. "You were slipping into a dangerous pattern for a while. This girl might be exactly what you need."

Lucas looked at him bewildered for a moment.

"When did you get so smart? And why don't you ever sound this good when you're complaining about writing English papers the night before they're due?"

"Shut up man," Nathan was the one to say this time.

He and Lucas laughed it off, but Lucas couldn't shake the feeling that Nathan was right about what he had said.

* * *

Brooke stood in her kitchen, looking around and hoping that something might actually look good.

She had been grocery shopping that day for the essentials and other things she would want around the house, but as she was shopping it didn't really occur to her to buy stuff that she could make dinner with.

Brooke actually loved to cook. She was exactly an expert, but she loved it because when she was younger her dad would always let her help out in the kitchen as he made the family dinners.

Now she was hungry and nothing seemed appealing. Including cooking; that took too much effort right now and she was still exhausted. The last two months had been hell on her in getting enough sleep, but that wasn't even the problem. Two months isn't that hard to catch up on, but Brooke hadn't slept well for an extended period of time since the end of last summer. The stress, worrying, and the pressure started getting to her and now she had almost forgotten what it was like to have a good night's sleep. Not a good one in comparison to what she usually got, but an actual good night's sleep.

Brooke shut the refrigerator door and sighed. She would just order in pizza or something, but of course she didn't have any take out menus in the house seeing as no one had lived there in far too long.

Brooke was about to give up on her search for a real dinner in favor of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich when she heard the doorbell ring.

"Who the hell…" Brooke muttered. No one besides Rachel knew she was there, right?

Brooke made her way to the large front door and let out a long deep breath before opening it.

"Hi."

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review.**

**-OTHfan326 **


	3. Tell Me About the Davis

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks so much for the reviews last chapter. There were a few less than the first, but that's okay because they were all amazing. (Although I would love if i got some more reviews this chapter)**

** This chapter has a lot of Brucas, Lucas/friends, and it leads up to some BIG stuff, so this is really important. I'm going to update again Sunday evening (NYC time), but after that I can't update as much until the end of the week. After Friday I'm on SPRING BREAK for two weeks, so you can expect a lot of updates then. **

**Disclaimer: Clearly I don't own OTH. If I did, why would I be writing on this site? The only thing I own here is the plot.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

_"Hi."_

"Hi," Brooke said waving slightly, in a split second trying to figure out why Lucas, doesn't even give a last name, just showed up at her doorstep.

"Hey," Lucas stumbled over a single word. '_Idiot_' he berated himself. Yes, he could tell this morning that Brooke was gorgeous, but standing in front of her now, he was a little speechless. Brooke was standing in front of him in shorts and a tank top that exposed a small strip of her toned stomach. Not to mention the fact that her hair was still wet from the shower she obviously just took so it was still dripping onto her top a little.

"Um, what are you doing here?" Brooke asked.

"Right," Lucas snapped back to reality. "Wow, you probably find this really creepy," Lucas said, looking down and rubbing his forehead with his free hand.

"Depends what you're here for," Brooke said, kinking an eyebrow slightly. _Did I just flirt with him?_ Brooke asked herself and felt her heart rate increase quickly; it had been a while since she had even though about flirting with a guy.

Lucas picked his head up slightly and lifted up the brown paper bag that read 'Karen's Café'.

"I figured since you're new and alone, you could use dinner," Lucas said as more of a question.

Brooke tilted her head to the side and gave him a half smile. "Thanks," she said and Lucas smiled back.

"So do you want to come in?" Brooke suggested as she stepped away from the door and gave Lucas space to enter.

"Yeah, thanks," Lucas said as he stepped in. "So since you've already established the fact that I ask a lot of questions, you mind if I ask a few more?" Lucas asked as he took out the food and Brooke got plates.

"Sure, what do you want to drink?" Brooke asked as she opened the fridge.

"Water, please."

"So what's the first question?" Brooke asked as they settled down.

"What on earth do you plan on doing down here for an entire summer? Better yet, what did you do today?"

Brooke chuckled a little and took a sip of her water before contemplating the answer. "Today, I did some basic errands, you know, food, cleaning, drove around town. Then of course I went for a run, swim, and….that's about it."

"Sounds riveting," Lucas joked. "And the rest of the summer?"  
"I have no idea."

Lucas nodded, trying to understand.

"So why'd you come here? I mean what are you trying to find or get away from?"  
Brooke stared at her plate for a minute, contemplating the question and what it would feel like to answer it.

"I'm not really sure that I'm ready to answer that one," Brooke said quietly, finally looking back up at him.

"Okay," Lucas said softly.

"How about you tell me about yourself first? Then we'll see if I'm ready to talk."

"Okay," Lucas said more enthusiastically this time. There was a hint of fear in her eyes that told him not to push the subject. Whether it was fear of what had happened or fear of how it made her feel, he didn't know, but he was definitely interested in finding out.

"Well…" Brooke ushered him.

"I'm thinking about where to start," Lucas said. "The basics are that…."

"That what?" Brooke asked kindly, noticing the almost disturbed look in his eyes when he tried to think of the basics.

"There are no real basics of my life now that I think about it. Even the usually basic things are far more complicated than they appear."

"Well you've certainly got my attention now."

Lucas chuckled. "Alright," he said; took another bite of his burger, a sip of his water and settled in. "My mom, Karen," he said, pointing to the bag that said 'Karen's Café', had me right out of high school and my father, who had another son three months later, didn't want to be a part of my life until he ran for mayor a year and a half ago. So now I can only spend every other weekend with my mother and I have to spend the rest of my time with my father."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

"But that doesn't really tell me anything about you, it tells me about your parents. It tells me that your father is an ass and your mother is probably the strongest person you know."

"Very true and duly noted," Lucas said. "As for me…I love basketball and I love to read."

"Whoaaa," Brooke feigned shock. "You really let me into your soul on that one."

"Well I didn't know that you were expecting something deep."

"You showed up at my house with dinner because you're curious about me, not because you want to screw me. If that were the case then you would have hit on me when I answered the door wearing practically nothing."  
"You're very blunt, you know that?" Lucas questioned rhetorically. "But you're very good at reading people."

"I know," Brooke smiled sweetly. She pointed over to the living room and when Lucas looked over and saw two AP Psychology books sitting on the coffee table.

"You're spending your summer studying?" Lucas asked surprised that she was taking that course and that she'd even consider spending part of her summer studying.

"Sort of," Brooke shrugged.

"You don't strike me as…"

"Smart?" Brooke asked a little offended.

"I was going to say as someone who spends their summers in the books."

"Well I'm taking three APs next year and like I said, I don't exactly have many plans this summer, so I figured I could get ahead a little as I relax by the pool."

Lucas nodded and then shook his head. "Three APs?"

Brooke giggled a little. "Psych, bio, and US history."

"Impressive."

"Thank you, but back to you. Unless your not comfortable answering the questions or anything, cause if your not then w—"

"Brooke," Lucas stopped her with a grin.

"Yeah?"

"Your rambling."

"Sorry."

"It's cute," Lucas said genuinely, almost blushing the way Brooke did. "But maybe I'm not ready to give up that kind of information either. I mean I did just meet you this morning."

"Alright then, what do you expect to talk about?" Brooke asked with a hint of suggestiveness to her voice. There was a moment then, looking into his deep blue eyes when she felt something. Maybe it was distraction, maybe happiness, or security; like the world around them didn't exist for a few minutes. Then the next moment, when this dawned on her, she realized that it was the first time in a long time that she wasn't thinking about the things that normally plagued her thoughts. That realization of course brought on those thoughts once again.

"You okay?" Lucas asked.

"What?" Brooke asked, snapping out of her dazed state and back into attention.

"You seemed kinda lost for a second there."

"I was kinda lost for a second there."

"Do I dare to ask why?"

Before Brooke could even decide on an answer; sarcasm or truth, a light buzzing sound stopped her.

Lucas rolled his eyes and produced his cell phone from his pocket.

"Sorry," he said before flipping it open and reading the text out loud. "How's it going with the mystery girl?"

"Who sent it?" Brooke asked, giggling a little at her being Lucas' mystery girl.

"My brother," Lucas shook his head laughing a little. "It's alright. He can make fun of me for this because I bother him about being in love with my best friend but being to chicken to admit it." Lucas explained as he texted a quick 'go away' back to Nathan. When he looked back up he was surprised at what he saw.

The first impression that he got of Brooke was that she was incredibly strong and independent. That's why it surprised him to look up and see the glossy eyes of a girl who looked like she was about to fall apart.

"Are you okay?" Lucas asked worriedly.

Brooke nodded and blinked twice; the tears were gone just as quickly as they had come.

Brooke spoke again, but this time her voice was different. It was so quiet that it almost, just almost masked the crack in it. The crack that was step one to the crying she was trying so desperately to avoid.

"Can you tell me about your brother?"

It was nervous and hesitant, but something about the pleading sincerity in her voice told Lucas not to ask questions, but in fact to just talk about his brother like she asked.

* * *

Two hours! Brooke couldn't believe it when she saw the microwave clock in the kitchen when she went to get a new bottle of water. Two hours they had spent talking about anything and everything.

Brooke had listened as Lucas talked about his whole relationship with Nathan. He talked about the fights and basketball and the friendship that had formed somewhere along the way. He told Brooke about how though they both loved basketball equally, he sometimes felt that Nathan had more of a drive to play the sport than he did; Lucas just wanted to play the _game_ he loved.

Brooke laughed when Lucas told her how he and Nathan would always end up in a competition to see who could play their music louder from their rooms. Lucas was always listening to rock and Nathan rap. Brooke kept the smile on her face even when it faltered a little as she remembered how she and Matt used to do the same thing, but they always ended up finding some oldies to listen to together.

They talked about Tree Hill and New York and somehow even got onto the topic of the weather. But as much as they talked about, they seemed to be surprised the whole time at how naturally it came with each other.

And Brooke was still amazed as she grabbed another bottle of water and walked back to the kitchen table.

"Nathan bothering you again?" Brooke asked as she saw Lucas looking down at his cell phone again.

"More like giving me fair warning to get home on time before daddy blows a gasket."

"Oh."

"Can I see you again?" Lucas asked, maybe a little too eagerly, he thought.

"I'd like that," Brooke said smiling, revealing the dimples that Lucas had already found he loved.

"Uhh," Lucas looked around for a second before spotting a pen and pad on the kitchen counter. He quickly scribbled down his cell number and then pushed the pad towards Brooke. "That's my cell. Call me sometime, okay?"

Brooke eyed the number for a second before ripping off the bottom half of the paper and writing her own number down.

"How about you call me?" Brooke said, holding up the strip of paper for Lucas to take.

"Okay," Lucas said, grinning a little.

"Thanks for dinner, Lucas," Brooke said as they walked to the front door.

"My pleasure," Lucas said, holding her gaze for an extra second before stepping out onto the front porch.

"I guess I'll talk to you soon," Lucas suggested.

"I guess so."

Lucas turned toward her and hesitated for a second before slowly leaning in and placing a lingering kiss on her cheek.

"Night Brooke," he whispered.

With that he turned and quickly headed down the front steps, down the driveway and into his car before driving away.

* * *

That night Brooke was barely listening to the TV as the late night talk show illuminated the room. She couldn't stop thinking about Lucas.

Of course, Lucas couldn't stop thinking about her either. After getting home Lucas quickly ran up to his room and shut the door; careful to avoid his father or Nathan who he knew would be questioning him about his night.

Lucas lay on his bed and pulled out the piece of paper with Brooke's number on it. He stared at it for a few seconds before entering the number into his phone, just as Brooke had done with his number a little earlier.

Brooke, like Lucas, had many text messages awaiting her that night. While Lucas' were all from Haley and Peyton asking how his night went, Brooke's were from a concerned Rachel who knew nothing about Lucas yet.

Lucas spent that night staring at the ceiling. Brooke was occupying his thoughts, making it a bit hard to sleep.

Brooke on the other hand, felt more at ease than she had in a long time. Talking to Lucas, the boy who she now couldn't stop thinking about, let her relax and not worry about anything else. That is why, for the first time in months, Brooke slept soundly.

* * *

"Okay," Haley said as she sat down at their usual lunch table. "Time for you to spill."

"Spill what?" Lucas asked, looking up from his math book. Finals were next week and studying was quickly taking over most of his life.

"Spill about what happened last night," Nathan said as he sat down next to Haley.

Lucas rolled his eyes and tried to get back to his math.

"What's going on?" Jake asked as he and Peyton sat down to see Nathan and Haley eying Lucas.

"I'm about to beat some information out of Lucas," Nathan told them.

"Sweet, why?" Peyton asked.

"Cause he met up with some mystery girl last night and now he won't give up the details."

"Seriously?" Peyton asked, tilting her head and looking at Lucas.

"Yep," Nathan said, popping a fry into his mouth.

"Dude, what happened last night?" Jake asked.

"Nothing!" Lucas yelled, not wanting to disclose anything. He didn't know why, but at the moment, he really didn't want anyone else to know about the evening he shared with Brooke.

"Clearly it was something," Haley said, "because you're…different today."

"Look," Lucas said getting frustrated. "I met a girl, I had dinner with her last night, that's it!"

When he realized how much his voice had risen, Lucas sighed and rubbing his face in his hands.

"Sorry," he said quietly. "Look, I'm gonna get some work done in the library. I'll see you guys later," he told them. Lucas gathered his stuff and got up, mumbling a quick 'bye' before he made his way to the library.

The other four sat silently as they watched Lucas walk away. Once he entered the building they all turned back to each other.

"Okay, either he's really sexually frustrated, or something bigger is going on than we think," Peyton was the first to speak.

"Seriously," Nathan muttered.

"I think it's good for him," Jake piped up.

"What's good for him?" Peyton asked.

"Clearly he's interested in this girl. I mean, when was the last time that Lucas had dinner with a girl? And pizza with a bunch of friends before trying to sleep with her doesn't count." Jake said.

"He's got a point," Nathan said.

"I know I do," Jake smiled proudly. "But the point is that I think that we shouldn't tease him about this, I mean I don't want to scare him from this girl if maybe she could help him."

"I agree, but help him how?" Nathan asked.

"I don't know, maybe help him get out of the 'different hook up every weekend' pattern, or maybe just make him happy," Jake said.

"I think you're a genius," Peyton agreed and kissed him softly.

"Why thank you."

"Cut it out, would you?" Nathan interrupted them.

"Whatever," Jake said, pulling Peyton closer.

"Hales, you alright?" Nathan asked after a minute, noticing that Haley hadn't said anything in a while.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Haley said. "I'm just going to see if I can try and find Lucas."

"Oh," Nathan said as he watched her stand and gather her things. "Do you want me to come with you?" Nathan asked.

"No, I kinda want to see if I can talk to him alone, but thanks," Haley said sincerely.

"Alright, I'll talk to you later then?" Nathan asked a little hesitantly.

"Definitely," Haley smiled and walked away in the direction that Lucas took minutes before.

"Dude, just ask her out already," Jake said, trying to hold in his laughter.

"Shut up," Nathan said, rolling his eyes and throwing a fry at Jake.

* * *

"Hey," Haley said softly as she approached Lucas in the library.

"Hey," He smiled up at his best friend and pulled a seat out for her at the small table he was sitting at.

"So," Haley started as she sat down. "Any chance you'll tell me what's going on?"

Lucas stopped writing in his notebook and began to twiddle his pencil as he looked at Haley. Like Nathan and Peyton, he and Haley had known each other since kindergarten, but they shared a much stronger bond than Nathan and Peyton. He and Haley knew each other better than anyone else, they shared secrets, and most of all, they knew when big was going on with the other. That's why Lucas knew it was okay to talk to her about this; she wouldn't tell anyone else and she listen to him carefully, being the best friend that she is.

Lucas sighed and put down his pencil. He dug his hands deep into the pockets of his shorts and leaned forward a bit.

"I just met the girl," he started. "I couldn't sleep so I went for a run and she was just…there."

"There?"

"There," Lucas confirmed. "You know that huge house with the red door?"

"The old Davis house?"

"Yeah, her name's Brooke Davis," Lucas said. "That's her house. Her grandmother left it to her and her cousins or something. Anyway, she just got here a couple nights ago and she was sitting out there."

"So how'd you go from seeing her on your morning run to having dinner with her?"

"Be patient, I'm getting there," Lucas shook his head, smiling a little. "So that was yesterday morning, and we talked then. I left my ipod and she brought it to me at lunch an—"

"She was in that car!"

"Yeah," Lucas laughed a little as he saw the look of realization on Haley's face.

"I still don't get how you went from that to taking dinner at her house."

"Well she's here for the summer and she's staying alone, so I figured I'd bring her something to eat. I mean she just got here and she told me that she doesn't really know anyone; that the trip was kinda planned last minute."

"Sounds a little sketchy," Haley said raising her eyebrows.

"Not really," Lucas told her. "I mean I understand what you're saying, but I think something pretty big happened to her and she was trying to…"

"Run away?" Haley suggested implying that Brooke's motives for coming to Tree Hill still sounded a little questionable.

"I guess," Lucas shrugged. "I don't really know what happened though."

Haley nodded along. "So what happened last night?"  
"We just talked."

"Talked?" Haley repeated skeptically.

"Yeah," Lucas said, not being able to control the smile that played on his lips when he thought about it. "It just felt natural like when you and Nathan talk," Lucas said, not noticing the slight blush that crept across Haley's cheeks when Lucas mentioned her and Nathan. "It just felt right."

Haley grinned at him with a knowing look.

"What?" he asked.

"You like her already, don't you?" Haley said as more of a statement.

Lucas looked down and shrugged. "Kinda," he mumbled but then looked back up. "Is that weird?"

"No," Haley said, still smiling at Lucas. She had noticed that as they talked about him and Brooke that he seemed a bit more like the old Lucas than he had recently. There was something about the sincerity and shyness in his voice and the look in his eye that reminded Haley of Lucas before his ordeal with Dan.

"Why are you smiling like an idiot?" Lucas asked.

"You were smiling the whole time you were talking about Brooke."

"That doesn't answer the question."

"I just think she's good for you."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because you care about her in whatever weird way you do after knowing someone for a day. Because you brought her dinner and talked to her instead of screwing with some random cheerleader's ego by flirting with them, and because you actually seem lighter, relaxed, maybe even happy when you talk about her. Whatever it is that she's done in a few hours of conversation, I'm grateful and I want to meet her."

"I don't know…"

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want you all to scare her away!"

Haley laughed a little but relented.

"I'll be nice, I promise."

Lucas took a deep breath and let it out as he nodded.

"Fine," he finally said before taking out his cell phone.

* * *

Brooke sat alone in the sun room of her house. She remembered her and Laura calling it the sunroom because they always complained of how bright it was. The large glass windows and doors that made up an entire side of the room let in huge amounts of sunlight; thus, making it the sun room.

Brooke sat on the floor, leaning her back against one of the couches. Her ipod was playing softly from one of the many speakers installed throughout the house, and besides that, the place was silent.

Brooke looked around at the items on the floor. She had never really made photo albums like this before. At home they had about half a dozen boxes of pictures in a closet, and in her room she had her favorite pictures framed or attached to the frame of her mirror. But she had never really made an album like this.

This was actually her therapist's idea; a way to always have access to the happy memories of him instead of the ones that haunted her these days.

After the year she had, seeing a psychologist had helped her a lot in the past six weeks. She would go in, talk about everything, feel a little better, and then leave believing that everyone could move on and be okay again. But then she would get home and that hope would be shattered. Then she resented her sessions because those were the days that she would take one step forward and then two steps back once she got home again.

But Brooke still listened to her. And that's why now she was sitting surrounded by photos of Matt, with her or with his friends or with family, but they were all of Matt. She even had newspaper clippings from the school paper that talked about him and showed pictures of his athletic achievements.

She hadn't really started to make the album yet. Right now she was just organizing the pictures by a category and then by date. Right now, organizing was all she could handle with the memories that were coming back by looking at all of the pictures.

She was holding one picture in particular. It was weird looking at it now, but it was still one of her favorites. The date on the back of the photo confirmed the story behind it. It was the day that Brooke was taken home from the hospital. She was only a few days old, but Matt was already seven. In the picture Matt was cradling her in his arms, staring down at her with a huge smile on his face.

The hint of a smile had crossed her face as she stared at the picture, but her thoughts were broken by the buzzing of her cell phone next to her.

Brooke carefully placed the picture back down in its appropriate pile and reached for her phone to find a text message from Lucas.

**"Is it too soon to ask to see u again?"**

Brooke smiled at the text message and began typing.

**"Depends on what you have in mind…"**

Barely thirty seconds later her phone was buzzing again with a new message.

**"My mom's café at 4?"**

Brooke read the text message and grinned.

**"See you then."**

She quickly sent back then closed her phone, still smiling.

* * *

"Dude, lay off the coffee," Nathan smirked at Lucas as he took a seat next to him at the counter in the café.

"What?" Lucas and Haley, who was standing behind the counter, asked.

"You're leg's shaking and you can't stop moving your hands," Nathan pointed out, "too much caffeine."

"He's just nervous," Haley said with a knowing smile.

"Why?" Nathan asked. "Wait, no, let me guess; mystery girl again?"

"Yep," Lucas said.

"She's meeting him here," Haley told Nathan.

"Ohhh," Nathan said as he turned on his stool to look at Lucas again. The smirk was prominent on his face again.

"Nathan," Haley whispered and turned back toward her in time to see her shaking her head and mouthing 'he likes her' to him.

"Oh," Nathan repeated without the dirty connotation.

"Yeah," Lucas mumbled

"Lucas?"

Lucas turned to see a very sexy and a little nervous Brooke standing behind him.

"Brooke?" It was Nathan who asked the question.

"Nathan?" Brooke asked.

"Wait, what?" Lucas and Haley asked.

"Brooke?"

They all turned to see Peyton and Jake coming back from the 'bathroom'.

"Peyton?" Brooke asked.

"What's going on here?" Jake asked.

"I have no idea," Lucas said quietly.

"Okay, hold on," Brooke held her hand up and quieted the group down. "_That_ Nathan is your brother Nathan?" Brooke asked Lucas.

"Yeah, how do _you_ know him?"

"I used to hang out with him and Peyton when I would spend summers down here."

"Oh."

"Wait a minute!" Nathan called out with a sly smile and a laugh he was barely containing. "You're his mystery girl aren't you?!"  
"Oh god," Brooke muttered slightly embarrassed but also realizing that Nathan hadn't changed much in the past few years. "Peyton!" Brooke decided to ignore Nathan and hug Peyton who was happy to see her. "How are you?"

"Good; it's great to see you."

"Yeah, you too," Brooke said genuinely thankful for knowing more people in the town than just Lucas.

"So how have you been?" Peyton asked her and for a moment Brooke's smile faltered.

"You know, gettin' by," Brooke answered with a shrug that made it look like more of a joke than a reality. But that's exactly what she wanted. She could no longer lie and say she was doing well; making the truth seem insignificant worked much better for her.

"So where's everyone else?" Peyton asked, referring to Matt, Greg, and Laura.

"It's just me this year," Brooke said with a cracked voice; the question had brought up a feeling she hated. Anxiety was pretty common in her family; her mother was unbelievably neurotic and a little OCD about some things. Both traits rubbed off on her two children.

That's why Brooke knew what was coming when her breathing quickened and she felt her chest tightening; she also figured her face had flushed by now. Then the nervous habit started to kick in; the one where she began rubbing her collarbone between her neck and her left shoulder. Anyone really close to Brooke knew that to be one of her dead giveaways for any type of stress.

"Not even Matt?" Nathan asked incredulously. He knew that even when both sides of the family didn't come down, she and Matt always came down together. But unlike the rest of the group, Nathan didn't see Brooke's clear signs of discomfort and emotional pain. "How is he anyway?"

Brooke tore her eyes from the spot on the counter that she had been staring at to avoid all other eyes and looked up at Nathan. She could feel the lump in her throat beginning to form and she knew that the tears weren't far off. This was the first time that she ever even had to think about explaining what had happened; everyone back home knew about it so they never asked her.

"I uh," Brooke started. She couldn't even say the sentence. Her therapist had tried to get her to say those few important words and she would start the sentence, but she was never able to say the last word.

"Brooke?" Lucas asked. The concern in his voice almost broke Brooke at that moment.

"I can't answer that," Brooke told Nathan, desperately tried to hold back the tears and the sobs at the same time.

Everyone was silent. No one knew how to react to her. Peyton and Nathan were curious and in shock at the same time. They knew that family and wanted to know what was going on, but at the same time they knew Brooke; they knew that she was always happy and energetic. She was never like this.

"I'm sorry," Brooke said. The anxiety and the urge to cry was beginning to take over and she could barely breathe. "I gotta go."

They all stood silently as they watched Brooke hurry out to the café and towards her car which was parked right outside.

After a second of trying – and failing – to comprehend what just happened, Lucas jumped to his feet and ran out after her.

"Brooke!" He called and ran up to her.

She hadn't gotten in her car yet. Instead she was leaning against the door on the driver's side with her back to the café. Although the fresh air instantly allowed her to breathe again, the sobs she was trying to hold back make it difficult again.

"Brooke," Lucas said softly as he approached her. He saw the tear stained cheeks and how hard she was trying not to completely breakdown right there. "Are you okay?" He asked softly. Brooke looked up at him and immediately suppressed her tears and sobs, much to Lucas' horror. He had never seen someone shut down her emotions so abruptly before. Although he didn't know what was going on with her, he knew that it was serious and something this serious shouldn't be held in like that.

"What do you want from me?" Brooke asked. It was harsh, quick, and to the point.

"What are you talking about?" Lucas asked, not understanding why she was asking him like that so suddenly.

"If you're looking for a summer fling or something like that, you should give up now because I have way too much baggage for that, okay?" Brooke said and got in the car before Lucas could even answer.

Lucas stood watching for a few seconds as her car drove quickly down the street and turned the corner.

Bewildered by what just happened, Lucas turned back and headed into the café.

"Lucas?" Haley was the first to talk to him when he came inside. "Is she alright?"

"I don't know," Lucas distractedly replied. "Hey Nate?" Lucas looked up at Nathan who had an equally confused expression on his face.

"Yeah?"

"What can you tell me about the Davis'?" Lucas asked. Maybe this was that weird hero complex that Haley always talked about kicking in or maybe he just really cared for her already. Whatever it was, he needed to know more about her if he wanted to help her.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review.**

**-OTHfan326 **


	4. The Big Explanation

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks so much for the reviews last chapter!!!**

**This chapter's reading is a little heavier (less dialogue, more explaining). But it'll explain basically everything that you all have been asking me about. I really hope that you like this chapter. **

**Disclaimer: Clearly I don't own OTH. If I did, why would I be writing on this site? The only thing I own here is the plot.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

Lucas sat in his car at the end of the driveway and stared at the house on the other side. It was a classic looking house, but the bold red door stood out among all of the houses on the street.

He was debating if he should go in. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but there was something about Brooke Davis that had his complete attention, and all he wanted to do was go inside and help her. But he didn't know if he should. He had no idea what was going on with her, and he wasn't sure if it was his place to try to help.

He was thinking now about what he had learned about Brooke Davis and her family. At least about what Nathan and Peyton knew about her.

_Forty minutes ago in the café… _

_"So can you tell me about her?" Lucas asked Nathan and Peyton as all five of them sat down at a table. _

_"Okay, um," Nathan started. "Sophia Davis, her father's mother, is the one that owned the house." _

_"She had two sons," Peyton cut in. "Robert, who lives in New York, is her dad and Kenneth, who lives in Boston, is her uncle." _

_"Yeah," Nathan cut back in. "They both have an older son and a younger daughter. It was Brooke and her brother Matt, then Greg and Laura." _

_"And the four of them would come down each summer. Occasionally their parents would come down too, but mostly it was just them because their parents had to work. In addition to the family wealth, Brooke's father owns an unbelievably successful hedge fund and her mother is a doctor." _

_"Wow," Lucas said. "When did they stop coming down here?" _

_"Like three summers ago. Then Mrs. Davis died and they didn't want to come back so we stopped hearing from them," Peyton said. _

_"So you don't know what's going on with her?" Lucas asked. _

_"Not a clue," Nathan told him. "But I've never seen her like that before." _

_"Yeah," Peyton agreed. "I always remembered her as being incredibly fun and energetic; like she never let anything get to her." _

_Lucas nodded. That would explain her refusal to cry in front of him. _

It went a little longer. Nathan and Peyton told him some of the things they used to do together and so forth. Eventually Peyton and Jake left together, and then Lucas left as well so that Nathan and Haley would be alone together. He got in his car and started driving; before he realized it, he was in front of Brooke's house.

After much deliberation, he finally decided to find Brooke, so he got out of his car and walked up to the door. He knew she was home because her car was in the driveway, but she didn't answer the door after he rang multiple times.

Sighing, Lucas turned to leave, but then got another idea. Lucas walked along the perimeter of the house until he had reached the backyard and found what he wanted. Sitting alone and silent at the edge of the large pool was Brooke.

He approached her carefully; not wanting to scare her. She was silent; the only sound that he could hear was the water swirling from the slow rhythmic kicking of her legs that were dipped into the pool until about two thirds of the way up her shins. She held her hands in place under her thighs and stared at the water in front of her. He watched her for a moment as he stood a few feet behind her before he decided to speak up.

"Brooke," he said softly.

She jumped a little and snapped her head around.

"What are you doing here Lucas?" She asked him. He had expected her tone to be fairly cold, but instead it was tired and slightly frustrated.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay," Lucas told her as he took a see next to her, slipping off his flip flops before he too put his feet into the water.

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why? Why do you care?"

"I don't know; I just do," Lucas said shrugging. "Any chance you're going to talk to me?"

"Lucas you don't want to have to deal with the stuff I'm dealing with. I've got way too much baggage for you."

"How do you know? You haven't told me yet."

"I can't tell you," Brooke said almost sadly.

"Why not?"

"A lot of reasons."

"Can you at least tell me the reasons?" Lucas asked, trying to push her further.

"First of all, I've known you for a day and a half, that's not nearly long enough. Second, the number of people outside my family that know the _whole_ story can be counted on one hand. And third….third is that I cannot even form the words to tell you. Every time I try to talk about it, I literally cannot speak about it. It's impossible to just say what I try to."

Lucas listened and was surprised to hear how few people knew about what was going on, but that wasn't the reason why he was keeping quiet. The last thing he said struck him, and after a moment, he finally found exactly what he wanted to say.

"And would it have been worth it, after all," Lucas began.

"What?" Brooke interrupted him but Lucas just ignored her and went on, keeping his eyes glued to the water in front of him.

"Would it have been worth while, After the sunsets and the dooryards and the sprinkled streets, After the novels, after the teacups, after the skirts that trail along the floor— And this, and so much more?— It is impossible to say just what I mean! But as if a magic lantern threw the nerves in patterns on a screen: Would it have been worth while If one, settling a pillow or throwing off a shawl, And turning toward the window, should say: 'That is not it at all, That is not what I meant, at all.'"

When he turned back to Brooke, he found her staring at him with a small closed smile on her face.

"T.S. Elliot," Lucas told her. "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock."

"Do I dare to eat a peach?" Brooke asked.

"Yeah," Lucas smiled, surprised he knew.

"We read it last year," Brooke said. "But that's all that I really remembered. My best friend and my then boyfriend were in that class so I didn't really pay attention to the specifics." Brooke told him. "But I should have," she added. "I used to love to read."

"Used to?" Lucas asked.

"I don't have time anymore. I got a social life and I have practice after school everyday and an ungodly amount of work. Reading just slipped through the cracks….then again, so did a lot of things that used to mean something to me."

"I read all the time," Lucas said with an almost faraway gaze. "It's one of the few things that keep me sane," he told her, hoping that if he told her about his life, then she would tell him what was going on with her.

"Why are you going insane?" Brooke asked, trying to mask her obvious interest in him.

"Because I can't figure out what _I_ want anymore," he said softly.

"What do you mean?"

"My mom wants me to keep up good grades and good morals at the same time; my 'friends' want me to be this basketball playing and partying king, and Dan wants me to get better and better at basketball. Everyone wants something from me but I don't know how much longer I can give everyone what they want. And I know how conceited that sounds, but it's what I feel like."

Brooke nodded. "You know you're being Dan Scott's son explains a lot about you. Why didn't you tell me that _he_ was your father yesterday?" Brooke asked. Because she knew Nathan so well, she also knew how crazy and controlling Dan was when it came to basketball.

"Because you know who he is," Lucas told her. "Everyone who knows that Dan is my father knows that I'm his bastard son, and I kinda liked not being that person for once. I liked not having to be anyone but myself, and I got to be that person when I met you."

"You can still be that person, you know? With me and with everyone else."

"I know," Lucas said quietly. "I guess I'm just…"

"Ashamed?" Brooke asked and Lucas gave a slight nod. He wanted to tell her about himself, but he didn't expect to get to such emotional topics. There was just something about her that put him at ease.

"You shouldn't be," Brooke told him sternly. "You did nothing wrong and people know that. It's all on him."

Lucas nodded again and let out a shaky breath.

"You know yesterday morning when I was running it was because I was so unbelievably stressed and overwhelmed from everything going on right now. But then I saw you, and I talked to you, and I felt like I could—"

"Breath," Brooke finished for him.

"Yeah," Lucas said, turning to her and smiling a little but his smile faded suddenly. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that; it was a little much."

"No, it's okay," Brooke said quietly, "I felt the same thing."

Lucas squinted slightly and smile at her before they both turned their attention back to the water, silent the whole time.

"Brooke?" Lucas asked after turning towards her once again.

"Yeah?" She asked and then slowly drew her eyes away from the water to look into his.

"It's okay for you to tell me whatever's going on. I won't tell anyone and I can help you."

"You can't help me," Brooke said quietly.

"I think you're wrong," Lucas said with more confidence. "I can at least help you by listening."

Brooke sighed and looked back to the water for a moment.

"We should go inside," she said quietly. She took her feet out of the water and slipped on her flip flops. She motioned for Lucas to do the same before she turned and headed back to the house.

Lucas followed her inside and closed the sliding glass door behind him before finding her in the living room. She had somehow slipped on a pair of oversized grey sweatpants. He could make out part of a school name on them, but the rest was covered from the way she was sitting. Her back was against one of the armrests and her knees were curled up to her chest with her arms wrapped around them. Her vulnerability dawned on Lucas and as he looked at her for a minute, he also figured she was subconsciously trying to protect herself by the way she was sitting. Not wanting to get too close and scare her, he sat on the other side of the couch and turned to face her.

"I probably shouldn't be telling you this," Brooke started. "Like I said I've only known you for a day and a half, but if you really know then I guess I can tell you."

Lucas opened his mouth to say something, but he quickly closed it when he realized that interrupting her might stop her for good.

"Most people know what happened two months ago, but only a few know that everything started at the end of last summer," Brooke started quietly, staring at her hands that were resting on her knees. "When it all started there was an agreement in my family not to tell anyone so that it would be easier for my brother. My mom eventually let me tell my best friend, Rachel, but besides that I didn't tell anyone. I mean, I didn't even have to tell my therapist because my mother told her," Brooke said with a bitter tone. "Eventually I just stopped talking about everything with my parents, and somewhere along the line of shutting my self down I got this idea into my head that talking to people about what I was going through would just burden them."

"Brooke," Lucas said softly, shaking his head slightly.

"I know," Brooke said, looking up at him. "I know," she repeated softly and sighed.

"What happened?" Lucas asked gently, trying to push her without forcing her.

"Ten months ago, in the middle of August, my brother was diagnosed with MS," Brooke said with a conviction that surprised her. "Multiple Sclerosis," she repeated softly as she began to feel her throat tighten.

"Jesus Brooke," Lucas whispered, feeling his heart drop. This was definitely not what he was expecting; maybe a shady past or bad relationship that she needed to get away from, but definitely not this. Lucas couldn't even fathom what it would be like to have Nathan go through that.

"It fucked my family up to say the least," Brooke said, the bitter sarcasm returning for a second. "My brother was scared to death of Copaxone which is the medication he had to inject himself with every day. My dad was frustrated because he couldn't help my brother. My mother who is normally neurotic went into overdrive with _everything_; nutrition, exercise, sleeping, doing well in school, cleaning…_everything_." Brooke repeated, making it more than clear that her relationship with her mother wasn't exactly on the best of terms.

"And you?" Lucas asked.

"I was…a lot of things. I was terrified for my brother. I was stressed with my junior year of high school. I was going crazy with my mother who was on my back about everything. And I was just tired."

"Tired?"

"I got so stressed; I mean I was worried about Matt all the time, I was killing myself over school, my mom was driving me up the wall, and I held it all in. I started having problems sleeping which kept me from concentrating and remembering everything which made it harder to do well in school which in turn made me more stressed which kept me from sleeping again. It was a pretty vicious cycle," Brooke said, the emotions bubbling up inside her just thinking about it. The anger, frustration, depression. It all hit hard that year.

"So yeah, I was tired physically; I mean I was basically sleep deprived for most of the year. But I was just tired of everything. I was tired of dealing with my mom, I was tried of trying to hold everything in and make it look like I was okay, I was tired of living the way I did this year."

Lucas stared at the broken girl before him in shock. Part of him didn't know what to say, but part of him just wanted to move closer and wipe away the lone tear that trickled down her cheek. But Brooke sucked in a deep breath and quickly wiped it away herself.

"Besides the injections Matt was able to lead a pretty normal life so no one had to know about it all. The only other time you knew he had MS was when he had a flare up."

"Flare up?" Lucas asked.

"When his symptoms showed; he would get numbness in his arms or legs," Brooke explained. "He had moved out a few months before he was diagnosed because he was 23 then, but after August he started coming home on the weekends every few weeks for doctor's appointments and just cause he felt safer at home…I remember the first time he had one of those flare ups. He was at the gym working out so his body temperature had been raised and when he got home he was standing at the fridge drinking a bottle of water when he started to get pins and needles in his right arm. I was doing work in my room when I heard him yelling for my mom. She threw him in a cool shower to get his body temperature down and she sat with him in his room trying to calm him down until he fell asleep next to her," Brooke said, taking a moment to try and hold herself together after the first sob escaped her lips.

When she regained her composure she continued. "I remember that night I was in our bathroom getting ready for bed when he came in to get something. I asked him if he was okay and he smiled and said 'yeah'…to this day that smile haunts me."

"Why?"

"Because it was the same smile I give people when I'm breaking down but I don't want anyone to know."

"Oh."

"Yeah," Brooke let out a small bitter laugh. "Oh," she repeated.

"But he got through it then," Brooke started again. "And he started to learn to manage everything; he didn't need to come home so much and he seemed to be happier and he got this great job and it just seemed to be good for a while."

"For a while?" Lucas asked with hesitation; he wasn't sure if he wanted to hear what happened next because the look in Brooke's eyes said that it was only going to get worse.

"It was a bunch of circumstances," Brooke mumbled.

"What?" Lucas asked. He was a little alarmed when he saw Brooke try to wrap her arms around herself tightly and protect herself from what she was about to say.

"Pile together a few unlikely or rare situations and..._it_ happened," Brooke said. As she spoke to him more, she seemed more comfortable. She even began to look him in the eye while she spoke. But now she was in a trace; staring at an invisible dot on the couch and speaking so low that it was almost in audible.

"It was April 12th," Brooke said quietly. Lucas quickly realized that it was June 14th, meaning that her last day in New York was the two month anniversary of whatever she was trying to tell him.

"His best friend Johnny got stuck in Buffalo doing god only knows what so Matt took the train up there to help him out…Johnny had his car but he was in pretty bad shape so Matt was driving back. It was late and the weather was horrible but Matt was a good driver so that didn't affect him. At least _normally_ it wouldn't have affected him. But he was sick then; it was just a cold or a virus or whatever, but it was enough to give him a slight fever. Since he was with Johnny he didn't take his injection because he didn't want Johnny to know. That combined with the fever stared making him feel uneasy," Brooke said, the more she spoke, the more tears gathered in her eyes.

"I only know all this because he called me," Brooke explained. "My parents were at some big event and he couldn't get in touch with them so he called me. He was nervous about not taking his meds. I told him to pull into the next town and get out of the car; go get something drink or eat or whatever just to calm him down so that he didn't have a flare-up."

"Johnny told me after it all happened that they had gotten off the highway and they were going through some town or whatever when Matt woke him up yelling that he couldn't feel his legs. He lost control and went straight through a red light and into an intersection," Brooke said, losing most of the emotion in her voice. "Collision on the driver's side. Johnny got away with a few bruises but uh, Matt d-ied on impact," Brooke said, her voice cracking over the word 'died' and a sob escaping her lips as soon as she got the last word out.

She couldn't control the sobs anymore. This was the first time that she had every told the full story to anyone and the pain was rushing back to her.

Lucas froze for a moment in shock. He couldn't put into words what was going through his head at the moment.

But Brooke's soft crying broke him out of his trance. He jumped up from his spot and rushed to her side.

He pulled her into his arms and held her close. He could feel her shaking in his embrace. He felt her trembling hands take a tight grip on his soft cotton tee shirt; silently begging him not to let her go. And he wouldn't; not until she was ready.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled into his chest. Lucas just held her tighter and shook his head.

"Don't apologize Brooke," He told her softly. "It's okay."

She knew he was only talking about the crying, but for some reason she believed the words more when they were coming from him. At home when people would try to tell her that everything would be okay, she would politely nod along, even though in her mind she wanted to scream and tell them nothing would be okay anymore. But then Lucas said those two words. He didn't even mean it in a larger sense, but somehow his saying it to her made her believe that everything could be okay.

* * *

She hadn't been crying long. There was no way that physically she could have kept up that kind of crying for an extended amount of time, so Lucas just held her close to him and rubbed her back soothingly until she calmed down enough to speak again.

"I miss him," Brooke mumbled into his chest. Lucas loosened his hold on her slightly so that he could pull back and look her in the eye. He nodded in understanding and gently wiped a way the tears. He caressed her cheek; feeling her weakness as she leaned against his strong hand.

"Were you close?" Lucas asked quietly, hoping that he wouldn't upset her further.

"We never used to be," Brooke said, pulling away enough to sit on her own but still be in his embrace. "He was seven years older than me, so by the time he was leaving for college I was just entering middle school," Brooke explained. "But then he graduated and came back home for a while and we got close again. We could finally talk to each other about stuff….and now he's gone," Brooke said, her voice cracking again through the post crying hiccups. "I wasn't ready to lose him," she whispered and fell back into Lucas' arms.

"I'm so sorry," Lucas said quietly into her hair, placing a chaste kiss on the top of her head and holding her close.

"Everything changed again, and this was so much worse than August," Brooke said quietly. "My parents threw themselves into their work; they were basically non-responsive at home unless my mom was yelling at me about my grades. I could hear them crying at night as I did my school work," Brooke said, a horrified look in her eyes. "I had to take care of them and everything else and I just couldn't take it anymore. I miss my home," Brooke tried to hold back a second round of tears. She was too exhausted to cry anymore.

"Is that why you came here?" Lucas asked and she nodded.

"My parents think I'm at this summer thing I was supposed to go to. Only my friend Rachel knows that I'm here," She explained. "I just needed to get away. I was suffocating in that house and I couldn't take it anymore. I know that it was selfish, but I just couldn't…"

"I know, I know," Lucas whispered as he rocked her back and forth, his heart once again breaking for the girl before him.

Brooke knew that he didn't _really_ know. He might have an _idea_ of what was going through her head when she decided to leave shell that was left of her family, but he didn't_understand_. And honestly, she didn't expect him to; telling him alone was good enough for her right now.

"Come on," Lucas said softly when she was quiet for a while. He lifted her to a standing position. "Let's get you into bed."

Brooke nodded and Lucas slowly led her to the stairs.

"Go upstairs and get into bed, I'm just going to call Nathan and tell him where I am, okay?" Lucas suggested softly.

"'Kay," Brooke said softly; bed seemed like a great idea right now with the way she was feeling, but something else caught her attention with what he said. "Lucas," Brooke said a little louder, stopping on the first step up.

"Yeah?"

"Don't—when you uh, call Nathan…"

"I won't tell him," Lucas reassured her.

Brooke nodded thankfully. "You can tell him about the uh…crash," she tried not to choke on the word. "But you can't…" she trailed off in a pleading voice.

Lucas nodded in understanding.

"Thanks," she whispered before turning to go upstairs.

It took most of Brooke's energy to get herself up the stairs; the thoughts of crawling into her large and comfortable bed driving her forward.

It wasn't until she was walking down the hallway towards the master bedroom that she first passed a mirror. The reflection didn't exactly make her feel better. Her eyes were red and puffy, her hair was starting falling out of the bun she had put it in, and her eye make up had smudged enough to make her cringe.

She wiped under her eyes with the back of her hands; just enough to wipe away some of the black residue from her eyeliner. She sighed and headed for the bedroom; if her crying and confessions didn't scare Lucas away yet, a little bad makeup probably wouldn't either.

Downstairs Lucas spoke in hushed tones to his brother; trying to explain that he wouldn't be making it to dinner and trying to avoid his questions about Brooke at the same time. Lucas had realized that Nathan had known Matt since he was a little kid, and telling Nathan that he was dead was not something to be done over the phone.

After hanging up on Nathan, Lucas quickly made his way upstairs and to the doorway of Brooke's room. He stopped short at the door, seeing that Brooke was already curled up under the covers and sleeping. If it was possible, she looked even more vulnerable in her sleep; her body was still tense and she had protectively wrapped the covers around her.

Lucas quietly crept into the en-suite bathroom, figuring that the crying would give her one hell of a headache when she woke up and she would want some aspirin. He opened the cabinet slowly hoping not to make any noise, and scanned its contents. It had pretty much what he had expected…except one item. The item that sat right next to the aspirin he was looking for.

Lucas hesitated, but decided to pick up the container of prescription pills and examine them. Reading 'Xanax' label for Brooke P. Davis across the front, Lucas was suddenly a lot more worried about Brooke than he had been before. He let out his breath in slight relief when he saw that the prescription was filled two weeks ago but the bottle hadn't been opened. At least not yet.

Although she had just confessed her family's biggest secret to him, Lucas knew that he was still in no place to ask her about this. So he put the bottle back, grabbed two aspirin and left the bathroom.

He placed the aspirin, along with a small bottle of water, on the nightstand next to her.

Now he didn't really know what to do. His mind was racing with thoughts of what she just told him, so sleeping like her wasn't really an option. He knew how creepy it would be to watch her sleep, so he opted for sitting out on the balcony that was attached to the room.

Looking out over the extensive grounds in the back of the house, Lucas sat in one of the two comfortable chairs and put his feet up on the railing as he tried to absorb everything he had just learned.

Now his issues with Dan really didn't seem like that big of a deal.

* * *

Two hours later Brooke slowly opened her eyes and groaned at the pain that accompanied it. Her eyes were more than sore and the headache that pulsed through her head made it feel like she had a major hangover.

She looked around the room, searching for Lucas, but didn't find him. Flopping back onto the pillows, she sighed, assuming that he had left.

She reached over to her nightstand for her cell phone but was surprised when she felt a bottle of water instead. Turning to see what it was, Brooke found the two white pills and a note accompanying it.

_"Figured you'd want some aspirin. I'm downstairs making dinner if you feel like getting up. –Lucas"_

Brooke smiled softly, and took the pills in front of her. She slowly got up and made her way into the bathroom, groaning at her reflection as soon as it came into view.

After running a brush through her hair, putting it back up and splashing some water on her face, Brooke deemed herself fairly presentable and made her way downstairs.

"Hey," Brooke said softly from the doorway of the kitchen.

Lucas turned around from his place at the stove and smiled at her.

"Welcome back sleeping beauty," he grinned at her, trying to lighten the mood a little. He was pleased when he earned a light chuckle from her. "I didn't wake you, did I?" Lucas asked, his voice changing to worry.

Brooke laughed a little again. "No," she said truthfully. It was now eight o'clock and it was her hunger that woke her up. "Smells good in here," she said and approached him at the stove curious as to what he made with the limited ingredients in the house.

"Homemade macaroni and cheese," he told her grinning proudly.

"Homemade?" Brooke asked, impressed.

"Yep," Lucas said getting lost in her eyes for a moment before turning back to the pot in front of him. "My specialty," he added light heartedly.

"So uh, how are you doing?" Lucas asked quietly, hoping that he wouldn't upset her.

"Much better now," Brooke said honestly.

"Good," Lucas said smiling again.

Brooke found that she already loved that smile.

Brooke watched as Lucas pulled out two bowls and served them both.

"How are you still here?" Brooke asked as she watched Lucas sit down at the kitchen table.

Lucas looked at her and tilted his head to the side. "It's easy," he smiled. "I just didn't walk out the door."

Brooke laughed and shook her head. "Not what I meant."

"I know," Lucas said, watching her as she took her seat.

"You're a guy, shouldn't you be running for the hills with all of the emotions I was laying out earlier?"

Lucas chuckled heartedly. "Probably. In fact I normally would, but uh, I guess I didn't feel the need to run with you."

"Wow, you really know how to make a girl feel special," Brooke's voice dripped of playful sarcasm even though she really was flattered.

"I'm serious," Lucas said, losing the playful tone.

"Let me guess, you not a relationship type of guy?"

"Actually no, I am," Lucas said.

"Then what is it?"

"You really want to know?"

"Yeah," Brooke said. "I mean I've spilled enough about me to last the whole summer, so it's time for you to spill again."

Lucas took a deep breath and a bite of his food before speaking.

"You remember how I told you that at school I was expected to be this kinda…"

"Man-whore?" Brooke suggested.

Lucas laughed a little. "Yeah, I guess. Anyway, one night I was so fed up with Dan that I finally decided to get out of the house and go to a party with Nathan. Once I got there I was offered a drink and pretty soon I was drinking at every party as a way to numb everything else. When that stopped working I thought a different fling every week would do the trick."

"Thought?" Brooke asked, referring to his use of the past tense.

"Yeah, I put an end to my man-whorish ways two weeks ago."

"What, you have an epiphany or something?"

"Or something," Lucas said fairly cryptically. "I was with this girl on a Friday night. She was from the next town over or something so we couldn't go back to her place like I would usually do when I was staying at my mother's for the weekend. She asked if we could go to mine, but I didn't want her there. I didn't want a fling at my mother's house. When I was there I wanted to be the good person that she had raised; I wanted to bring a girl home that I could be proud of, not some fling I wouldn't remember the next morning. So I decided that in order to be the person my mom wanted me to be all of the time instead of just when I was at her house, then I'd have to stop the one night stands."

"Inspiring story," Brooke said after a moment of taking it all in. She was impressed. By everything really; the boy, the food, and the story."

"Thanks," Lucas said, slightly embarrassed at it all. "So what about you?"

"Me?"

"Yeah, what's your relationship story?"

"Subtle," Brooke told him of his ways of asking her if she had a boyfriend. "Dated a few guys, but it was more…physical than emotional if you know what I mean."

"Not looking for anything more than that?" Lucas asked, relieved that she didn't have a boyfriend.

"I am, but back home I haven't found anyone worthy of even attempting a real relationship with."

Lucas nodded. "I understand."

They were silent for a minute while they ate, but eventually they got back into small talk. They talked mostly about their schools and social lives, trying to stay away from the heavy emotional topics that they went through earlier that evening.

They had been sitting at the kitchen table talking for about a half hour when Lucas' phone vibrated, interrupting them.

"This is starting to become an unfortunate trend," Lucas said as he pulled out his cell phone.

"Nathan again?" Brooke asked.

"No it's my mom. I told Nathan to tell her that I'd be missing dinner but I don't think she expected me to still be gone now."

"Oh, then you should go," Brooke told him, standing up from her seat.

"It's okay," Lucas started but Brooke cut him off.

"You should go be with your mom," Brooke said, understanding already how important his time with her was. "I'll be fine," she added.

"You sure?" Lucas asked, not meaning to baby her, but he was concerned.

"Yes," Brooke answered confidently.

"Okay," Lucas said softly as he stood at the front door.

Surprising both of them, Lucas pulled Brooke into a tight hug and rested his chin on her head for a moment before releasing her.

"I'll see you soon," he whispered then left.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review.**

**-OTHfan326 **


	5. Peanut Butter and Jelly

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks so much for the incredible reviews last chapter!**

**I must give my sincerest apologies to everyone. I said this chapter would be up on Friday, and it's clearly not Friday. I had so much work this week that i had no time to write, and then of course dinner with friends on Friday turned into a three day celebration of it being spring break, giving me no time to write. So again, I'm so sorry.  
**

**The next few chapters of this story have already been planned out (although I'm still open to suggestions) so writing them won't take very long. I'll start the next one tomorrow, so it'll be up very soon (I'm not going to say when anymore because I don't want to disappoint when I can't post by then). **

**Enjoy**

* * *

This was possibly one of the most frustrating feelings Brooke knew. The one where everything shoulders up couldn't move, but everything below that was restless. All she wanted to do was go back to sleep but her restless legs wouldn't let her.

Groaning slightly into the pillow she willed her eyes open. After blinking out the sleep for a few seconds, she squinted to see the clock on her nightstand. Seeing the time she sighed and rolled onto her back.

She knew why she slept so well. And she knew that she now owed Rachel a phone call.

A half an hour later it was pushing noon and Brooke still hadn't worked up the courage to dial her best friend's number. Brooke picked the phone up off the kitchen table from where it had been staring back at her, pushed her chair out from the table and walked to the door.

Fresh air. The warm summer air hit her full force as soon as she opened the front door. The sun caused her to squint and take an involuntary step back. Looking down to avoid the sun for a few more seconds, Brooke saw a thin white envelope sitting on her porch.

Quickly opening the letter and skipping to the end, Brooke found that the note was signed by Lucas.

_"Hey, just out for my morning run and I think you're still sleeping, so a note will have to do. I'll be locked in my room studying all weekend, but I want to see you soon. No, you didn't scare me away. In fact, how does Monday afternoon sound? Call me if you need anything at all. –Lucas"_

Brooke smiled softly at the note and put it back into the envelope. She sat down on the first step of the porch and silently thanked it for still being covered by the shade.

Slowly, almost reluctantly, Brooke dialed Rachel's number, and after waiting three impossibly long rings, the redhead answered.

"Brooke?" she asked immediately

"Hey," Brooke replied, smiling at the sound of her best friend's voice. "What's up?" Simple enough start.

"Well if this wasn't the first time I've heard from you in far too long I'd actually be mad at you for waking me up so early on a Saturday."

"Rach, it's noon."

"Yeah, but school's out, bitch. No work to worry about means a hell of a lot more parties to go to."

Brooke rolled her eyes agreed with a muttered 'whatever'.

"So how are things back home?" Brooke asked, changing her tone to a lighter one.

"Good. You know, the usual," Rachel said nonchalantly."Bevin's an idiot, Adam's horny and asking for you, and everyone else is pretty wasted."

"You make it all seem so glorious," Brooke said; her voice dripping in sarcasm.

"One of my many talents," Rachel insisted. "Not that I'm not beyond happy and relieved to finally hear from you, but cut to the chase and tell me what's up with you."

Brooke took a deep breath, not really sure how to start.

"I'm okay," she tried starting with.

"Okay?"

"Yeah, this was definitely the right decision, but you and I both know that everything won't disappear just because I'm living somewhere else for a while."

"Yeah," Rachel let out as she sighed.

"But uh, I…" Brooke trailed off, struggling with her next words.

"Brooke?" Rachel's voice piped up with concern.

"Last night…" Brooke hesitated again. "You see there's this guy, Lu—"

"Shit, Brooke!" Rachel exclaimed into the phone, not allowing Brooke to continue. "Brooke you can't resort to stuff like that," Rachel chastised Brooke for the assumed one night stand.

"It's not what you think, Rach," Brooke insisted.

"Then what is it?" Rachel asked using a tone that Brooke loathed; the tone that conveyed the worry; the tone that made it sound like she couldn't take care of herself.

"I met this guy, Lucas," Brooke repeated. "It's really not what you think, okay? He's actually pretty amazing," Brooke smiled softly, thinking of Lucas.

"It turns out that I used to know his brother and one of his best friends," Brooke continued. "I ran into them yesterday and they started asking questions and I freaked to I left, but uh, Lucas came to talk to me and…well I told him."

"Told him?"

"Everything."

"What!"

"I know," Brooke slouched down in slight shame. "I know I probably shouldn't have told him that stuff, but I needed to. I needed to tell someone."

"You could have talked to me, Brooke."

"It's not the same," Brooke said softly, immediately feeling bad for the hurt she probably just caused her friend. "I know I can always talk to you, but this was different."

Rachel stayed silent for a minute, contemplating what to say next.

"So what happened after you told him?" She asked quietly but curiously.

"He was amazing about it."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"That's great, B, but why does it sound like there's more to this story?"

"Because there is."

"So I ask again, what happened next?"

"It felt so good to tell him and talk about it all and just get it all out there, but then when he left I was sitting there replaying the whole thing in my head over and over again and I started feeling guilty for telling him so much. That made think about way too much at that point and I started getting angry and my mind was racing and…" Brooke trailed off.

Silence. On both ends of the line. Brooke didn't know how to tell Rachel what she wanted to say next, and Rachel didn't know how to ask the question where she was slightly afraid of the answer.

"How many?" Rachel finally asked so quietly that it was almost inaudible.

Brooke felt her throat tighten suddenly but she willed the tears away. 

"Just half of one," Brooke's voice cracked as she spoke. "It was just to relax me, nothing more, okay? It was a one time thing," Brooke insisted desperately.

"Brooke," Rachel sighed."I'm just worried, okay?"

"I know, I know," Brooke mumbled. She had scared herself the night before when she made a conscious decision to open that bottle.

It started early in the school year; one Xanax every so often when the stress or the constant anxiety became too much. But then Matt died. And then what had been a hard time fall asleep turned into not being able to sleep at all. Then an anxiety attack here and there when she had a test that she had to do well on, turned into one every time she had to go home.

Half a pill became one pill and one pill become two pills and eventually Rachel caught on.

It was an ugly confrontation, to say the least. There was yelling and crying and definitely a few withdrawal symptoms, but Rachel got her through it. 

"Brooke," Rachel said quietly. "Please don't take them again."

"Rach," Brooke started, knowing that she couldn't promise anything.

"Please don't take them again," Rachel repeated in a more pleading voice.

Brooke held her breath for a moment in hopes that it would push back the urge to cry.

"I'm sorry, I gotta go.I'll call you soon," Brooke said, blinking back the tears.

"Brooke!"

"Bye Rach," Brooke said quietly and hung up the phone.

* * *

Lucas sat at his desk chair with his feet on the edge of the desk, pushing backwards so that his chair was on its hind legs and he could easily stare at the ceiling. Of course, Brooke was on his mind. 

"You know," Lucas sat up straight and turned his head at the sound of his mother's voice in the doorway."Studying might be more effective if you actually look at your books."

"Ha-ha," Lucas deadpanned.

"What's on your mind kiddo?" Karen asked as she sat on his bed.

"Kiddo?"

"Just answer the question."

Lucas rolled his eyes but complied and answered.

"Brooke."

Karen sighed. "I figured."

"How's that?"

"You're a little obvious," Karen understated it and Lucas chuckled a little. "Do you like her?"

"Yeah, actually," Lucas admitted. "But I don't think anything will come of it."

"Why's that?"

"She's got a lot going on right now, and I'm not really sure if any type of relationship fits into the picture."

"You never know…"

"Yeah, I guess," Lucas shrugged, thinking that even if nothing happened between him and Brooke, he still wanted to get to know her and help her more. "Anyway, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at the café?"

"Deb's there now, I was just dropping off some lunch for you all."

"All?"

"Your friends are in the kitchen."

"Of course," Lucas muttered."I should get out there."

"Yes," Karen agreed as they stood. "I'll be back in a few hours," she said before leaving through the side door of his room.

Lucas grabbed some of his books from his bed and made his way out to the kitchen where he found Nathan, Haley, Peyton, and Jake all eating sandwiches while studying for Monday's final. In addition to their English papers being due that day, they had either their French or Spanish finals that day too. Nathan and Haley both took French so they were at one end of the table while Peyton and Jake took Spanish so they were studying at the other end. Lucas sighed as he sat down in the middle and took out his books, determined to study on his own and not get between the two couples; or at least one couple and one should-be-couple.

"Hey man," Nathan was of course the first to look up from his books.

"Hey," Lucas said as he reached for a sandwich and a can of soda from the middle of the table. After taking a massive bite from his sandwich, Lucas finally looked up to find four inquisitive sets of eyes staring back at him.

"What?" He asked, his voice muffled by the food in his mouth.

"What?" Peyton asked incredulously. "What do you mean 'what'?"

"Dude," Nathan cut in."What happened with Brooke yesterday?"

That's when Lucas lost his appetite.Just thinking about telling them about Matt was enough ruin whatever mood he was in. Thinking about what Brooke had gone through in the past year was enough to make him sick. So he threw his sandwich back down onto his plate and pushed it away. He forced himself to chew and swallow before he readjusted his position in his chair in preparation of dropping the big news.

"Okay," he started."This isn't exactly good news, so you may want to brace yourself." Now instead of just curious, everyone was curious and worried. "Matt uh, Matt died in a car accident two months ago."

"What?" Nathan exclaimed.

"Are you kidding me?" Peyton also said, astonished. It was meant to be rhetorical, but Lucas had to bite back with sarcasm.

"Does it sound like I'm kidding?" Lucas retorted. "Sorry," he said softly. "When you guys asked her about him she didn't know what to say."

"Which is why she just left," Peyton mumbled, sitting back in her seat.

Nathan just sat motionless for a few seconds. He and Matt used to play every sport imaginable together. Greg loved to run, but he and Matt loved team sports. Matt knew how much basketball pressure Nathan was under, so he was always there to play another sport; soccer, baseball, tennis, lacrosse. Matt played them all including basketball, but he always knew when Nathan needed a taste of something else. The guy was like a big brother to Nathan for years.

"Is Brooke okay?" Haley asked. "I mean, obviously she's not, but…"

"She couldn't take living at home because her parents had completely fallen apart, so she came here for the summer. She's had one hell of a year and she's finally trying to pick up the pieces."

"Her parents just let her come down here?" Jake asked.

"They don't know," Lucas said fiddling with the soda can in his hands. "Only her best friend knows where she is. Everyone else just assumes that she's at a summer program or something like that."

Lucas took a deep breath as everyone around him tried to absorb what he had just told them.

"Look," Lucas started again, "Brooke's incredible. She's been unbelievably strong and mature about everything that's been going on, and the last thing she wants is pity, so my suggestion for right now is just to get back to work and we'll talk more about this later."

Everyone nodded and went back to work. Lucas leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes for a minute, worrying about Brooke before he willed himself back to his books for a long day of studying.

* * *

Why does that always happen? Why is it that the second that you're ready to go do something, another thing stops you? Why is it that the moment Brooke's hand touched the glass of the sliding door, the doorbell rings?

She was all ready to spend later part of Sunday afternoon out on one of the hammocks, unwinding with a great book, but of course the doorbell had to ring at that moment.

Groaning, Brooke turned away from the sunny backyard and headed to the front door.

As soon as she opened the door she knew they knew. 

It was the look in their eyes and the way they were standing that told Brooke that Lucas had broken the news to Nathan and Peyton. Part of her was relieved that she wouldn't have to tell them, but part of her wishes no one knew so that she could just pretend that it never happened.

"Hey," Brooke said softly.

For a few moments they stood there in a painfully awkward silence; no one really knew what to say.

But the Peyton took the first step forward and it was less than a half a second from there that she and Brooke were hugging tightly. Then Nathan stepped up and took the two girls into his arms.

"Come on," Brooke mumbled and led them both inside.

"How are you holding up?" Peyton asked, trying not to directly talk about Matt.

Brooke just shrugged."I'm not really sure how to answer that one."

"So what did you do this weekend?" Nathan asked.

"Well I _was_ going to go relax outside, but _someone_ just_ had_ to come and visit," Brooke said, looking at Nathan who just rolled his eyes, relieved to see that Brooke hadn't changed that much.

"But seriously," Brooke continued. "Not much. I mean I got cable and wireless internet installed and that's about it."

"Well those are the essentials to living," Peyton joked.

"I think so," Brooke retorted. "But it's been quiet, and that's what I want."

"So how's life with you two?" Brooke asked.

"Good," they both responded without much emotion.

"Right," Brooke rolled her eyes. "So P.Sawyer, I hear you're practically shacking up with that Jake Jagielski!"

"Oh god," Peyton groaned, realizing that Lucas had told her about everyone.

"Don't worry, you can give me all the dirty details when Nate's not here," Brooke said. "Speaking of Nathaniel, I hear you have a _major_ crush on Haley James."

"Luke really can't keep his mouth shut, can he?" Nathan asked.

"Well?" Brooke ignored his comment. "Why haven't you asked her out?"

Nathan shrugged, clearly uncomfortable discussing it.

"Do me a favor?" Brooke asked sweetly. "Make a move by the end of the week, clearly you two have been waiting long enough, and trust me, you don't want to wait too long or take these things for granted."

Peyton and Nathan nodded in understanding as the three looked out on the backyard from the porch.

"I can practically see us out there," Peyton said.

Nathan looked out into the distance. "You mean the water balloon and shaving cream fights?" Nathan smirked.

Brooke giggled and rolled her eyes. "I think those stopped the summer Greg broke his arm slipping on the shaving cream."

"What about the time Nathan ended up with a bloody nose after getting hit with a Frisbee?" Peyton said and the two girls laughed as Nathan shook his head in embarrassment.

"Hey, remember PJ?" Nathan asked suddenly.

"Yeah!" Peyton agreed, wondering where the Davis' lively yellow lab when.

"He was awesome," Brooke said. "You know I remember the day we got him?"

"Seriously?

"Yeah. It's weird since I was only four, but it's one of those memories that I seemed to have held on to," Brooke said, smiling as she remembered.

_Thirteen years ago…_

_"Mattie, No!" Four year old Brooke Davis yelled. "Stop! Please, Mattie!" She yelled out, dimples in full blast as fits of laughter erupted._

_"Matthew Robert," a playfully stern voice came from the kitchen doorway and an 11 year-old Matt finally released his tickling grip on his little sister._

_"Grandma!" Brooke yelled as she caught her breath. She jumped off of her chair and ran straight into the arms of her grandmother, Matt following close behind for a hug as well._

_"Hey babies," Sophia cooed as she held them tight. "Where's mommy and daddy?" she asked the two children._

_"Mom's unpacking and dad's on the phone," Matt replied as his picked up Brooke and set her back in her chair at the kitchen counter. "How come Greg and Laura aren't here?"_

_"There are going to be here in two weeks, but until then, I've got you all to myself," Sophia smiled as she ruffled Matt's hair; an action which the 11 year old boy had failed to duck away from._

_"Soph!" They heard a deep voice call from the other room._

_"In the kitchen, Max!" she yelled back, and sure enough a few seconds later, a tall older man walked through the door of the kitchen._

_"Grandpa!" Brooke yelled and got ready to jump off her seat again. Matt made a quick move and grabbed the excited four year old before she could run anywhere again._

_"Hey there Brookie," Max said smiling as he walked over and Brooke jumped into his arms. "Jeeze Matt, what kind of sugar did you feed this one on the way down here?"_

_"Don't look at me!" Matt said with his hands up in surrender before hugging his grandfather_

_"Guess what we have for you," Max said as he set Brooke back down in her chair._

_"Presents?" Brooke asked with wide eyes._

_"Yep," Max said as he exited the room for a moment, only to come back with a puppy yellow lab._

_"No way!" Matt yelled as Max handed him the puppy._

_"It's a puppy!" Brooke squealed as she dropped her peanut butter and jelly sandwich back onto the plate so that she could greet the newest edition to the household._

_"What's his name?" Matt asked._

_"That's up to you," Sophia told him. "You two get to name him."_

_"What'd ya think we should name him?" Matt asked Brooke who was reaching her hands up to be licked by the dog. She thought the dog loved her already, but Matt knew that the dog was probably just licking off the peanut butter that was still on her hands._

_Brooke pulled her hands back and looked around the room for a minute before turning back to Matt with a grin on her face._

_"Peanut butter and jelly!" She said proudly._

_Matt just rolled his eyes as their grandparents shared a laugh._

_"Be serious, Brookie," he told her._

_Brooke frowned with a hint of anger and calmed herself before speaking again._

_"Peanut butter and jelly," she said in a serious voice._

_This time Matt couldn't help but to laugh._

_"PB and J, huh?" Matt asked as he readjusted the puppy to look at his face._

_"How about just PJ?" Matt asked. _

_"PJ!" Brooke squealed with happiness and threw her hands in the air; her voice was so high at the 'P' that Matt was sure only the dog had heard her._

_"I like it," Matt decided and held the dog closer._

_"What's going on in here?"_

_"Daddy!" Brooke squealed yet again; her energy never failing._

_"Brookie!" Robert matched her excitement and picked up his young daughter. _

_"Grandma and Grandpa got a puppy!" she said excitedly._

_"I can see that," Robert said smiling, revealing dimples that matched his daughter's. "You two really spoil them," he told his parents who laughed and left the room._

_"Guess what?" Brooke continued._

_"Matt, did you give her candy again?"_

_"No!" Matt insisted. "I'm going upstairs to show mom the dog."_

_"Guess what Daddy!" Brooke started again once Matt had left the room._

_"What?"_

_"I got to name him!"_

_"No way!"_

_"Yeah!"_

"God I missed this house," Nathan said, his voice brining Brooke out of her day dream.

"He means we missed _you_," Peyton corrected him.

"I missed you too," Brooke said as she pulled them in for another hug.

* * *

Brooke sat in her car and checked herself in the mirror for the 6th time in the last 5 minutes.It wasn't like Lucas was late; it was just that she had nothing else to do, so she actually showed up early.

She tore her eyes away from the mirror and looked towards the school. Lucas would be coming out from his final any minute and Brooke was definitely curious as to where he planned on taking her.

Staring at the school, Brooke wondered what it would be like to go there. She wondered what it would be like growing up in this town. She loved her life in New York, but sometimes it was a little too much to handle. But that's why she was here now; to get away from her regular life.

She looked for Lucas when she saw the doors open and kids running out of the school. It was only 10:30 in the morning, so she figured that most would be going back to bed. At least that's what she'd do. Grab a couple extra hours of sleep and then wake up to study the rest of the night for the final the next day.

She was so caught up looking for Lucas in the swarm of students that she didn't see him walking up to her on the other side of the car.

"Hi," she could see him mouth after he knocked on her window, scaring her half to death.

Brooke rolled the window down with her other hand still on her racing heart.

"Sorry, I finished early so I was coming from my coaches office," he said, pointing to the gym in the other direction.

"How'd it go? The final, I mean."

"Well…I hope," Lucas answered.

"Good. So where are we going today?"

"Well," Lucas said as he opened Brooke's car door. "I'm driving."

"Oh really?" Brooke said as she stepped out.

"Really."

"Are you at least going to tell me where we are going?" Brooke asked once Lucas had started driving away from the school.

"To my favorite place in the whole town," Lucas told her. "Hey, can I put on some music?" He asked, seeing that her ipod was plugged into the stereo.

"Sure, what do you like to listen to?" Brooke asked as she turned on her ipod.

Lucas though for a moment, keeping his eyes on the road before he turned to Brooke to speak.

"Play a song that makes you happy."

Brooke rolled her eyes at his corniness and not-so-subtle attempt at cheering her up, but she also smiled at his thoughtfulness.

"Got a song?" Lucas asked.

"Yeah," Brooke said.

"Alright, play it," Lucas said as he turned the volume up so that they would be able to hear it when they got out of the car.

"Okay," Brooke said softly and pressed play.

As soon as the first bars of the song played through the speakers, Lucas smiled widely and turned to Brooke.

"What?"

"Stevie Wonder?" Lucas asked. 

_Music is a world within itself  
With a language we all understand  
With an equal opportunity  
For all to sing, dance and clap their hands  
But just because a record has a groove  
Don't make it in the groove  
But you can tell right away at letter A  
When the people start to move_

"Gotta love 'Sir Duke'" 

"Very true, but I have to say, I wasn't expecting this."

"Well what were you expecting?"

"I don't know," Lucas shrugged as he pulled to the side of the Rivercourt. "But definitely not Stevie Wonder."

"Well then I guess I'm just full of surprises," Brooke shrugged cutely.

"I guess so."

_They can feel it all over  
They can feel it all over people  
They can feel it all over  
They can feel it all over people_

"So why are we here?" Brooke asked as she watched Lucas walk to the center of the court and pick up a basketball.

"This," Lucas said as he looked around. "Is the Rivercourt."

Brooke turned as she slowly took in her surroundings; between the river, the park, and its hidden spot, Brooke could easily tell why he loved it.

"I basically grew up on this court," Lucas continued. "And now, it's kind of like a place for me to go to when it all becomes too much. It's the place where basketball is still a game that I love and not…not a sport; not a way of life."

_Music knows it is and always will  
Be one of the things that life just won't quit  
But here are some of music's pioneers  
That time will not allow us to forget  
For there's Basie, Miller, Sachimo  
And the king of all Sir Duke  
And with a voice like Ella's ringing out  
There's no way the band can lose_

Brooke nodded and smiled softly as she met him at the three point line.

Lucas smiled at her before turning and taking a shot; a perfect three pointer. Lucas smiled in accomplishment and went to retrieve the ball.When he turned back, Brooke was holding her hands out for the ball. Lucas tilted his head to the side slightly in surprise, but threw her the ball anyway.Much to his shock, Brooke caught the ball and set up for a shot. 

_You can feel it all over  
You can feel it all over people  
You can feel it all over  
You can feel it all over people_

"Damn," Brooke muttered when the ball bounced off the front of the rim.

"You play basketball?" Lucas asked, still in a little bit of shock. He definitely did not see that one coming. 

"Not really," Brooke said shaking her head.

"Then what was that?" Lucas asked as he retrieved the ball and they sat down on the bench. He was hoping for more of the really cheesy, stand behind her at the foul line and help her take a shot kind of thing.

"I idolized my older brother, so the Saturdays of the first ten years of my life were spent with him and my dad at his various athletic events."  
Lucas nodded, still a little surprised."I pictured you as more of a cheerleader type."

Brooke leaned back and laughed. "That's what everyone says, but my school doesn't even have a squad," Brooke told him."If it's any consolation I'm the president of the pep rally club."

"I can see that," Lucas said as he turned to face her. 

"What else can you see?"  
"I can see that you're actually a really happy person that's just going through a tough time."

The smile on Brooke's face fell slightly as the conversation turned serious.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because you smile when you talk about the things you love; like Matt and your school and your friends."

_You can feel it all over  
You can feel it all over people  
You can feel it all over  
You can feel it all over people_

Brooke nodded sadly.

"How about we keep this more upbeat and less serious?"

"Sounds good to me, but what do you suggest we do?" Lucas asked. 

Brooke thought for a moment and then turned to face him, her thoughts forgotten when she realized how close they were to each other.

Lucas watched her intently, trying to figure out what she was thinking; trying to figure out if she wanted to kiss him as badly as he wanted to kiss her.

So he took a chance.He caringly placed a hand on her cheek and leaned in.

It was soft and shy, but it was different. It was meaningful and passionate, and sitting alone at the Rivercourt kissing Lucas Scott seemed to be exactly what Brooke needed.

_They can feel it all over  
They can feel it all over people  
They can feel it all over  
They can feel it all over people_

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review.**

**-OTHfan326 **


	6. The Rainy Day

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks so much for the incredible reviews last chapter!**

**I cannot apologize enough for the long wait with this chapter. For some odd reason, I've been busier during break than I have been while school is actually in session. Between two-a-day softball practices, meeting friends, and all that stuff it's been kinda crazy. But I'm back now and with school starting again this will be the perfect way to procrastinate. Therefore, expect more updates. **

**I have the next two chapters totally planned out (although I'm definitely still open to suggestions), so once i find time to write, it'll be done fairly quick.**

**The song I use in the first part is "For What It's Worth" by Buffalo Springfield. It's a great song and it would probably help to understand the mood of the scene if you listen to it.**

**Lastly, I'm bumping this rating up to M, so watch out for the mature scene in the middle.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

Lucas almost had to laugh at himself as his step had a little extra pep to it as he make his way up the stairs of Brooke's porch. With the stress in this life recently, Lucas couldn't remember a time when he had been this lighthearted. Despite the threatening weather, he found himself happier with each hour that past. Climbing the stairs two at a time, Lucas eagerly approached the door but hesitated.

He had pushed the thought that had been bothering him in the car out of his head. Starting off with the kiss on Monday, things had just gotten better and better for him and Brooke. Tuesday after his history final he met Brooke and 'the other four' - as he now so affectionately referred to his friends as - at the café for lunch. After lunch the rest of their afternoon was spent walking around town; stopping far too many times just to kiss. True, it seemed fairly innocent and kind of over the top, but it felt right.

Then it only got better on Wednesday after his Physics final. He met Brooke at her house and they spent the warm afternoon on the hammock out back. While Lucas studied Brooke just flipped through magazines next to him. Even now Lucas laughed a little at the long winded explanation for why she still hadn't touched the school books or even regular books she brought down.

But today was a little different. After his math final this morning, he was more than relieved to have successfully completed his junior year of high school. The weight that had been lifted off of him after handing in his last final was enormous. His final was scheduled so early that day that he even had time afterward to go to the gym for a little one on one with Nathan before he was supposed to meet Brooke at the café. Brooke was supposed to be waiting for him there. But when she didn't show and she didn't answer her cell, Lucas decided to go find her. He had tried to convince herself that she had just slept really late or was out for a run and had forgotten about lunch, but in the back of his head he knew better.

That's why he hesitated at the door. He was worried about Brooke, but he was also scared of what he might find. Seeing Brooke so broken once was hard enough. In the past few days he had realized how full of life she was, and he wasn't sure how well he'd handle seeing her break down again.

The rational part of his mind told him that it would only be natural for Brooke to break down again. Just because she did it once didn't mean that was out of her system. He knew that there it wouldn't all be up hill from there. He knew that there would be days where whatever progress she had made with him to move on seemed to disappear.

The optimist in him just said that he was over thinking the whole situation. And even though the optimist was the prominent though in his head at the moment, the rational part was what prepared him as he finally knocked on the door.

No answer.

He knocked again.

No answer.

Now he was worried.

Taking a chance, Lucas turned the door knob. He couldn't tell if the door being unlocked made him more worried that something was wrong, or relieved that he could go in.

"Brooke?" Lucas called out but didn't get an answer. He walked fully into the house and closed the door behind him. "Brooke?" He called again but didn't get an answer.

He walked tentatively into the kitchen and then the living room, the soft music he could hear was getting louder as he moved further into the extensive house.

_There's somethin' happening here_

_What it is, ain't exactly clear._

_There's a man with a gun over there;_

_Tell me, I've got to beware_

Lucas finally found Brooke, and the source of the music, sitting on the floor against a couch in a room in the back corner of the house. She was sitting Indian style and seemed to be focused on all of the pictures that surrounded her. Staring at her for a moment, Lucas realized that she was a pretty huge cliché; gloomy day, depressing mood.

"Brooke?" Lucas asked softly.

_I think it's time stop_

_Children, what's that sound?_

_Everybody look what's going down._

Brooke's head shot up in surprise.

"Lucas," she mumbled and made a move to get up but Lucas stopped her and moved to sit next to her. "I'm sorry I really forgot about today. I guess I just lost track of time."

"Don't worry about it," Lucas told her. "But what happened?"

Brooke shrugged but decided to explain anyway.

_There's bad lines being drawn;_

_Nobody's right if everybody's wrong._

_Young people speakin' their minds,_

_Are getting' so much resistance_

_From behind._

"I woke up and it was kinda gross out," Brooke said, referring to the morning rain which seemed to momentarily subside. "So I stayed in, but there's only so many hours of morning show TV I can handle, so I came in here hoping to make some progress on the albums, and kinda lost track of time."

Lucas nodded. "Brooke?" He asked softly. "What is all of this?"

_I think it's time we stop_

_Hey, what's that sound?_

_Everybody look what's going down._

"This," Brooke said as she picked up a picture and handed it to him, "is Matt."

Lucas looked down at the picture and saw Matt in a cap and gown and a slightly younger Brooke in a summer dress.

"That was his college graduation," Brooke said softly. "I'm trying to put all of our great memories and stuff into albums so that I can always find them, you know?"  
Lucas nodded and placed the picture back down in the pile it came from then picked another one up. "Are these you're parents?" Lucas asked of a picture from that same day.

"Yep," Brooke said.

"Are you close with them?" Lucas asked, slightly entranced by the memories that were captured and laid out before him. He could see ones of them at the beach here in Tree Hill, ones at New York throughout what was presumably their apartment, ones at Matt's athletic events, and many more.

_What a field day for the heat;_

_A thousand people in the street._

_Singin' songs and they're carrying sings,_

_Mostly say 'hooray' for our side._

"Matt was close with both of them," Brooke said. "A little more so with my mom, and then I was closer with my dad."

"What about you and your mom?"

"My mother drives me _crazy_," Brooke said, emphasizing the last word to show how serious she was.

"Why?"  
"Too many reasons," Brooke said, throwing her head back onto the couch. "But I really don't want to talk about that now."

"Okay," Lucas said understandingly.

_It's time we stop_

_Hey, what's that sound?_

_Everybody look what's going down._

"I have a question," Lucas started again.

"As away," Brooke said as she lifted her head back up to look at Lucas.

"What's with the music?" Lucas asked.

"Matt loved this song," Brooke said quietly.

"Oh."

"Yeah," Brooke let out a small sardonic laugh. "I listen to basically everything and so did Matt, but based on age and just what we were into at the time, we could never really agree on anything to listen to when we were in the car or something. Most of the time Matt would just end up putting on some of his favorite oldies and we'd both be happy."

Lucas smiled as he listened, watching as Brooke smiled subconsciously as she spoke.

_Paranoia strikes deep;_

_Into your life it will creep._

_It starts when you're always afraid;_

_Step out of line, the man comes_

_And takes you away._

Brooke closed her eyes and blocked out everything except the song.

_You better stop_

_Hey, what's that sound?_

_Everybody look what's going down._

_You better stop_

_Hey, what's that sound?_

_Everybody look what's going down._

_You better stop_

_Hey, what's that sound?_

_Everybody look what's going down._

_You better stop_

_Hey, what's that sound?_

_Everybody look what's going down._

Just as the music was fading out, Lucas looked around him once again and noticed that not only had it started to rain again in the few minutes since he had sat down with Brooke, but it was pouring.

The corners of his lips twitched up in a slight smile and he stood up from the floor, holding a hand out to Brooke to help her up.

"Come on," Lucas urged her.

"Where?" Brooke asked with suspicion as she took his hand.

"To have a little fun."

* * *

It had taken almost three minutes of pestering on the porch to get Brooke to step out into the rain. It was surprisingly the reserved Lucas who was trying to get the normally spontaneous brunette out into the rain.

She had tried to reason that that there was in fact no reason to go out and get soaked. She claimed she was wearing a perfectly good outfit and there was no apparent reason to ruin it. Lucas just rolled his eyes, bent down, threw Brooke over his shoulder, and headed out into the rain; much to Brooke's chagrin.

There was only a quick warning of 'hold your breath' before Lucas took a small jump and landed them both in the pool.

After a few seconds of splashing, Brooke had made sure that they moved to the hot tub instead of the regular pool. Because of the rain, the outside temperature had dropped fairly dramatically, and it was cooler then they had expected.

"What?" Lucas asked and Brooke snapped her attention back up to him, slightly embarrassed that she had just been caught staring at him as he lifted himself from the pool into the hot tub, watching as his muscles flex under his tight and now see-through white shirt.

"Nothing," Brooke mumbled as she turned her attention away from Lucas and towards the pool.

"What's on your mind?" Lucas asked after a few minutes of silence. Brooke pulled her eyes away from the water and turned to him. "You can tell me," Lucas said gently, noticing her hesitation.

"It's weird," Brooke started. "I love the feeling of being in the water, but I hate being in past my shoulders."

"Why?"

"Fear."

"Of what?" Lucas asked curiously.

"I used to never really be afraid of anything serious, but that faded pretty quickly," Brooke said. "So what started as a child's innocent fear of sharks in her grandmother's pool turned into a fear of literally being in too deep and that feeling of being helpless; of losing control."

Lucas watched her curiously and waited for her to continue, not really sure what he should say to her.

Brooke sighed before continuing and Lucas smiled slightly. He had already found that one of her habits was to take a deep breath and let it out in a sort of sigh whenever she was in deep thought.

"It used to be really superficial stuff; bugs, rollercoasters, that kind of stuff."

"But then?"

"Then it turned into far too many deeper things," Brooke continued with more passion. "Like being afraid of being in my home, of going to school on Monday mornings, of moving on from all of this, from not being able to move on, and what happens when I go back at the end of the summer." Brooke paused to regroup herself. "I'm afraid of having regrets and…" She trialed off, giving up on listing everything.

Lucas squinted slightly as he tried to understand how someone who seemed so full of life could fear so much.

"I never used to be like this," Brooke said quietly as she turned back to face Lucas. He could barely hear her above the pouring rain. "I used to just…go with the flow."

Lucas nodded for a moment but then stopped and started shaking his head with a small laugh.

"What's so funny?" Brooke asked, clearly not amused.

"You know this was supposed to be fun." Lucas said, referring to throwing her into the pool, "and somehow you turned it into a horribly seriously conversation."

Brooke glared at Lucas slightly with her mouth slightly opened in shock. Slowly her expression turned into one of agreement before a full laugh erupted as she realized how right he was.

"So how do you suggest we make this less serious?" Brooke asked.

"Well," Lucas said as he pulled Brooke into his lap so that she was straddling him. "I can think of one thing," he whispered; their faces inches apart.

Brooke quirked her eyebrow and spoke huskily, "just one thing?"  
Lucas smiled but shook his head as he leaned in and captured Brooke's lips in his own, sucking on her bottom lip for a moment before deepening it.

Lucas wrapped his arms around Brooke's waist while her hands found their way to the side of his neck; her thumbs gently brushing over his jaw.

Even tough Lucas and the warm water around her comforted Brooke, when a sudden wind swept through, they could not stop her from shivering slightly and pulling away.

"Let's go inside," she whispered.

Lucas nodded and silently followed her inside and upstairs, leaving a trail of wet footprints and water droplets along the way.

"Brooke?" Lucas murmured. He followed her into the large master bathroom and watched as she turned on the shower, figuring out that her mood had changed dramatically within that one kiss. "What are you doing?"  
"Taking a shower," Brooke replied with a carefree voice. "Are you going to join me?" She asked with a slightly darker one.

Lucas momentarily froze. Of course he wanted to join her, who the hell wouldn't? But he didn't know if he should.

"Give me a minute and I'll be right back," Lucas said quickly and exited the bathroom, leaving Brooke with a confused look. She shook it off though, not wanting to worry too much about anything at the moment.

She quickly stripped herself of the soaking clothes that stuck to her body and entered the shower, letting the hot water relax her for a moment before reaching for her body wash.

Outside the bathroom Lucas reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. It had dawned on him sometime between hitting the water and coming up for air that it was still in his pocket and therefore no longer working, but he ignored it and focused his attention back to Brooke. Now he shook it for any signs of life. He didn't really expect it to work, but it bought him some time before he headed back towards the shower where Brooke was waiting.

It wasn't at all that he didn't want to be in there with her, it was more his worry that everything was moving a little fast and what she wanted now was just a product of the clearly emotional day she had had.

Lucas shook of his thoughts and reentered the bathroom, leaving his now broken phone on the counter before stepping toward the shower. His flip flops had long since been discarded downstairs so he started by peeling his shirt of first and then pushing down his shorts and boxers.

When he opened the shower door, a rush of steam hit him, clearing within the shower, allowing him to see Brooke standing with her eyes closed and her head tilted back beneath the strong stream of water. Sensing the loss of heat, she opened her eyes and lifted her head back up to grin at Lucas, doing a quick and discreet once over of his body. The basketball had definitely paid off, Brooke though.

"Took you long enough," Brooke said with a smirk before he stepped to her, too amazed to speak. All he could think was that Brooke Davis was perfect.

It's somewhere in his thought's of Brooke's beauty that it dawn on him that he's never actually cared about a girl he's been this physical with. He watched silently as she hands him the shampoo and then steps back into the stream of water to wash out the remaining shampoo.

And as he pours the thick substance into his hand, he doesn't really care that it came from a pink bottle and probably smells like some sort of flower, because all he's doing right now is what Brooke's eyes are telling him as they stare at each other.

When Brooke looks down and then turns around, the smile on Lucas face falters and he watched her intently. He wipes the suds from his hair and they hit the marble floor with a splat, but Brooke doesn't flinch. She just stands there. Her arms are covering her full chest and her hands are at her collar bone, turned out so that they can catch the stream of water. He head is turned and titled off to the right so that the hot water doesn't hit her face directly and she just stares ahead. Lucas frowns slightly when he realized that she probably found herself in this quiet position many times, hoping that the water would wash away her problems.

So he raises his arms from his sides to reach out to her, but hesitates slightly. The gravity of his place in all of this hits him in a quick second. He's never actually cared for the girls he's been with, he thinks again. It made him a sort of heartless womanizer, but that was the truth. Brooke has been 'around'; she had told him herself. But the flash of insecurity her saw in her eyes when he stepped into the shower told him realize that she's probably never been this intimate either.

Shaking his head of all of the thoughts running rampant in his head, Lucas just told himself not to think.

And that's what he did. Even though it was against his nature to disregard everything that was _really_ going on, he did. So he took a step forward and wrapped his strong arms around Brooke's small waist and buried his face in her neck.

Brooke took an involuntary step forward, allowing Lucas to follow and fall under the stream of water. The water was nearly scalding against his cold skin, but Lucas couldn't feel it with his attention on the brunette in his arms.

Brooke reached out and pressed her hands against the wall in front of her, relaxing into Lucas' touch at the same time. Lucas is pretty sure that she can feel how hard he is against her, but she doesn't give any indication of this. Instead she turned around and gives him a gentle kiss that he barely has time to return before she's maneuvered her way out of his arms and reached for the bottle of conditioner.

She lathers the little bit between her hands for a few seconds before reaching back and quickly running her hands through her hair as she watches him watch her. Lucas is just standing under the water in a trace. The shampoo has long since been washed out of his hair but he makes no attempt to move until Brooke is ready to wash her hair out again. When he sees her take a small step towards him, he moves slightly so that he can pull her under the stream of water.

Lucas pulls her flush against him and has to close his eyes for a second before he regains control of his body and looks back down at her. She's watching him with only a hint of a smile playing across her lips; lips that Lucas bends down and captures with his own and runs his hands through her hair, helping to wash out the conditioner from her smooth hair.

And in a moment that neither of them can pinpoint, everything heats up. Suddenly the water isn't as hot as their bodies rubbing against each other. Suddenly their not aware of their actions; their hands and lips are moving without their minds' recognition because it just feels natural.

So when Lucas moves his hands to her waist and lifts her up, she doesn't even realized that he legs have wrapped around him until after the face. The only time they stop their frantic movement is when he feels Brooke tense in his arms and it's only because her back has been pressed up against the cold marble wall. Lucas finally pulls back to look at her to make sure that everything is okay.

"I'm okay," Brooke says as if reading his mind. "Keep going."

And he does. They both do. But this time is much slower; less lust and more of a deeper feeling. They're both afraid to even think of that daunting 'L-word' at this point because they've only known each other for a week and that's just absurd. But when Lucas pulls back again for a moment, their breath is deep and shaky, lips are swollen, and the deep attraction is so present at that moment that both can't help but to silently consider the thought.

"Keep going," Brooke whispers again but now Lucas' rational thought snaps back.

"Wait," he says with such concern it scares Brooke. "We, uh, I have no protection," Lucas stumbles out.

"You don't need it," Brooke blinks the water out of her eyes and says quietly. "I'm on the pill," she says almost shyly. And it's weird for her because she's never been shy about this stuff. She's always been outspoken about _everything_.

For a split second Lucas wonders why. She had told him that she broke up with her ex a few months ago and hasn't been with anyone since, so he wonders why she's still on the pill.

But then Brooke's lips are back on his. Then he slips inside of her. And from then on, all rational thought is lost.

They're back to not even realizing their movements because everything feels so right between them and they let instinct take over. Instinct that with every thrust brings them closer to ecstasy.

They don't know even know how long they've been in that position; Lucas standing with Brooke wrapped around him as he pressed her into the wall. They don't know because time doesn't seem to exist with them then. Nothing does except each other. At some point both the kisses and the touching and the thrusts had sped up and hardened; become more passionate. But neither knows when because time ceases to be a factor with them.

Brooke moans into Lucas' mouth and by the volume and intensity of it, Lucas knows she's close to the edge. He is too and Brooke probably knows it by his quickened movements.

Lucas moves his lips to that spot on her neck that he already knows she loves and begins to suck, eliciting another moan that she lets out so close to his ear that Lucas practically shivers.

What happens next feels so good that it's almost an out of body experience for both of them. They can practically see the scene unfolding before them and they can feel every last ounce of the arousal, friction, and passion, but at the same time they're barely conscious of what's going on.

Lucas can feel her clench around him and pull him closer with her legs. It takes one more thrust for her to let out a high pitch moan of 'Luke' and Lucas spills inside of her. His legs buckle slightly at the release, but he uses all his remaining strength to hold them both up. They stay in the same position for a few minutes, not longer moving but rather trying to calm their breathing and regain enough energy to stand on their own.

When Lucas finally slips out of out of Brooke and she sets her legs back down on the ground, he realizes how amazing what they had just done was; how incredible it was that they came together.

Brooke just smiles up at him, unbeknownst to him thinking the same thing, reaches to the side of them and turns off the water.

Lucas grabs them two towels and Brooke quickly wraps it around her in order to stay warm. She steps out of the shower and reaches for her brush first, running it through her hair for a few seconds before she sees Lucas with a towel around his waist behind her in the mirror.

She turned to him and smiles. They're both a little stunned at not only the incredible sex they just had against the shower wall, but the fact that they haven't really said much to each other and they're still comfortable with that.

Before either of them could even attempt to break the silence the doorbell broke them out of their thoughts and by the three consecutive rings they figured that the person had been their for a while but they didn't hear the disturbance with the water running.

Brooke furrowed her brow slightly in confusion.

"I'll get it," Lucas offered, figuring that Brooke wouldn't want to answer the door a towel. The cocky side of Lucas didn't mind doing it at all.

Brooke nodded, "Thanks," she said before he turned to leave.

Lucas stopped at the door of the bathroom, realizing that his quick move to leave probably made it seem like he wanted to get out of there and that was the last thing he wanted to do, so he turned around and placed a quick but lingering kiss on Brooke's lips before heading downstairs.

While Lucas headed downstairs Brooke stayed behind, quickly applying lotion and finding some clothes to wear before heading downstairs. She could hear voices downstairs and as she got closer she recognized the second one as Nathan's.

"Dude," she could hear Nathan say. "You smell like a girl."

Brooke smiled, knowing that he had used her shampoo. She stopped high enough on the stairs so that they wouldn't be able to see her there.

"I know," Lucas said smugly and Brooke could imagine the grin on his face.

Brooke could hear silence for a second before Nathan started laughing.

"You gonna keep laughing all afternoon or tell me what you came here for?" Lucas asked. Nathan was definitely surprised to see Lucas answer Brooke's door in a towel. Once he recovered from the initial shock, it wasn't hard to figure out what had gone on between the two when no one was around.

"Sorry," Nathan choked out as he tried to calm himself. "I tried calling a bunch of times but you're phones off."

"Ohhhh," Lucas laughed slightly. "It's broken."

"What?"

"Yeah, I kinda jumped into the pool with it."

"Ohhhh," Nathan was the one who said it this time.

"Yeah, so what'd you need?"

"Right," Nathan started but stopped when he saw Brooke emerge from the staircase. "So there's the other half."

Lucas turned and saw Brooke approached them after coming out from her hiding place on the stairs. She was wearing simple grey cotton shorts and a big worn Yankees t-shirt, but Lucas still couldn't get over how beautiful and sexy she looked to him. Nathan could easily tell his brother's thoughts so he cleared his throat and regained Lucas' attention.

"Nathan," Brooke said, ignoring his comment. "What can we help you with today?"

"Daddy called," Nathan said, hatred dripping from his voice. "Since my mom's taking him away tomorrow he insists that we all have dinner tonight to talk to us about tomorrow."

Lucas rolled his eyes and Brooke noticed how his shoulders sank in dread.

"What time?" Lucas asked.

"Six," Nathan said. "Early dinner, but if I were you, I'd show up earlier than that."

Lucas nodded. "Are you going back to the gym until then?" Lucas asked.

"Nah, I'm going to meet Haley at the studio," Nathan said coolly; a tone Lucas was glad to hear. Nathan had convinced Haley to pursue her talent in music last summer, and since then she's been working with Chris Keller down at the local studio. Nathan didn't like Keller to say the least, but after much convincing on Haley's part, Nathan is _civil_ to him.

"Okay," Lucas said a little skeptically. He knew that nothing was going on between Haley and Chris, but Nathan could get very protective of Haley.

"Yeah," Nathan said, eyeing Lucas. "I'm gonna go," he said and turned to leave.

"See you tomorrow, Brooke," Nathan nodded to her before he left.

"Tomorrow?" Brooke asked of his assumption.

"Right, I forgot to ask," Lucas mumbled.

"Ask me what?" Brooke said cheerily as she took his hand and led him back towards the stairs.

"Tomorrow's the charity basketball game the school holds," Lucas explains. "It's basically a chance for all the guys on the team to show off which is why Deb takes Dan away. If he was here and he saw the game he would freak at us for not taking it seriously. That's what he wants to see us tonight, so he can give us so stupid speech about whatever the hell goes on in his twisted head."

Brooke raised her eyebrows.

"Yeah," Lucas said, noticing her expression. "But it's fun for us. And now to the point," he continued as they walked up the stairs. "Since Haley's not on the squad like Peyton is, she wanted to know if you wanted to go to the game with her. It's tomorrow at six, and then Nate and I are throwing a party at the beach house."

"Sounds exciting," Brooke said and flashed him a dimpled smile. "Count me in."

"Good," Lucas smiled. "So what do you suggest we do now?" He asked when they reached her bedroom once again.

"Well it's a rainy day," Brooke said motioning out the window where it was still pouring. "And what's better to do on a rainy day than stay in bed all day?"

Lucas grinned and pulled her down onto the soft bed, kissing her as soon as they landed.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review. I'm begging you to review.  
**

**-OTHfan326 **


	7. Too Attached

**Hey, I'm reposting this because the first time it didn't show up on the list as having a new chapter, so anyone who didn't have it on their alerts would see it. Sorry for the confusion for those of you who thought this was ANOTHER chapter tonight. If you already read it, thanks, but you don't have to read it again because I didn't change anything.**

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks so much for the incredible reviews last chapter! There were 30!! That's the most I've ever gotten and I can't thank you enough for that.  
**

**I'm so unbelievably sorry for making you all wait so long. School's been a bitch in the past two weeks. That combined with practice and the rest of my life left me no time to breath, let alone write.**

**It definitely won't take that long again. I can't make any promises for when I'll update next, but it won't take nearly that long.**

**This chapter doesn't have too much drama so the scenes in it might seem a little rushed and not as detailed as my other ones in this fic, but the end sets up for next chapter which will be VERY big and important.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

"So explain to me why the whole freaking town is here tonight," Brooke said with her voice raised so that it could reach Haley over the cheering, even though Haley was sitting next to her.

Haley smirked as she pulled her eyes away from Nathan warming up on the court and towards Brooke.

"I don't know, some weird tradition I guess," Haley said. "It's like one of those movies except not as depressing…most of the time."

Brooke laughed, realizing that Haley was kidding at the end. The two had gotten to know each other better that day at the mall. With the guys setting up for the party and Peyton and the other cheerleaders setting up for the charity game, Haley, who's not involved in the event, went to find Brooke and see what she was doing, knowing that she was alone.

Brooke was relieved and happy to see Haley at her door that morning. Despite having a great time with her throughout the whole day, since her arrival that morning, Brooke had a few thoughts plaguing her. One of which was whether or not she was starting to get too attached to Lucas.

That morning it hadn't even been 24 hours since she last saw him; not even a day and she already didn't know what to do without him. She had been in Tree Hill for a little over a week and was closer to Lucas than any other guy before him.

Earlier Haley had asked her what she thought she was going to do this summer once she arrived in Tree Hill. That was when Brooke realized how different everything was from what she had intended. She had never intended to meet and even start falling for a guy like Lucas. He changed everything; from her daily life that summer to her ability to heal and move on.

That's what scared her. She was starting to think that Lucas was _too_ important to her. No matter what, at the end of the summer she had to leave him. Family, friends, school, her _life_ was back in New York and Lucas couldn't change that.

"…but I guess that's just the way it is," Brooke heard Haley said. She snapped back to attention realizing she just missed the last 20 seconds what Haley had said because she had zoned out in her thoughts.

"I guess so," Brooke said in agreement and nodded, trying to make it seem like she had just heard whatever was told to her.

She rubs two of her fingers in small yet strong circles on her temples, trying to stop her head from spinning with the thoughts that plague her. She sits there for a moment with her eyes closed, the rhythmic pressure from her fingers relaxing her.

She finally opens her eyes again when she hears an announcer come over the loud speaker, calling out the names of the players of each team. When she hears Lucas' name being called out, she immediately finds the figure in the number 3 jersey running between the two lines of the other players and she can't help but to think how good he looks as he runs down the line.

Brooke soon realized that the event wasn't so much of a competitive game as it was an exhibition for the players to show their talent. In fact, the Scott brothers stood out among the rest like an iconic duo in the small southern town.

It was ally-op after dribbling trick after long three pointers after more dunks; the game looked more like street ball than a well coached team.

And after every shot he hit, Lucas would turn and send a boyish smile in Brooke's direction. A smile that never failed to make her heart flutter and somehow made her fall for him a little more every time.

* * *

"So what'd you think?" Lucas asked huskily as he came up to Brooke from behind her.

Brooke recognized the voice instantly and turned around with a grin, prepared to comeback with some smart comment, but she stopped to take in his appearance. "Jeeze Brookie, I know I'm hot but you don't have to stare."

Brooke raised an eyebrow and leaned to the side so that she could look beyond Lucas, only to find Nathan approaching them with a smirk on his face. Before she could spit out a comeback to the other Scott, Lucas pushed Nathan out of the way and towards Haley who was standing a few steps away.

"I thought it was very….sexy," Brooke said with a glint in her eye as she chose to ignore Nathan's comment.

"Why thank you," Lucas said with a slight blush as he wrapped his arms around Brooke's shoulders and began to lead her out of the now empty gym.

"Whoaaa, wait right there Scott," they both turned around to find Peyton and Jake coming out of the locker room doors hand in hand.

"What can I do for you Peyton?" Lucas asked, crossing his fingers in hopes that Whitey wouldn't make him stay and help clean up.

"For starters you can detach your hips so Brooke can come back to my place."

"But we were just about to go to the beach house," Lucas whined.

"And you can still go to the beach house; we're just going to meet you there."

Lucas groaned and Brooke chuckled at his overdramatic antics. She grabbed the tie that was hanging loosely around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss, one that she broke off and left Lucas begging for more.

"See ya later Lukey," Brooke said cheerily as she skipped over to Peyton, passing Jake who was walking towards Lucas.

"Wow," Peyton said. "I think you and Luke might actually be the second cheesiest couple in Tree Hill."

"Second?" Brooke asked. "You and Jake number one?"

"Nope," Peyton shook her head and pointed to where Nathan and Haley were standing and talking. "Those two and they're not even a couple!"

Brooke laughed but agreed. "I could definitely get them together though."

"Oh really?"

"Really," Brooke insisted.

"Jake, Lucas, and I have been trying for almost a year; no way you can do it."

"10 says I can," Brooke said with a mischievous grin and held out her hand for the bet. "And 20 says I can do it by the end of the night."

"You're on Davis."

* * *

Pulling up to the house in Peyton's car, all three girls saw that the party was already in full swing. Peyton sent Brooke a knowing look but Brooke just rolled her eyes. Of course it had taken them a long time to get ready, Brooke repeated; not only did she have to get herself ready but she had to get Haley looking extra hot.

When they stepped in the door the first thing that hit Brooke was familiar scent of boys and booze; basically it smelled like every other party she'd been to. And like every other part she'd been to, as soon as she entered she scanned the room for the person she was looking for. Usually it was Rachel, sometimes another friend or whoever she was sleeping with at that particular time, but tonight she was definitely looking for someone in particular.

And then she found him. He was leaning against the wall on the other side of the living room with a plastic cup of beer in his hand looking utterly bored as three girls were obviously hitting on him.

She was already almost halfway to him when he spotted her. He smiled and set his drink down on the small table behind him before leaving the girls without a word and walking to Brooke.

"Hi," Brooke whispered.

"Hi," Lucas whispered back, trying to control the grin on his face. Before Brooke could say anything else he leaned down and kissed her; gently at first, but it quickly escaladed.

"You look…" Lucas' eyes searched hers as he tried to come up with a word. "Amazing," he decided and kissed her once more.

"You don't look to bad yourself."

Lucas let a small smile play across his lips; he knew he looked good, but with Brooke he didn't feel like using his arrogant side anymore.

"Dance?" Lucas asked, never taking his eyes from hers.

Brooke only nodded and let Lucas lead her to the makeshift dance floor as another song started playing.

Their bodies molded together and their dancing became more provocative as the songs kept playing, but neither noticed the stares from around the room because to them it was like they were the only two there.

* * *

"Penny for your thoughts."

Brooke turned around to see Lucas walking up to her, holding out a red plastic cup of beer for her in one hand and one for himself in the other.

"Thanks," Brooke said quietly as she turned her herself back to look out over the beach from her spot on the quiet back porch. While the beach and the house were both swarming with drunken teenagers, the isolated deck that she and Lucas were standing on seemed to keep them away from the rest of the party.

Lucas watched curiously as Brooke looked down at the drink in her hands, raised it a few inches as if she was about to drink it, then set it down on the flat railing.

"Something wrong?" Lucas asked.

"Not really."

"_Not really_?" Lucas asked, confused and a little suspicious of the answer.

"It's been a while since I've done this."

"Done what?"

"This," Brooke said with more emphasis. "All of this," she motioned around the partying scene.

"Oh," Lucas said slightly surprised.

"After Matt…you know," Brooke started. "I kinda purged myself."

"Of what?"

"Booze, boys, and parties."

"Why?"

Brooke sighed. "Parties because I felt way too disconnected that being at a party made me feel like I was being suffocated, boys because the only ones that weren't jackasses were the ones I had totally platonic relationships with."

"And booze?"

"I never had a drinking problem," Brooke started. "I'd drink at parties, but never enough for it to get dangerous."

"So why give it up?"

"Because exactly three weeks after the funeral some of my friends insisted that it wasn't healthy not to get out anymore so they asked me to come to a party," Brooke said. "Big mistake."

Lucas raised his eyebrows and waited for Brooke to continue.

"I hit it kinda hard that night…actually really hard, and if it wasn't for Rachel I probably would have…I don't know, but whatever it is, I gave all those things up after that. It wasn't hard, but it was definitely different."

After a moment Brooke turned back to look at Lucas who seemed to be processing her words.

"Hey…guys," they turned to see Jake walking up hesitantly up the steps as he realized he interrupted a moment between the two.

"Hey," Brooke said with a smile, choosing to forget about the not-so-happy topic she and Lucas were just discussing.

"Hey man," Lucas said lightly, following Brooke's lead of changing the mood.

"Everything alright here?" Jake asked.

"Yeah," Brooke and Lucas said at the same time. They turned to each other realizing how forced it sounded.

"Everything's fine," Brooke insisted in a more reassuring tone. "Just…talking."

"Well it's a party Brooke, I know I'm not exactly beer chugging king or whatever, but I'm _pretty_ sure it's supposed to be _fun._"

"Ha-ha," Brooke deadpanned.

"Hey did Nate start the fire yet?" Lucas asked, noticing that the temperature had dropped a bit with the nighttime wind coming off the water.

"Yeah, we just set it up," Jake said and pointed to a vague area away from the house.

Brooke scanned the shore line. "Hey Jake?" Brooke said with a grin, her eyes glued to something down the beach.

"Yeah?"  
"Do you know where Peyton is?"

"Yeah, inside with some of the other cheerleaders, why?"

"I'm gonna go get her," Brooke said, finally taking her eyes off of what interested her so much, "you two stay here."

"Okay," Lucas and Jake said as Brooke quickly made her way inside and through the crowds looking for Peyton.

Barely a minute later Brooke had practically dragged out onto the porch where the guys were still waiting.

"What is so important?" Peyton asked, amused by Brooke's excitement.

"Well since I'm nice I won't actually make you pay me," Brooke said, "but to answer your question, _that_ is what is so important," Brooke said pointing down the beach.

"Oh my god," Peyton said slowly.

Lucas and Jake followed their stares and went wide-eyed as well.

"No way," they both said.

They all smiled as they watched Nathan and Haley kissing by the fire on the beach.

* * *

"Seriously Brooke," Peyton said, "how'd you do it?" An hour later she was still in awe of the fact that Brooke somehow got Nathan and Haley together.

Brooke grinned and looked down the beach to where the new couple could be seen making their way towards the fire where Brooke, Peyton, Lucas, and Jake were sitting.

"I guess I'm just that good," Brooke responded.

"Yeah, what'd you say to Nathan earlier?" Jake asked, recalling how he had seen Brooke talking to Nathan alone many times that night.

Brooke shrugged, not giving anything away to them.

"You'll tell me later, right?" Lucas whispered in her ear from where he sat behind her.

Brooke turned to look up at him and grinned. "We'll see," she teased.

Lucas gaped at her feigning hurt, but before he could say anything else, both his and Jake's phones started beeping.

"What's going on?" Brooke asked as he and Jake got up.

"Come on," Lucas said, helping Brooke up to her feet. All four began walking down the beach, stopping when they reached Nathan and Haley on the way to the house.

"Who's taking what tonight?" Nathan asked as he shut his alarm off and put his phone away.

"I'll take beach," Jake volunteered.

"I'll take the door," Lucas said.

"Then I'll take the music and the living room," Nathan said.

"What is going on?" Brooke cut in loudly before anyone could say anything else.

"You guys do your thing, I'll explain to her," Peyton said. The guys nodded and went their separate ways as Brooke, Peyton, and Haley stayed where they were.

"Okay," Peyton started. "So we have this tradition that on the Friday night parties we hold here, we kick everyone out at 1 o'clock."

"Which is what the guys are doing now," Haley said. "When everyone's gone we head inside to the den and watch movies 'till we fall asleep."

"Then tomorrow we clean up and hang out by the water all day."

"Oh," Brooke said. "Sounds nice."

"It's the best part about the party."

"Question."

"Yeah?

"Why were the guys making it seem like some sort of stealth mission?"

"Cause they're guys," Peyton said, laughing slightly at how seriously the three handled it. "Come on, let's go inside."

* * *

15 minutes later the guys tiredly shuffled into the den and plopped down on one of the couches next to their respective partner.

"Tough time tonight?" Peyton asked.

"Tim was trashed," Nathan said.

"Try finding someone who's willing to take him home like that," Jake said.

"Not an easy task," Lucas added.

"So what are we watching?" Haley asked.

Nathan got up and opened the largest drawer underneath the entertainment system that was full of DVDs.

"Luke it's your night to choose," Nathan said.

Lucas groaned and threw his head back onto the coach. He really didn't want to move. His muscles were already dead from the game that evening, and whatever alcohol he consumed at the party didn't exactly help.

"Wait a minute," Nathan said to himself and moved so that he could open the small bottom right drawer of the system. "Brooke come here."

"What?" Brooke lifted her head up from Lucas' shoulder; she was on the verge of falling asleep.

"Come here, I want to show you something," Nathan said and motioned her over.

Slowly, Brooke pushed herself up from the couch and practically fell down next to Nathan on the floor.

"Graceful," Nathan joked.

"Shut up," Brooke muttered and playfully pushed him. "What do you want to show me?"  
"Check this out," Nathan said and pointed inside the drawer. "I forgot we had these."

"Oh my god," Brooke gasped. "Now way."

"I know!"

"What is it?" Lucas asked tiredly from the couch.

"Season 3 of Friends," Brooke said and held up the case.

"And that's so fantastic because…?" Peyton asked.

"These are all _my_ DVDs," Brooke said. "I must have left them here over the years. In fact, I remember the summer I left this here," Brooke said of the Friends DVD.

"Yeah?"

Brooke nodded. "It was my favorite season so I totally freaked out when I got back to New York and realized that I didn't have it. After two months of whining about it, my dad just bought me a new one so I never even considered calling you guys or anything."

Nathan smirked. "You _would_ whine about this for two months."

"You're one to talk, you _kept _it!"

"Whatever," Nathan said.

"Should we watch it?" Haley asked.

"Definitely," Brooke grinned and handed it to Nathan before making her way back to the couch and sitting with Lucas.

* * *

The next thing Brooke was aware of was waking up. After forcing her eyes open to see her surroundings, she could vaguely remember watching a few episodes of Friends. She assumed they all fell asleep while watching because the TV screen was blaring blue from not being turned off.

"Go back to sleep," she tensed when she heard Lucas mumble from behind her, causing her to register that she was still on the couch with him. His face was nestled into her neck and his arm wrapped securely around her waist, holding her close to him.

Carefully removing Lucas' arm from around her, Brooke managed to get up from the couch without totally waking Lucas up. Seeing that both Peyton and Haley weren't with on the other couches with their respective boyfriends, she headed towards the kitchen.

"Hey," Haley said as she saw Brooke walk in.

"Hey," Brooke said as she sat down at the counter.

"Coffee?" Peyton asked.

"Thanks," Brooke said as she took the mug. "What time is it anyway?"

"Just after one."

"In the afternoon?" Brooke asked.

"No, in the morning, that bright shining sun is just your imagination," Peyton responded, playful sarcasm dripping from her words.

"Oh relax," Haley cut in.

"So how long have you two been up?" Brooke asked.

"I don't know, like a half an hour," Haley said. "So listen, we were thinking of heading out to the beach now so that when the guys get up, they can clean up since we'll already be outside."

"Sounds perfect," Brooke grinned.

"Good so let's get changed and out there before we wake them," Peyton said and they all went upstairs to get changed.

Brooke checked herself in the mirror one last time, making sure that the straps on her dark green bikini were securely fastened. Just as she was about to leave, something in the reflection caught her eye. In her bag on the bed behind her, Brooke could see that the small light on her phone was on, indicating that she had a message.

"Brooke!" Brooke could hear Peyton calling her name to check if she was ready. Shrugging off the message as Rachel probably calling to check in on her, Brooke grabbed her sunglasses and left the room to meet Peyton and Haley in the hallway.

* * *

Forty minutes after the girls settled themselves on the beach, the guys wandered out looking more than slightly annoyed that they had gotten stuck with cleaning up again.

Between the tanning, water fights, and watching the guys play football on the beach, it would have been the perfect day had Brooke's thoughts from the previous day found their way back into her head.

Laying out on the quiet beach, she let her mind wander. She couldn't help but ask herself what she had really intended to do when she left her life and came down to Tree Hill, North Carolina. She couldn't help but to ask herself what her life would be like when she went back home.

Turning to Lucas who was sitting next to her, she wondered if Lucas' would still be there for her when she left in August.

"Everything alright?" Lucas asked, taking his eyes off the road and looking at Brooke as he felt her gaze on him.

"Yeah," Brooke said unconvincingly.

"You sure?" Lucas asked as he pulled up to her house. It was only about 8 o'clock, but after the full night and day, everyone was tired so they headed their separate ways.

"I think…" Brooke started, "I think I'm getting too attached to you."

"Too attached." Lucas asked and Brooke nodded. "What do you mean?"

"I mean I care about you way too much to only have known you for what? Ten or eleven days?"  
"So?" Lucas asked with a smile, trying to hide his confusion and the expectation of hurt. "It's a whirlwind romance," he tried to reason with her.

"Yeah, it is," Brooke said with a sad smile. "Meaning it's going to end."  
"Oh," Lucas knew what she was getting at.

"You've already been there for me through so much, and I'm just worried what will happen when you're not there anymore."

"Brooke—"

"It's not that—I just—" Brooke could get the words out. "I don't want to lose you Lucas, but I can't be so….dependant on you right now."

Lucas nodded with a clenched jaw. He was angry, hurt, and frustrated that he couldn't find the words to convince her that she was wrong. Maybe, he thought, it was because on some level she was right.

Brooke leaned over and placed a soft kiss on Lucas cheek.

"I'll talk to you soon," she said quietly before grabbing her bag and getting out of the car.

Walking quickly up the driveway, Brooke had her keys in her hand, ready to unlock the door, slip inside, lie down and try to convince herself that what she just did was the right thing for her.

As soon as she opened the door she could hear the engine rev behind her. She turned just in time to see Lucas speeding down the street.

Letting out a long sigh, Brooke turned back to the door and pushed it open farther. As soon as she stepped inside she knew something was off.

She saw the briefcase and sports jacket sitting against the table in the foyer as soon as she walked in. She knew what that meant, but she couldn't believe it; not yet.

Walking as quietly as possible through the first part of the house, Brooke stopped short when she saw him. He was standing with his back to her in front of the glass sliding doors on the other side of the room, seeming to admire the backyard with the last fleeting pieces of light reflecting over the pool.

He turned around, sensing her presence. Part of her expected to see some sort of a sardonic smirk across his face, but instead there were so many emotions running through him that his face was totally unreadable.

His eyes seemed cut straight into her and at that moment, she felt something inside of her break.

She started backing up, her vulnerability was taking over and she wished more than anything that she hadn't sent Lucas away. She wished that he was there with her now, because through everything she had told him and exposed to him, she needed him now the most.

Her back hit the wall and she knew it was all real. She used every ounce of strength within her to hold back the sobs and the tears that her body wanted so desperately to let out.

Her next sound came out in a choked and cracked voice. It was only one word.

"Dad…"

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review. I'm begging you to review.  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- if I ever take even close to that long again, please PM me to speed me up**


	8. Oh Daddy

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks so much for the incredible reviews last chapter! There weren't as many as the last chapter but they were still amazing.  
**

**I worked really hard on this chapter so I hope that you all like it.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

"Dad…"

She didn't know what to say past that. In the silence she was still trying to get a read on him but she couldn't and that meant she couldn't prepare herself for whatever was going to come her way.

She looked to the side and away from his gaze in attempt to lessen the crushing emotional blow she felt just by seeing him. She moved swiftly into the kitchen knowing that her father would follow her. She dropped her bag on the kitchen table and immediately started rummaging through it for her cell phone.

Wait.

She froze.

Her mind flashed to earlier that day. She saw the message on her phone and she walked out of the room.

"Shit," Brooke muttered to herself and threw the contents of her bag down, realizing that she could have known about this as soon as she woke up.

She turned back to her father and crossed her arms over her chest; immediately on the defensive. "What are you doing here?"  
"What am _I_ doing here?" He asked incredulously. "What are _you_ doing here?" He yelled and she knew what that first emotion was.

* * *

_I know a girl  
She puts the color inside of my world  
but she's just like a maze  
Where all of the walls all continually change_

Lucas sat in his car in the driveway of his house. He had made it there in record time based on the speed he was driving from Brooke's house. He understood why she did it, but he was still hurt.

Sighing, he tilted his head back and closed his eyes. He really didn't want to go inside. Dan wasn't there and that made the house semi-bearable, but Nathan's car was in the driveway. He really didn't want to walk in on him and Haley celebrating their new relationship.

Only the presence of a buzzing sound next to him caused him to open his eyes and lift up his head.

Looking down at the seat next to him, he found a familiar looking cell phone.

"Shit."

_And I've done all I can  
To stand on her steps with my heart in my hand  
Now I'm starting to see  
Maybe it's got nothing to do with me_

* * *

Anger.

Yeah, that was definitely the first one.

"It's my house," Brooke replied and right away regretted it. She knew any form of 'attitude' wasn't the way to go, but the words just slipped out before she could stop them.

She could have told him why she was _really_ here. She could have told him that in the past two months he had completely failed as a father to her and that's why she resorted to deceitful and manipulative tactics in order to get away from and the mournful life they were leading back in New York.

But, she loved him because he was her dad, and she wasn't quite ready to tell him something like that. She wasn't sure if she'd ever be to tell him her true reasons for hiding out at her old summer home.

"It's you house," he scoffed, repeating her words. "Your right, it is."

"What are you doing here?" Brooke repeated; her volume lower, but her voice firmer.

Robert Davis leaned back on the counter behind him, looking all too calm for Brooke's liking in a situation like this.

"I went up to campus this weekend for a few friendly meetings and thought 'why don't I surprise Brooke'. You know, a nice meal and a chance to catch up a little, whatever," he started. "Imagine my surprise when the director of the program tells me that you aren't attending this summer."

Brooke looked away and towards the ground.

"I told him he must be mistaken, that I was positive that my daughter was there," he continued; his words still slow and steady. "There were only two other places that you'd go if you didn't want to be around anyone. You weren't at either of Rachel's houses so I figured you were here. Turns out I was right."

Brooke's eyes flickered up to meet his for a moment and then darted back down to the floor.

"I'm not sure if I should be happy that I know you so well or disappointed that you actually ran away," he said, his voice softening for just a moment. He stared at her waiting for a response but he got nothing. "What happened, Brooke?"

Brooke blinked in shock. 'what happened?' she thought. Well what she wanted now was to scream and yell and tell him that what happened was that her entire life fell apart and he didn't exactly help that.

But, once again, she wasn't going to say that.

"I just needed some space," She said in tired voice. "I couldn't handle everything and…"

"Why didn't you come to us?"

"What?"

"Why didn't you come to me," he reiterated, "or even your mother. Why didn't you come to one of us instead of just disappearing?" His voice was rising again.

Could he really be that oblivious, or is he just ignorant? Brooke asked herself. Her frustration was reaching it's breaking point and she didn't know if she could hold back her words longer.

"Are you actually asking me that?" Brooked asked. "Think about it."

"Think about what?" He bit back. "We're your parents, you're supposed to come to us!"

Brooke scoffed. "That's such bullshit and you know it," she told him. Despite the slight regret she felt for cursing at her dad – she knew that that action would never help her – the anger was so great that she didn't act on the regret.

"When?" Brooke asked. "When mom was yelling at me or when she was drinking herself to sleep? When you weren't to be disturbed at work or when you were locked up in your home office?"

His demeanor changed immediately. The physical evidence wasn't much, but Brooke could see it clearly. She could see how his shoulders slumped just the slightest bit, and she could see how his eyes softened and he moved to take a small step back.

Then there was silence between the two. Brooke watched her father carefully, seeing the emotion run through his eyes as he recounted the last two months. She saw the regret when he realized his failures, and then in a split second she saw the grief wash over him.

Even with the anger coursing through her veins she could still feel the pit growing in her stomach; the ache she felt for making her father have to think about what happened again, to make him suffer even more.

But he didn't say anything and neither did Brooke.

So the two stood in silence.

They weren't looking at each other anymore, much to both of their relief. Now they were keeping their eyes trained on anything else; a picture on the wall behind the other person or a spot on the floor.

Brooke closed her eyes for a moment and she could feel her body get heavy with exhaustion. Surviving the party and a day at the beach was easy; it was the arguing that took all her energy away from her. Now all she wanted to do was get her father out of the house, crawl into bed, and call Lucas.

But no, she couldn't do that, she silently scolded herself. _Great fucking move, Brooke_ she thought to herself.

_Fathers, be good to your daughters  
Daughters will love like you do  
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers  
So mothers, be good to your daughters too_

* * *

Lucas was driving much slower now. He wasn't speeding down the road like he had when he left Brooke's house. Now he was creeping down the roads in dread. His pride was going to take a major hit on this one.

He wasn't going back to beg her to reconsider, but just the act of showing up on her doorstep would be enough to shrink his ego a bit.

Granted he was only returning her cell phone, but Lucas really didn't want to have to see her at the moment because if he saw her then it might hurt and if it hurt, well then Lucas knew he was in big trouble.

His phone ringing snapped him out of his thoughts. He brought it to his ear and answered without taking his eyes off the road.

"Hello?"

"Hey man, it's me," Nathan's voice came through the ear piece.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Where'd you go?" Nathan asked. "I saw you parked outside the house and then the next thing I know, you're gone."

"Yeah," Lucas said, trying to keep any emotion out of his voice. "I'm just stopping by Brooke's for a second."

Despite the smirk that crossed his face, Nathan was worried for a second when he noticed that Lucas' voice sounded more like the 'old' Lucas' voice. The one that never seemed to care about what he was doing; the one before Brooke came along. It was a weird thought that Brooke was able to change Lucas so much, Nathan realized, considering they hadn't even known each for two weeks. But when Nathan thought about it, it took Haley less than that time to change him.

"Alright," Nathan finally concluded with no traces of hesitance in his voice and a playful manor back. "I'd say don't fall for her man, but I think it's a little late for that."

"Yeah," Lucas said quietly, a little more to himself than to Nathan. Lost in his own thoughts, Lucas hadn't even noticed the long pause before Nathan's answer. "You still with Haley?" He asked as he turned down Brooke's street.

"Yeah, we're gonna hang here," Nathan said.

"'kay, I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah," Nathan said before they both hung up.

Lucas took a deep breath when he came to a stop in front of Brooke's house.

* * *

_Ooh, you see that skin?  
It's the same she's been standing in  
Since the day she saw him walking away  
Now she's left  
cleaning up the mess he made_

There were times when Brooke loved the silence; the times when she could sit and relax and gather her thoughts; the times when nothing or no one else was bothering her.

There were also times when the silence freaked her out; when it was late and dark and she was alone in her large apartment. Her parents would be out at some sort of function and Brooke would come home to find complete emptiness. Nevermind the fact that Rachel lived across the street and was only a phone call away, nevermind that she could turn on every light in the house if she wanted to, never mind that there were always two doormen downstairs in the lobby, Brooke was always freaked out by _that _silence. She usually just blamed it on watching too many episodes of Law & Order as a kid.

But _this _silence; this silence made Brooke understand the meaning of 'silence is deafening'.

They weren't moving or saying anything and there wasn't a sound in the house. It was too quiet, Brooke thought; so quiet that her ears were ringing.

But then something else was ringing; her father's cell phone.

He took it out of its attachment on his belt and sighed when he saw the caller.

The phone rang again and he rubbed his eyes for a second and Brooke watched him carefully.

After the third ring he lifted the phone his ear. His eyes were still closed and Brooke could see him composing himself. She watched his thumb press down and she heard the small beep of the answer button.

His eyes snapped open. "Robert Davis," He answered; mechanical, powerful, businesslike.

He turned away from her. "Hi Rick," he continued in a more friendly but still professional voice.

Brooke shouldn't have been surprised when without indication to her, Robert Davis walked out of the room.

Once he was gone Brooke slumped back and leaned against one of the kitchen table chairs behind her. The house was now filled with his words of business and golf games as his voice floated around the house from the room he had moved to.

Brooke turned herself so that she could see the stairs. Just looking at them she could imagine running up them and into her bathroom. Her hands were shaking, he heart was still pounding and her head was spinning with thoughts of what had just happened and what would happen when her father came back into the room.

A Xanax was what Brooke needed at the moment. _Maybe three or four_ Brooke thought to herself.

She was already four steps high on the stair case when the doorbell rang and she froze. She clenched her shaking fists and sent a longing glance up the rest of the stairs before reluctantly turning and heading to the front door.

Not considering who could be at the door, Brooke flung it open in exasperation. Seeing Lucas standing there uncomfortably she took an unconscious step backwards.

"Hi," Lucas said with a bit of nervousness and coldness.

"Hey," Brooke's voice cracked.

Pushing his own emotions and concerns to the side for a moment, Lucas could see how tense Brooke was, and based on the way she opened the door, it wasn't because Lucas was standing there.

_Are you okay?_ Lucas wanted desperately to ask.

But he didn't.

"You left this in my car," Lucas got straight to the point and held her phone out in such away that he made sure that their hands wouldn't touch.

"Thanks," Brooke said quietly and took the cell phone. Opening it, she was met with an array of alerts. Eight missed calls, two voicemails, and four text messages. Most were Rachel's warnings.

"Fuck," Brooke muttered, realizing that her entire confrontation with her father could have gone much differently had she just answered her phone earlier that day when she saw she had a message.

Lucas furrowed his brow in confused as he looked at her.

"Brooke!" Both of their heads snapped up at the voice calling Brooke. Too caught up in seeing Lucas, Brooke hadn't even realized that her father wasn't on the phone anymore.

They heard the footsteps coming towards them and before Brooke could fully react, the door was pulled fully open to reveal Robert Davis who did not look too happy.

"What's going on here?" He asked, the confusion only evident in his words, not the cold tone of his voice.

"Dad," Brooke stopped him from saying anything else. As soon as the word left her mouth she could see Lucas' eyes widen.

Robert looked at her and the realization dawned on him. Brooke didn't want him to be rude because she clearly cared about the boy standing across the doorway. With that, his anger was renewed.

Brooke saw it click with her dad and she immediately turned to Lucas.

"I'll uh…" she trialed off. She wanted to say that she'd talk to him soon, but with the appearance of her father and what she had told Lucas earlier, she wasn't so sure if she'd be talking to him soon. "I'm sorry," she told him and then closed the door.

"Who the hell was that?" Robert yelled as Brooke walked passed him and back into the kitchen. Brooke cringed slightly. Saying 'hell' was a lot for him. She never heard her father curse.

"That was Lucas," Brooke answered curtly, purposely leaving out the Scott. If she recalled correctly, her father always disliked the smug son of a bitch named Dan Scott. Dan was one of the richest and most influential people in town and around other people he seemed to be a sickeningly charming guy. So besides the way he pushed Nathan in basketball, Brooke had never really seen a reason for her father to not like Dan. So she asked him one day when she was about thirteen or so. Her father told her that even though he was a bit older he had known Dan for a long time because he had spent many of his summers in Tree hill. He told her that Dan had done something that he didn't agree with. 'Adult stuff' he brushed it off as.

Now that Brooke thought about it, he was probably referring to how Dan abandoned Karen and Lucas.

She walks through the kitchen and to the sliding glass doors and stands in front of them with her back to her father. Although she can see his reflection in the clean glass, she stares through it.

When she thinks about everything that's happened between them in the past 11 days including the decision she made in the car less than an hour ago, she realizes something.

She knows why she wants to distance herself from Lucas; she knows that even if it is great for that summer, it will hurt that much more when it ends. And it will end, she tells herself. And the realization that hits her in the moment of clarity is where that belief comes from.

It comes everyone around her. Despite the abundance of movies she's seen that have made her a closet romantic, she doesn't have any real reason to believe in love; she has no concrete evidence of it.

At school the relationships that aren't based solely on sex or popularity aren't the type that will last. She knows some people that tell they're boyfriends or girlfriends 'I love you', but she has yet to see a relationship with someone her age where they're both actually _in love_; the kind of love that won't fall apart with a high school rumor and the kind that will last when they part for college. Her brother on the other hand was a serial monogamist. He had _too_ many serious relationships throughout high school and college for Brooke to believe that any he was in love with any of them instead of just loved them.

Half of her friends' parents are either divorced or cheating on each other with one of the lifeguards or tennis instructors in the Hamptons, and the other half she doesn't know well enough to judge something like this on.

More than either of those two reasons, she knows that her lake of faith that true love exists lies in her parents' relationship.

Her mother and father have been married for almost 30 years; longer than any of her friends' parents. That should make her believe that it can last, right?

Not really, Brooke thinks. They've been together for so long and they're not necessarily unhappy, they're just not happy. She rarely sees any display of affection between the two, and when she really thinks about it, she can't remember the last time she heard them exchange 'I love you's.

Before she can analyze her relationship with Lucas against her parent's marriage any further, she hears her father muttering 'Lucas' behind her.

She can't tell if he's figuring out that it is in fact Lucas Scott, or if he's just trying to figure out what's going on.

"Is that what this is about?" He asks and Brooke turns around to face him. He looks slightly disappointed and a little angry as well as confused. "This is all about a boy?"

"No Dad," Brooke says shaking her head, much calmer than she thought she would be. "It's not about him."  
"Then what is this about?" He pleads with her to explain it all.

"It about…." Brooke searched for the words. There was no shortage of reasons for her to be there, but she wasn't sure of how to describe it. "It's about the fact that I needed to get away from everything so that I could actually breath for the first time in god only knows how long. It's about the fact that I'm finally starting to sleep through the night because it's been far too long since I could last say that I was fully rested. It's about…" she trailed off again and could see her father's eyes softening. "It's about me finally learning how to move on and get my life back together."

Even though the tears were just about to spill over, Brooke used every ounce of strength she had to push them back.

"I can't do this anymore," She mumbled and took a few quick steps to the kitchen table. She grabbed her cell phone and keys and darted out of the house.

When her dad finally registered that she was leaving, he ran after her. By the time he stepped out onto the front porch she's already in her car.

"Brooke!" he shouted but to no avail. She's already driving down the road and he has no way to go after her because he took a cab from the airport.

But he knows that she'll be back, so he turns around and goes back inside to wait.

_So fathers, be good to your daughters  
Daughters will love like you do  
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers  
So mothers, be good to your daughters too_

* * *

She doesn't know all the roads yet, but she knows her way around pretty well. So when she leaves her house in a rush, Brooke just lets the roads take her where ever they want.

She doesn't realize until she's there, but she's driven straight to the park.

She navigates her way through, hoping to find Lucas playing basketball at the Rivercourt, but when pulls up to the edge of the concrete court, he's nowhere to be found.

She won't go to his house though, because should wouldn't know what to say if she just showed up on his door. Finding him at the court seemed a lot easier than seeking him out in a more obvious way.

Even though Lucas isn't there, she gets out of the car and walks over to the picnic bench. As soon as she sits down and takes in her peaceful surroundings, she knows why he loves this place so much.

Alone in the park, her thoughts are racing through her mind so quickly that she can't even fully comprehend them.

She needs someone to talk to.

Within two seconds she had taken her cell phone out and hit the speed dial number for Rachel.

One ring. Two rings.

"Hello?" Rachel's voice shouted through the line; it was clear that she hadn't checked the caller ID.

"Rach is Brooke."

"Brooke?!" she yelled.

"Yeah."

By the background noise that Brooke could hear, it was obvious that Rachel was at a party. It was Saturday night after all, so Brooke didn't expect much less. When the noise cut off she assumed that Rachel locked herself in a room away from the crowds.

"Finally," she heard Rachel mutter. "Brooke, thank god you called me. I've been trying to get in touch with out all day," she started freaking out over the phone. "I mean you were answering anything and I have some pretty huge news about y—"

"About my dad," Brooke finished for her.

"He's there isn't he."

"Yep."

She heard Rachel sigh on the other end.

"I'm so sorry B," she apologized.

"It's okay," Brooke shrugged. "Unless of course you told him that I was here…" she trialed off with suspicion and uncertainty.

"No!" Rachel defended. "God no, I would never do that to you."

"I know, I'm sorry."

"Yeah," Rachel calmed down. "But he did call me."

"He did?"

"Yeah."

"What'd you say?"

"He called late last night and left a message saying that he was going to see you today and he said that if I wanted to go with him then I should be downstairs and ready to go early."

"Oh," Brooke said, her voice mostly getting lost in her throat, suddenly feeling a bit guilty for being so angry with her father. She had resented him for not caring for so long, but here he was willing to drive four hours with Rachel just so that she could see her best friend for a day.

"I didn't get the message until after he left…"

"Oh," Brooke said again.

"He called me when he realized you went AWOL though," Rachel continued. "He asked if I knew where you were but I said I didn't. He figured this one out all on his own."

"Yeah, I guess he did," Brooke smiled slightly, somehow able to feel happy that he father still knew her so well despite all of the evidence to the contrary. "Listen Rach, I have to go."

"What?" Rachel said surprised. "Wait! What's going to happen? Is he making you come back or what?"

"I don't know yet," Brooke admitted. "I kinda ran out on him a few minutes ago."

"Oh.

"Yeah," Brooke chuckled. "It's one of those days"

"You'll get through it though."

"Yeah, I hope so," Brooke said. "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Definitely," Rachel agreed. "I should get back to the party. You know, things to see, people to do."

Brooke let out a real laugh. "Something likes that."

"Later bitch."

"Bye slut," Brooke said unusually affectionately for the term and hung up the phone.

She took a slow deep breath and looked around the Rivercourt one last time before heading back to her car. She really knew why Lucas loved this place.

* * *

_Boys, you can break  
You find out how much they can take  
Boys will be strong  
And boys soldier on  
But boys would be gone without warmth from  
A woman's good, good heart_

Nathan walked back into the beach house surprised to find some of the lights on. Haley had to get home to help her mother set up for some of her sisters that would be coming to Tree Hill the next morning so he was left by himself.

He had let his mind wander back to old times at the beach house during the summertime; the summers long before Lucas was a part of his life, even before he hated Dan. They were the summers that he had spent with the Peyton and the Davis'.

So he headed to the beach house in search of some old home movies that he was certain were buried somewhere in the house.

When they had all left earlier that day they had cleaned up and shut down everything. So he found it a little creepy that the lights were on when he got there.

"Hello?" he called out into the house and walked around carefully incase someone was there.

"Anyone here?" he tried again. When he turned into the living room he immediately saw a figure sitting out on the back porch through the glass doors on the other side of the room.

He moved closer with caution, but when he was only a few feet away he relaxed realizing it was Lucas.

"Dude, what are you doing here?" Nathan asked after opening the door and stepping out into the cool salty wind.

Lucas looked up surprised.

"Hey," Lucas said and motioned for his brother to sit down.

Nathan complied and turned to face Lucas. "Man you look depressing," he joked. Lucas was sitting all alone outside at night staring at the ocean with a beer in his hand.

"Did you know Brooke's father is here?" Lucas asked, ignoring Nathan's comment.

"What?"

"Yep," Lucas nodded.

"I thought her parents didn't know where she was."

"So did I," Lucas said. "And from the looks of it, so did she."

"Damn," Nathan whispered under his breath realizing that the shit had probably hit the fan for Brooke. "What's gonna happen?"

"I have no idea," Lucas shrugged. "I mean that was a pretty private and heated conversation that I wasn't supposed to be around for."

"Right," Nathan said figured that Lucas had probably spent the last half hour or so going over what the possible scenarios could be.

"Was her mom there?" Nathan asked after a minute of silence.

"Huh?"

"Her mother? Was she there?"

"I don't think so," Lucas said with confusion that only grows when he sees Nathan let out a sigh of relief and mutter 'good'.

Nathan was there the summer after 8th grade when things got so bad between Brooke and her mother that there were threats of boarding school. Not idle ones either; brochures and applications had arrives all throughout the summer; each one Brooke sent straight to the trash. He was there through the pointless fights that would stretch for hours or even days. He was there when Brooke would run to his house just to get away from her mother. And Mrs. Davis was only there for a few weeks out of the summer.

* * *

_On behalf of every man  
looking out for every girl  
You are the god and the weight of her world_

When Brooke arrives home the house is silent except for the very faint sounds of her father working in the study.

He had left the porch light on for her as well as the one in the hallway but she's not the least bit surprised even though he's probably still livid with her. Back home, whether she was at Rachel's to hang out for a few hours or someone's party and she'd get back at an ungodly hour he'd always leave the front door unlocked and the foyer light on dimly so that she wouldn't trip when she walked in.

She wanted to go into the study to see him but the slightest bit of nagging anger in the back of her mind stopped her and she went straight upstairs.

Her father always did say she was the most stubborn person he knew.

* * *

It had been 45 minutes since he heard the front door open and close and the lights click off. 40 minutes since he heard the water in the upstairs bathroom be turned off signaling Brooke was ready to get into bed. And if he knew his daughter as well as he thought he did, Robert assumed that it had been roughly 30 seconds since she last checked what time it was in frustration.

There was no way that she would be able to go to sleep that night. He knew it, and he knew that she knew it.

His daughter had always had sleeping issues; ones that were only heightened by the stress of school and of Matt's disease. Sometimes it would take her hours to get to sleep on a school night. Her stress would prevent her from sleeping and then her tiredness would make her more stressed which would further prevent her from sleeping. It was a vicious cycle that had run her into the ground a few times that year.

As if on cue like so many times she had done that year, Brooke appeared looking tired and frustrated in the doorway of the den where he was watching ESPN's golf highlights.

He looked up at her but didn't say anything. If he had to guess, the same memories that were playing through his head were playing through hers. The ones when she was so young that when she would wake up from nightmares he would take her in his arms and walk around his bedroom with her, singing off key lullabies in her ear until she fell asleep in his arms. The ones where they would spend Saturday mornings in the park together on the sidelines of one of Matt's soccer or baseball games. The ones where they would joke around while cooking Sunday night dinner together or the ones where they would sit and talk in the kitchen late at night for a snack to keep them going through whatever work they had left that night.

There were too many good memories to count. He couldn't have wished for a better relationship with his little girl; a relationship he had taken for granted in the last few months.

Without any words, he lifted his arm out to her and she darted to his side at the couch.

He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close as she crawled up as close to him as possible.

He kissed the top of her head and whispered "I love you baby girl," to her as he felt the first tear soak through his shirt.

_So fathers, be good to your daughters  
Daughters will love like you do  
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers  
So mothers be good to your daughters, too._

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Whether or not her mother knows where she is or if her dad wants her to go back to New York or not will be explained in the next chapter. There will also be more Brucas in the next chapter. Anything else you guys want to see? Please let me know. I'm open to suggestions.**

**Please review.  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	9. A Round of Golf

**Hey everyone!**

**I'm starting to feel like a broken record with the amount of times I've been apologizing for not updating faster, but I have to say it again. I'm SO SORRY for taking so long. Finals are this week so I'm not sure how much writing I'll be able to get in after this chapter, but after this week I'll have plenty of time to update. I don't know how long this story is going to be, but I know that there's still a ways to go, so there will be plenty to read this summer.**

**Last chapter I forgot to credit the song. It was "Daughters" by John Mayer. The one in this chapter is "Sideways" by Citizen Cope.**

**Thanks for the amazing reviews last chapter, especially **toddntan, silverfoxx01, **and** yaba,** who left particularly great reviews.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

_You know it ain't easy  
For these thoughts here to leave me  
There's no words to describe it  
In French or in English_

While the previous night's lack of yelling felt like a truce between the father and daughter, the next morning, it felt more like an impasse.

They had sat in silence for far too long just watching the blaring screen in front of them. Robert kept his arm around her protectively as they sat together, and when his paternal instinct kicked in and he ushered her to bed. All Brooke said was a simple and fairly distant 'good night' before heading upstairs.

There was a painful feeling of being back home that night. The helpless and even sometimes hopeless feeling as she lay in bed for sleepless hours. Too much was running through her mind for her to get a decent rest once she actually fell asleep. She had woken up at 1:30 and then again at 3, and when she had woken up for the third time at 7:15 she finally gave up on sleep.

So when she gets out of bed she quietly put on some comfortable clothes and crept down the hall so not to wake her still sleeping father. She figured that being away from their impressively large yet suffocating apartment in Manhattan has allowed him to get a good night sleep. For her, the presence of her father had prevented her from getting the sleep that she has been catching up on for the last week and a half.

Even though she's so hungry that her stomach hurts, she walks past the kitchen and exits the house.

It's a short drive to her destination so Brooke doesn't even bother to turn on the music she rarely drives without. When she arrives at the Rivercourt after a few minutes she's surprised to see Lucas sitting there on top of the picnic table, rhythmically spinning the ball in his hands. It's weird, she thinks, that she didn't expect him to be there considering she went there looking for him. She had been there the night before at a decent time and he wasn't there, and now it's an ungodly early hour on a Sunday morning and of course he's there.

But now she doesn't know what to say. All she knew is that she wanted to see him and talk to him, but since she didn't really expect to find him, she's now at a loss for words.

And then she realizes how weird it looks for her to be sitting in her car to the side of the court watching him. He's staring back at her, never stopping the movements of his hands and the ball.

One long deep breath and Brooke finally emerged from the car. The cold morning air hit her quickly and she quickly wrapped her jacket around her tighter. It was an old warm up jacket of Matt's that he had given her a few years ago, and Matt's death or not, it was her favorite jacket.

"Hey," Brooke said shyly when she finally approached Lucas.

"Hey." He was clearly confused. The day before she had basically told him that she needed space from him and now she had come looking for him. But then it clicks that she's standing in front of him at just after 7:30 in the morning when her father had suddenly showed up the night before. So now his confusion is heightened but his pride filled coldness was replaced with worry.

"What are you—"

"Doing here?" Brooke finished for him. "I have a lot to explain to you."

"You don't have to explain anything to me, Brooke."

"Maybe I don't have to, but I want to," she said with less strength and more insecurity in her voice. "If you'll listen."

A cool wind swept in from the river and across the park, and Lucas stared at Brooke, watching her try to stay ignore the shiver that spread through her body.

"Yeah," Lucas finally said and saw her pleading eyes show relief, "but let's go someplace warmer."

* * *

_Well, diamonds they fade  
And flowers they bloom  
And I'm telling you_

"Here," Brooke looked up just in time to see Lucas placing a cup of coffee on the table in front of her.

When they had left the Rivercourt, Lucas had directed her to his mother's café where they now were. It was quiet and empty since it was barely eight on a Sunday morning and therefore wouldn't open for a few more hours.

"Thanks," Brooke said quietly as Lucas took a seat opposite her.

"So what did you want to tell me?" Lucas got straight to the point. Maybe it was a little cold, but he wasn't going to let himself be hung up on some girl that didn't want him. Of course it was only in his head he that he could control something like that.

"A lot, and I'm not really sure where or how to start."

"Why don't you start with why your dad is here," Lucas suggested.

Brooke took a sip of her coffee and swallowed hard.

"He found out that I had basically disappeared and somehow guessed that I'd be here, so he came to…I don't really know why he came."

"Is he going to make you go back?" Lucas asked, trying to hide the emotion in his voice.

"I don't know," Brooke admitted. "I mean, I don't think so. If that's what he wanted he probably would have mentioned that yesterday, but then again there were other things that we were…discussing then."

"Things?"

"Just things," Brooke said. "I'm not really sure I'm ready to talk about that stuff yet."

Lucas nodded understandingly even though he was curious about what they were talking about.

"Is he the only one that knows you're here?"

"Besides Rachel, I'm assuming so. If my mom knew there is no way I'd still be here right now, and no matter how angry or disappointed in me my father is right now, I don't think he would tell her."

"Why not?"

"Because he knows how ugly that could get. I mean my mom is not exactly the most understanding person at the moment and with our already unstable relationship I think he knows not to fuel the fire so to speak."

Lucas nodded and took a long sip of his coffee.

"Is your relationship with your mother really that bad?" He asked. It was hard for him to imagine her relationship with her parents considering he had a horrible one with his father and a fantastic one with his mother, almost the opposite of her family life.

Brooke sighed and let her shoulders slump slightly. Lucas figured it was probably because she's gone through that answer more than enough times.

"At the end of the day, no matter what she's still my mother and I love her, but that doesn't mean I like her very much."

"What do you mean you don't like her?"

"Everyone knows that the most prominent personality trait I get from my mom is my stubbornness," Brooke explained. "It's weird because that's the only thing we have in common that is really the same. Everything else that's similar between us is so different at the same time. Does that make sense?"

"Sorta…"

"Alright," Brooke searched for the right words. "We're both really controlling about our surroundings. But while she's controlling in the way needs to have _everything_ clean and done the way she likes, I'm controlling in the way that I never let anyone into my room or move my stuff around. So when she's trying to clean my room, I flip out."

"Oh," Lucas said in slight understanding. Despite the seriousness of what Brooke was talking about he couldn't help but smile at the passionate hand gestures she was making as she tried to explain herself. Not only that, but he can now begin to understand the little things he's noticed about her in the past week; like how whenever he's at her house, he was probably in any part of the house alone except for her room. When he's in there, almost always Brooke is too.

"Look," Brooke began. "I can tell you how much we fight daily and I can still tell you that she's my mom and I love her. We have a relationship that is so full of contradictions that it'll make your head spin. All you need to know is that when you put my mom and I together, we're gonna clash and it's not gonna be pretty."

* * *

_These feelings won't go away  
They've been knockin' me sideways  
They've been knockin' me out lately  
Whenever you come around me_

Lucas continued to watch and listen as Brooke tried to explain everything she could. He watched her struggle to find the words she wanted to describe something so complicated that Lucas was pretty sure that she wouldn't be able to describe the way she wanted.

But now he could see that the attempts to give him the answers he wanted had tired her out when she was clearly not well rested.

"Brooke?" Lucas asked and she looked up from her now cool coffee.

"Yeah?"

"Are you sure you're okay?"

Brooke shrugged as if the question she had heard so many times before didn't kill her. "I'll be okay."

Maybe if she had more strength in her voice Lucas would have believed her, but at the moment, he didn't know if he could.

But there was something else that made him think that maybe she wouldn't be okay. There was one thing that she had said to him that he couldn't get out of his head.

_"Despite the ups and downs, I had a pretty amazing family, and now….now I just don't. Nothing's the same. Nothing will ever be the same."_

"So there was one other thing that I wanted to talk to you about," Lucas blinked himself out of his thoughts and turned back to Brooke. "And it's really not easy for me so try to bear with me."

Lucas nodded hesitantly, not sure of what she wanted to tell him, and waited for her to continue.

"What I said to you yesterday," Brooke started and stopped when she saw the change in Lucas' demeanor. She took a deep breath and continued. "You see I've never really done the feelings thing before. I've never really cared this much, and that scares me. That scares me and going home at the end of the summer scares me too. I hate that I've already started to get attached because it's going to make it that much harder at the end….so I guess I made a sort of preemptive strike."

Lucas just stares back at her and she can't figure out if he's angry, waiting, or not paying attention.

"I knew why I wanted to distance myself from you, but I didn't think about what caused the why. I guess with everything that's gone on in the last twelve hours, I've discovered some of that."

Lucas considers what she says, but like her, he's still looking for the why. "Why are you telling me this now?" He asks with no anger or frustration. The pride that had once stood in the way of his ability to act with maturity was no longer there and he was simply asking her because he wanted to know.

"I'm not using this as an excuse, just an explanation," Brooke tells him.

"But why?" Lucas repeats. "Why are you explaining this to me?"

Now he knows why he's asking. He's asking because he wants her to admit what she's scared to; that she wants to take back what she said. She wants to go back to the way it was before let her fears control her.

This time it's her pride that gets in the way. It's her pride and her inexperience in actually dealing with her emotions that cause her to look up and into his blue eyes, pleading for him not to make her say the words.

And she doesn't say anything. They just stare at each other for a while, trying to somehow convey what they want to say to each other without actually saying anything.

She almost smiles at one point when she realizes that this is one of those times when if her dad or Matt or even Rachel was there, they'd tell her to get over herself. They'd tell her because they know her better than anyone else; they know that not only should she say what she really feels, but she _can._ She's just _stubborn;_ stubborn to the point of ridiculousness.

She finally stops analyzing herself and breathes a sigh of relief when out of the corner she sees a woman approach the front door. She thinks that she's been unbelievably lucky since she's gotten to Tree Hill. Back home silences seem to linger far too long, and she's found herself in more than her fair share of awkward situations lately with not being able to give people the kind of answers they're looking for. But some tiny town in North Carolina that she guesses no one back home has ever heard of, she has to commend everyone for their impeccable sense of timing.

When Lucas turns around just in time to see his mother entering the café, he feels a sudden sense of sadness and guilt. A quick glance to the clock above the door tells him that it's more than a half an hour earlier than when she used to come to the café on Sundays. In fact, when he was little, she was never open on Sundays, but as he got older and became more independent she opened up on Sundays. Now with him living at his father's house for most of the time, he's noticed that she arrives at the café a little earlier and leaves a little later as the days and weeks and months pass by.

"Hey mom," Lucas greets her before she has a chance to question anything. He knows that she's not surprised to see him there as it's happened many times before when he gets for an early run. Instead he guesses that the look of curiosity on her face has more to do with the brunette sitting across from him.

"Morning," Karen responds and walks over to them.

"Mom, this is Brooke," Lucas introduces before Karen can get a question in. "Brooke, this is my mom, Karen."

"It's nice to meet you, I've heard some pretty incredible things about you from Lucas," Brooke says and stands to shake Karen's hand.

"Likewise," Karen says smiling, impressed with Brooke's genuine and not forced politeness. Brooke figures that Karen wouldn't guess that her notable conversation skills and etiquette with adults – a trait that she and her brother shared – was honed from years and years of events she attended with her parents.

"I was going to start to get things ready in the back, but you're both welcome to stay if you'd like."

"Thanks, but I should probably get going," Brooke says apologetically.

"Are you sure?" Lucas asks and she nods.

"I'll…talk to you soon, I guess," Brooke says and turns back to Karen. "It really was nice to meet you," she reiterates. Even though she's just met the woman, with everything that Lucas has told her, she already respects Karen.

She gives a small wave goodbye when she exits the café. Even the jingle of the doorbell in the otherwise quiet room fails to snap Lucas out of his trance as he watches her.

"Lucas?" Karen asks and finally gets his attention.  
"Yeah, sorry," he stutters quickly. "I'll meet you in the back in a minute, Ma," he says and leaves the café as well.

He reaches her just as she's opening her car door, and when he lightly grasps her arm she turns to him instantly.

"Luke, what are you doing?" she asks, suddenly feeling very exposed under his intense gaze.

He's staring at her crossing his fingers, hoping with everything he has that he read her right and what he's about to do won't screw things up further.

He kisses her. It's short and soft but meaningful, and when he pulls away Brooke's eyes remain closed for another second.

When she opens them he searches for some sort of reaction, good or bad he needs to know what she's thinking. She doesn't say anything, but the look in her eyes is happier than before. And then he sees the corners of her lips twitch up in the slightest of smiles. That's all he needs and now he's grinning like an idiot as he back away to allow her get into her car and drive away.

Seeing him so happily makes her smile brightly too, and when the dimples appear Lucas can feel his heart flutter for a moment.

_These feelings won't go away  
They've been knockin' me sideways  
I keep thinking in a moment that  
Time will take them away  
But these feelings won't go away_

* * *

When she got home the house was still silent. The paper was still sitting on the front porch and the coffee maker was off, so she figured her father was still sleeping.

She lazily made her way into the den and sat down on the couch before turning on the TV. It was funny to her that for the past week and a half she could get up and work out, or read, or do anything productive, but with the presence of her father upstairs, she reverted back into the lazy habits she had at home.

It had been just over a half an hour before Robert walked downstairs and was ready to leave the house, much to Brooke surprise.

"What are you doing?" Brooke asked her father after turning off the TV. He was standing in the doorway with a much more relaxed expression than she had seen the day before. She wasn't sure what had changed, or if this was really a façade to mask his still present anger, but she wasn't complaining because the way he was standing and the expression on his face gave Brooke a glimpse of the father she used to know.

"Well I have to leave tonight, so I figured I might as well make some use of my time here," he answered and motioned for her to follow him as he walked toward the kitchen.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I called an old friend and got us a tee time in two hours," he said as he looked through the refrigerator.

"Are you serious?" Brooke whined.

"Yes, I am, so go get dressed while I make breakfast. And don't take too long, I want some time at the range before we start."

Brooke grunted in complaint but headed upstairs anyway, knowing that her father wouldn't back down. She never really liked the sport, but had gotten roped in by her father and brother when she was seven by the promise of being allowed to drive the golf car. Ten years later and that promise was still bringing her back to the course.

* * *

_You know it ain't easy  
For these thoughts here to leave me  
There's no words to describe it  
In French or in English_

Brooke sat in the driver's seat of the small car, keeping herself busy by playing with the seams of the white glove on her left hand as she watched her father set up for his tee shot on the third hole.

So far they hadn't said much to each other yet that morning. Mostly his sporadic mentioning old memorable golf games he had at the club they were headed too. When they arrived he selected two sets of rental clubs for them to use. Yes, two; Brooke sighed just thinking about it. She never had the patience to learn the game her father and brother seemed to love so much, but today she knew better than to argue her playing.

Her father was good, even she had to admit. He had spent countless hours fine tuning his skills over the years; hours that only increased when he began to teach Matt how to play too. But Brooke never found interest in the sport besides the time it allowed her to spend with Matt.

She watched her father closely as he began his swing. Even back swing; relaxed but swift forward motion. Beautiful shot, she muttered to herself as she watched the straight away drive.

When Brooke set up for her tee shot, it was a different story. With no motivation for her to play the game, her arms felt dead and all she wanted to do was crawl back into bed with a pint of ice cream and talk to Rachel on the phone for hours. But instead she was here; perfect weather, beautiful course, no reason not to be having a good time. Except for the fact that a million different thoughts were running rampant through her mind, making it nearly impossible to focus on the small white ball in front of her.

"Brooke, you alright?" Robert asked, seeing her hesitance.

Brooke looked up at him and gave a weak smile. "Yeah, I'm fine."

It was quick after that. Look back down, set up the way he had taught you so many times, and then swing.

It was a decent shot; exceptional for someone who rarely played, but it didn't provide any satisfaction for Brooke who put her club away and took a long swig from her bottle of water before hitting the gas pedal and heading to where her shot landed.

Two holes later and not much had improved. They were still quiet; too quiet for a leisurely Sunday round of golf. And now Brooke could start to feel him watching her as if he was trying to figure out what she was thinking; as if he was trying to find the right words to say to her.

It was beginning to drive her crazy. Had they been back home, she probably would have snapped at him already. Probably something along the lines of 'either spit it out or stop staring,' then waited two seconds for an answer, and when none came she would have stormed back to her room.

But this was neither the time nor the place for her short temper to kick in. Another one of those oh-so-adoring qualities she knew she got from her mother. She had one hell of a temper and far too short of a fuse to set it off.

_Well, diamonds they fade  
And flowers they bloom  
And I'm telling you_

"Brooke?"  
She snapped her head around to face him, eyes blazing in anger that fought to calm.

"I think it's time we stopped this nonsense and started talking," he told her as he scooped up his ball with the back of his putter and motioned for her to follow him back to the car. Reluctantly she followed, even though she would have much rather run in the opposite direction.

"About what?" Brooke asked coldly. Maybe that wasn't the best way to start off the conversation but renewed anger was coursing through her, and even though there was no reason for it, it was still a commanding force.

"About a few things," Robert said as he sat in the driver's seat of the car, forcing Brooke to sit on the passenger side so that she could focus on listening instead of driving. "Mainly some sort of resolution."

"Fine," Brooke sighed as she slouched back into her seat and put her feet up on the dashboard.

"First of all I have some questions," Robert started. "Not the serious emotional stuff that I know you would bite my head off for, but some more…basic stuff."

"Like?"

"Like how you managed to pay for everything to fix up the house without having me find out."

Brooke sighed and straightened up. "Clearly you don't remember, but grandma set up five bank accounts for us. One for each grandkid and another to buy stuff for the house whenever we needed to. I used the money from that account, that's why you didn't find out."

Robert turned and looked at her with raised eyebrows, not really sure if he should be appalled by her secret actions or impressed by her resourcefulness and maturity that she showed in being on her own. "Alright," he finally gave in and got up for his next tee shot.

"Next question," Brooke started the conversation up again as they waited at the next hole for the group ahead of them to finish.

"What have you been doing down here?" he asked with utter confusion.

Brooke let out a small chuckle. Even though she knew that the question was serious, they both knew that the tone was used to lighten it up a bit.

"Thinking. Lots and lots of thinking."

"That's it?" He asked, knowing that there was definitely more.

"And exercising; morning runs and afternoon laps in the pool. Stuff like that."

"Uh uh," he nodded. "And what about _Lucas_?"

"What about Lucas?" Brooke countered and tried to hide her slight blush that wasn't there from the run and steadily rising temperature.

"An explanation would be nice."

"Fine," Brooke playfully relented. "I met him when I first got here. He's actually pretty great."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, I think you'd like him," Brooke smiled. "Anyway, do you remember Nathan and Peyton?"

"Vaguely, yes."

"Well he's really good friends with them, actually he's Nathan's brother," Brooke said and quickly continued before Robert could get a word in, "so I got in touch with them again which is nice because now I'm not completely alone down here. You and I both know I like my alone time, but if I didn't have them I would _really_ be alone and, I don't know, I'd need to get a dog or something to keep me sane," Brooke rambled, "but lucky for me, I have them and it's been pretty nice; not as lonely as you would think."

Robert nodded but stayed silent.

"You're not going to say anything?" Brooke asked after he stood up to set up for his shot without saying anything.

"I'm thinking," he told her. "Give me a few minutes."

* * *

"Okay, this is ridiculous," Brooke said as they walked back into the house hours later. "It's been forever and you still have told me what you're thinking."

Throughout the rest of their golf game he successfully avoided discussing what he was thinking about. Instead they managed to get back to a semi-normal conversation for the rest of the after noon.

"Hello? Dad! Are you listening to me?" Brooke asked as she set two water bottles out in front of them at the kitchen table.

"Yes," he said and took a seat across from her. "Are you happy here? Is being here what you want?"

"Yeah," Brooke said softly and gave him a small smile. "It's…helping me."

"Okay," he said and nodded. "Then you can stay."

"I can?" Brooke asked incredulously.

"Yes, but there are some conditions."

"Of course there are."

"Hey," he warned her. "I'm being nice here so no attitude."

"Fine."

"Good," he continued. "I know you're a teenager and you like to have your fun or whatever, but I'm trusting you to be responsible, Brooke. I'm trusting you to come to me if anything goes wrong or you need something."

"Okay."

"You also need to call more. Both me _and_ your mother."

"Dad," Brooke dragged out the word in a whine.

"Don't 'dad' me now," he said. "I mean it. I expect to hear from you frequently. And as for mom, well that one is up to you for the way you handle it, but I expect you to check with her at least once a week. I don't care if you make up some stories about all the great stuff your learning this summer in your courses, but you need to speak to her, civilly might I add. I know it doesn't always seem like it, but she still cares…she's just having a hard time with…with everything."

Brooke let out a long breath. "Fine."

"One last thing."

"What?" Brooke asked with exasperation.

"Please don't let me find out that you've been spending the summer playing house with Lucas."

"Dad!"

"Would you relax? I'm sure he's nice and great just like you said, but….just be careful. With your heart…with everything."

"Dad, you know I will be."

"I know, but I still have to say it."

_And I'm telling you  
These feelings won't go away  
They've been knockin' me sideways  
They've been knockin' me out lately  
Whenever you come around me_

"Do you have everything?" Brooke asked as she walked out onto the front porch with her father. It was five o'clock and still very warm, but Brooke somehow chilled as she watched her father walk outside with his ticket in one hand and his overnight bag in the other.

"Yes, Brooke."

"Sorry, I was just checking!" Brooke yelled with playfulness. "Are you sure you don't want me to drive you to the airport?" She asked with more seriousness as she stole a glance at the cab that was waiting at the sidewalk.

"Oh you know me, I always preferred watching the cab drive down the street rather than the tearful goodbye at the gate," he joked, making Brooke smile as they remember the nights they would stay up late watching movies together, always making fun of the cheesiest parts.

"Well then I guess this is it."

"What are you talking about, 'it'?" he asked. "You sound morbid and a bit like the scene we love to poke fun at. Lighten up Brookie; I'll speak to you soon."

Brooke grinned thankfully at her father for always knowing what to say to make her feel better.

"Well then what are you waiting for? Get outa here."

"What? No hug for daddio?"

Brooke rolled her eyes but went to hug him anyway. "I'm definitely not going to miss your sense of humor."

"I think you will."

"Maybe," Brooke shrugged as they released their hug. "I love you, dad."

"I love you too, Brooke," he said and gave her a kiss on the head and a warm smile before heading to his waiting cab.

After the car turned the corner and was no longer in sight Brooke turned and headed back inside. Maybe, just maybe, she thought, everything could be when she went back home.

* * *

"I'm tellin' you Luke, if this kid's freakout wasn't so scary it would have been funny," Nathan said of one of the games he played in as a freshman. They were trading stories about the weirdest things that had happened to them on the court.

"Can we please not talk about basketball for like two seconds?" Peyton cut in, having enough of the sport. It was bad enough when the season was going on, but during the summer she couldn't handle it.

"I agree!" Haley chimed in.

"Well then what do you suggest we talk about?" Jake asked.

"Brooke," Nathan said.

"What?" Lucas tilted his head to the side. "What are you talking about?"

"Brooke just walked in," Nathan pointed to the door of the cafe.

Lucas turned around and gave her a smile as he waved her over and pulled out a chair for her to join them.

"So is your dad still here?" Lucas asked.

"Your dad's here?" Peyton asked.

"Not anymore. He's on a flight back to New York now."

"That was quick," Nathan commented.

"Wait," Lucas cut in. "He's letting you stay?"

Brooke smiled up at him. "He's letting me stay."

_These feelings won't go away  
They've been knockin' me sideways  
I keep thinking in a moment that  
Time will take them away  
But these feelings won't go away_

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Going back over it now, I realized that I changed tenses a bit throughout this chapter. It annoys me and it doesn't make for the best writing, but since I'm supposed to be studying now, I don't have time to go back and change it all. Sorry 'bout that.**

**Please review.  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	10. A NotSoPleasant Night

**Hey everyone!**

**Since Tuesday of last week I have been done with school!! Thank god! I know what you're thinking now, if I've been done for eight days, why has it taken so long for me to update? Well there are a few reasons. The first is that all of the errands that I didn't have time to do while I was still in school were all accomplished in the past few days, so that took up a big chunk of my time. Then I just got lazy and was very uninspired to write. Finally I had a lot of trouble writing the second half of this chapter. While I knew what I wanted to happen, it was unusually hard to _make_ it happen. My request to avoid this next time is for all of my wonderful readers to leave suggestions/requests/ideas. I would really appreciate the input.  
**

**Thanks for the amazing reviews last chapter! Especially **BroodyGirl23, CheeryFan, **and **Yaba.

**The song in this chapter is "Everything is Alright" by Motion City Soundtrack.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

Tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.

* * *

Give me a reason to end this discussion,  
To break with tradition.  
To fold and divide.

_"Just stop!" she yells, her voice reaching a blood curdling scream. "Just stop talking to me and get out of my room!"_

_The anger was pulsating through her veins but somewhere deep in the back of her head she was somewhat aware of the consequences her actions would have. That consciousness was there only because this had happened too many times before for her not to know what was going to happen._

_What she wasn't aware of was the music turning off down the hall and the quick footsteps headed towards the room._

_"What the hell is going on in here?"_

_Brooke looked past her mother to see Matt standing in the doorway with an annoyed and disappointed look on his face._

_"Just back off," Brooke says through gritted teeth, staring directly at her mother. Standing tall and inches apart with fire in their eyes, the Davis women were a force to be reckoned with. If Matt didn't know better he'd think a fist fight would break out._

_"Mom, what is going on here?" He asks. "What could you two possibly be fighting about this time?"_

_"It's none of your business Matt, just tell her to get the fuck away from me."_

_"Do not talk to me like that!" Her mother finally joined back in the yelling._

_"I wasn't talking to you," Brooke gave her mother a hateful smile, grabbed her cell phone off the kitchen counter and headed straight for the front door._

_Matt sighed and sent an apologetic look to their mother before following Brooke._

_"Brooke, wait!" Matt calls after her. He only caught up to her because she had to wait for the elevator in the hallway._

_He gets to her just as the elevator lets out the high pitched 'ding' and opens. So he reaches and grabs her arm, not tight enough to hurt her, but just enough to stop her from fully entering the elevator._

_She turns back to him with such anger in her eyes that it scares him for a moment, and when she tries to pull herself out of his grip, his hand slides down her arm but grasps her wrist just in time to stop her._

_"Let go of me," she growls._

_"Don't leave, Brooke, just stop." Matt pleads with her. He can't let her go; it's already pretty late and he knows that if he doest she'll do the same thing he would do if he was that angry or upset. She'll walk quickly to Rachel's just like he would to his friend Johnny's, and she'll drink until her problems don't hurt as much anymore. Even though he's trying to stop her from doing the same thing he does, it's okay for him to do it, but not for her to._

_He has to stop her because he's 23 and she's 16._

_"Let go of me!" he voice rises this time and his grip on her wrist tightens. He wonders briefly if the neighbors can hear them, because even though they're far from perfect, everyone in the Park Avenue building loves the Davis kids._

_He knows right away that tightening his grip was a bad idea because now Brooke starts to physically fight back._

_He's holding her left wrist so she turns her body to face him and pushes off with her right hand._

_She really doesn't push that hard, but Matt releases her and recoils immediately, doubling over and holding his stomach._

_She takes an unconscious step backwards in horror, accidentally placing her inside the elevator and away from the sensors in the door that were previously keeping it open._

_She knows exactly what she did._

_She didn't mean to. She just wanted to get away. So she pushed. But it was where she pushed; right at the spot that he takes his medical injections in._

_Matt looks up at her through his own anger and physical pain but doesn't say anything; they just stare at each other silently as the elevator door closes between them._

Cause I hate the ocean, theme parks and airplanes,  
Talking with strangers, waiting in line..  
I'm through with these pills that make me sit still.  
"Are you feeling fine?"  
Yes, I feel just fine.  
Tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.

* * *

I'm sick of the things I do when I'm nervous  
Like cleaning the oven or checking my tires  
Or counting the number of tiles in the ceiling..  
Head for the hills, the kitchen's on fire!

It's not the most pleasant way to wake up.

You're gasping for air as your eyes shoot open and your head lifts from the pillow. Vivid flashes of the nightmare you just had repeat uncontrollably in of your eyes as you try to regain a steady breath.

The feeling is similar to tripping and your body catching itself right before it falls because you can feel every muscle in your body tightening and every nerve being called to attention at the same time.

But for Brooke, before she could even relax again another feeling settled in and without taking another breath she jumped up out of bed and headed straight for the bathroom.

Lucas, who had previously been sleeping soundly beside her, opened his eyes just in time to see the bathroom light flick on and the door slam shut.

"Brooke?" He asked softly after tiredly making his way to the closed door. "Brooke?" he asks again before lightly knocking.

Inside she's shaking her head silently pleading him to stop talking. She can't speak. It takes too much energy and she fears that if she changes one thing about what she's doing at the moment, the nausea will take over.

"Brooke, what's going on?" Lucas asks and inside Brooke clenches her eyes shut and breathes in deeply through her nose.

She holds her breath and tries not to move a single muscle in her body when she hears Lucas slowly open the door.

"Brooke, are you alright?" He knows it's a stupid question; she's obviously not alright, but he asks anyway because he doesn't know what else to day. He doesn't know what to make of the way she woke up or her quick exit, or the way she's leaning over the sink, gripping the edge of the counter so tightly that her knuckles have turned white.

No, she shakes her head and blinks back tears. She exhales quickly through her nose before sucking in another large breath of air.

And suddenly the urge the throw up is gone and she's not as scared anymore. But when she releases her grip on the marble and her hands won't stop shaking, she doesn't really care about the consequences of her next actions.

Without another word she opens the mirrored cabinet above the sink and reaches straight for the proverbial orange bottle.

"Brooke?" Lucas asks again with the concern evident in his voice. For a moment she had forgotten he was standing there, and now all she really wants to do is turn to him and bite back with something along the lines of _'is that the only word you can say tonight?'_

But she doesn't because she doesn't want Lucas to see that side of her; the side that's always angry and unhappy and practically looking for a verbal fight.

She doesn't yell at him, but she doesn't open the bottle either. It's not by choice though. Her breathing is so uneven that she's becoming dizzy and her still shaking hands can't seem to take off the white cap and release the tiny pills she so desperately wants.

"Brooke stop!" Lucas pleads with her but she doesn't stop her frantic and useless movements. He's not even sure if she's trying to open it anymore because he figures that if she was really trying then she would have succeeded by now, but it doesn't matter because all he really wants is for her stop. He's seen the affects of Deb's pill popping habits enough to know that the way she's taking them won't solve her problems.

And when she finally stops she weakly throws the bottle into the sink and slides down to the floor with her back to the wall; her elbows on her bent knees and her head in her hands.

It takes a few seconds for Lucas to sit down next to her, and when he does he decides against wrapping an arm around her shoulders like he would normally do. With everything he's just seen he's not sure if immediate contact is the best thing for her. In fact he's not sure what would be best for her at all. Her father's been gone for about a week and they're already back to practically playing house – just going with the flow of things as they had called it all – but he has never seen anything remotely close to this. He's completely freaked out by everything that has just happened and he has no idea what to do about any of it.

So instead of talking about what just happened they just sit together on the floor of the bathroom.

It's silent except for the sounds of their breathing and Brooke's has evened out so much that Lucas thinks she's sleeping. He doesn't know for sure though because he's too afraid to look over at her.

"What time is it?"

It's quiet and mumbled a bit, and Lucas takes so long to process the words that when he's ready to answer he's not sure if she had actually said anything because the silence has engulfed them both again.

It's not until he looks over at her for confirmation that he sees her looking back at him, and then he knows that she had in fact asked.

"It's uh, a little before three," he stutters out.

Brooke turns back to look straight ahead and Lucas is beyond surprised when he hears her let out the smallest of chuckles.

_She couldn't possible think this is funny, could she?_ Lucas asks himself.

_It's July 3rd_, Brooke thinks and the corners of her mouth twitch up in a small relieved smile. "Rachel's coming today."

I used to rely on self-medication,  
I guess I still do that from time to time.  
But I'm getting better at fighting the future,  
"Someday you'll be fine.."  
Yes, I'll be just fine.

* * *

"Tree fucking Hill."

Brooke takes her eyes off the road for a moment and looks at the red head in the passenger seat and just laughs.

"Someone's a little bitchy today," Brooke says and smiles. _God it feels good to have her there._

It's true and Rachel knows it so she just smiles. She holds back a correcting comment about it being crankiness more than anything else because she had to get up early for one of the first flights of the day from New York to North Carolina.

Her original plan was to arrive at 4, not 10:30, but a text message at three in the morning had changed her schedule.

Brooke is like her family; a sister that she trusts with her life and all its secrets or scandals. She knows her well enough to be able to read the urgency in a text message even if she's half sleeping.

"So when are you going to tell me what the hell is going on here?" Rachel asks, never one to beat around the bush. She tells it like it is. Asks the questions that need to be asked. Says what's on her mind.

"I was thinking we should discuss that by the pool over some strong alcohol," Brooke says, keeping her eyes on the road.

Rachel whips her head around from looking out the window and stares at Brooke.

"That bad?" She asks shocked. She had helped Brooke stay away from alcohol in the weeks before she had left New York, and as far as she knew, Brooke hadn't been drinking in Tree Hill either. But there was a seriousness and tiredness in her voice in that moment that Rachel wouldn't hold the booze back from.

Brooke turns and glances at Rachel before gluing her eyes back to the road.

"That bad."

Tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.

* * *

They got home a little while later after making a pit stop at a liquor store just outside of town. Despite the overwhelming and exhausting emotions running through her body, Rachel had managed to cheer her up with a few rants about how annoying it was to see an American flag "hanging outside of every goddamn house in North Carolina!"

Rachel never really was one for holidays.

A note on the door tells Brooke that Lucas is gone and would be back with everyone else for dinner that night which relieves her even further because she was far from ready to talk to him about what had happened in the middle of the night.

She had left to get Rachel before he had woken up. After they got back into bed early that morning Brooke had fallen asleep faster than she had expected. Even with all of the thoughts running rampant in her mind, her not-so-small break down had drained her of any energy she had to keep her awake. She figured that Lucas had been up most of the night after that though because she when she woke up every so often, he always had his eyes open and was staring at the ceiling.

He fell asleep eventually though, and Brooke decided to let him sleep in when she left. It was more selfish than caring and she knew it. She didn't want to talk any of the events that had taken place, so she left when he was still out like a light, leaving a note that apologized for everything and said that she hoped to still see him and everyone else that night for dinner to meet Rachel.

"Let's get this party started, shall we?" Brooke looked up to see Rachel sauntering down the stairs after settling in to one guest rooms. She would probably end up sleeping in the master bedroom with Brooke after their late night talks, but she settled in the guest room anyway.

"Why not?" Brooke shrugged and grabbed the tray of drinks, glasses, and any other necessary ingredients.

* * *

Give me a reason (I don't believe a word)  
To end this discussion (of anything I've heard)  
To break with tradition (they tell me that it's not so hard)  
To fold and divide (it's not so hard)  
So let's not get carried (away with everything)  
Away with the process (from here to in-between)  
of elimination (the long goodbye)  
I don't want to waste your time.

The buzz from their early afternoon drinks has worn off by the time they start making dinner. They're in the kitchen cooking, singing the words to the 90s boy band song that blasts through the speakers and it feels like old times. The times when Brooke didn't completely dread going back home and their biggest worries weren't anything like they were now.

Rachel's pulling most of the weight in the kitchen and Brooke takes care of the menial tasks to help out, but they both put whatever tools their using down in time to turn to each other and belt out the chorus of the current song.

When the song begins to fade out they dance back to their spots at the counter and only stop when a loud and slow clapping quickly pulls abruptly pulled them out of their reverie.

"Wow, Brooke," Nathan grinned from the doorway, "Don't quit your day job."

"Shut up!" Brooke yelled through her embarrassment. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough."

"Ugh!" Brooke groaned at the smirk on his face which only grew when he dodged a piece of a carrot that flew his way. "Seriously, how long have you two been here?"

"Not that long," Haley assured Brooke and went around the corner to start helping her.

"Whatever," Brooke muttered. "You better watch your back tonight, Scott."

Nathan held his hands up in mock surrender before reaching into the salad that Brooke was working on and picked out another carrot.

"So you must be the famous Rachel," Nathan said as he took a seat at one of the bar stools.

"The one and only," Rachel gave him a seductive smile.

"Hey," Brooke nudged Rachel. "No hitting on these guys, I can spot your flirting from a mile away."

"Fine," Rachel sighed over-dramatically. "They will be plenty more to corrupt tomorrow."

Brooke rolled her eyes and turned her attention to Haley. "So where's everyone else?"

"Peyton and Jake are on their way."

"Oh. And Lucas?" Brooke asked, trying to hide her nervousness. No one caught on except for Rachel who rolled her eyes and lightly slapped Brooke upside the head.

"Hey!"

"Um, he said he would be a little light," Haley said. Lucas hadn't been in the best mood when she had seen him last.

"Dan wanted to talk to him about god only knows what," Nathan elaborated while attempting to steal another piece of food.

"That does not sound good," Haley said shaking her head.

"You know what doesn't sound good?" They turned at the sound of Peyton's voice to see her covering her ears and Jake laughing, standing next to her in the doorway. "This music! Jeeze Brooke, are you trying to make my ears bleed or something?"

"Relax Peyt, Backstreet Boys is nothing, you should of heard them belting out O- Town before you came in," Nathan said with a cheeky grin, ducking as soon as the words left his mouth in preparation for some sort of salad vegetable to come flying his way. Fortunately for him none of the deadly vegetables were launched.

"What's going on in here?" They all turned back again to see Lucas walking up.

"Nothing, if your brother knows what's good for him," Brooke said eying Nathan.

"Okay then."

"Forget it man," Nathan insisted. "It's about time you showed up, what happened with Dan?"

"Oh the usual," Lucas tried to wave it off, but Nathan knew better. The usual more than likely meant Dan pressuring Lucas to be more like Nathan; work harder and be a better son. Both boys knew that they were of equal caliber when it came to basketball, and on some level they figured that Dan knew that too but that didn't stop Dan from making up for lost time in the overbearing department.

Nathan's eyes grew darker with realization after looking at his watch; he knew that it was probably worse than usual. Not only had Dan caught drift of the amount of time Lucas had been spending with Brooke, but based on the time that day, Dan probably had a scotch or two in him and that made everything worse for both of them.

"How about we all sit down for dinner now?" Haley suggested before Nathan and Lucas found themselves too deep in Dan's drama.

"I think that sounds perfect," Nathan said smiling as he grabbed one of the large bowls of food, wrapped an arm around Haley's shoulders and headed to the kitchen.

* * *

Tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.

Lucas wasn't really sure what to think of what he was watching now. They ate dinner outside on the large back porch and as they were cleaning up afterward Nathan found a bag of old water balloons in one of the kitchen drawers, proceeded to fill all of them up, and now he and Jake were chasing Brooke, Peyton, and Haley through the back yard.

To anyone else it seemed like the perfect summer evening. But to Lucas it was too perfect for what he had witnessed early that morning.

"Nice scene, isn't it?" Lucas jumped from his position leaning against the wooden column and turned to see Rachel approaching him.

"Yeah," Lucas replied hesitantly and looked back to the yard.

Rachel leaned against the column opposite Lucas and looked at him for a second before bringing her eyes back to the running Brooke in the distance.

"So here's the deal," Rachel started. Lucas looked over at her curiously but she kept her eyes on Brooke. "For the next two minutes I'm going to play the over protective best friend, okay?" Rachel turned and waited for Lucas to nod. When he did, she turned her head back to everyone else and continued. "Everything we say here stays between us. I'm going to be honest with you, and you're going to be honest with me. _Completely_ honest."

Lucas nodded, "okay," he tried not to show his discomfort. Rachel was stone cold. Intimidation clearly came easy for her.

Finally Rachel adjusted her position so that her whole body was facing Lucas.

"What is Brooke to you?"

"Excuse me?"

"What is she?" Rachel asked again. "Is she a summer fling or just good sex?"

"No!" Lucas replied immediately, slightly appalled and confused to how that question made Rachel a good friend.

"Well then what is it?"

"It's more than that," Lucas admitted quietly.

"How?" Rachel asked incredulously but then composed herself quickly so not to draw attention. "I mean you guys barely know each other and somehow," she started up again and threw her arms up in despair, "all this has happened!"

"I thought I knew her," Lucas said softly and immediately Rachel's demeanor softened.

"Until this morning," Rachel finished for him with a sigh. "Look, the reason why I'm asking is because if I tell you what I think you should know, then I need to know that it's not going to scare you away."

"It won't."

"How do you know?"

"Because I—" He stopped himself short. "It won't."

Rachel stayed silent for a moment, watching Lucas for any clue to what he was thinking. When she couldn't find any she took a deep breath and her posture visibly softened.

"She doesn't like telling people that she's not okay which is why you have no idea about what happened this morning," Rachel started. "She hates to admit that she's not alright. 'Fine' seemed to be her favorite word this year. Don't let that fool you though, because if you're one of the lucky few who can get through to her – and I think you are – it's definitely worth it."

Lucas nodded. "So how do I get through to her?"

"That's the hard part," Rachel said. "She has to know that you're there for her, but at the same time you can't push her. If you keep telling her the same thing over and over again, she'll snap. At you or just…snap."

Lucas nodded again, not really sure of what to say to her. Truthfully every time the silence took over between them his mind drifted off to the look in Brooke's eyes that night. Although she was having fun with everyone else, whenever their eyes met he saw shame and embarrassment.

It killed him that she could barely look him in the eye. All he wanted was to help her. He just didn't know how to.

"Crap," Rachel muttered when Brooke looked over at them curiously. "This conversation never happened."

Before Lucas could even respond, Rachel was making her way down the steps and into the backyard with a small cooler of alcohol that he didn't realize she had with her.

Brooke momentarily took herself out of the water fight to grab a drink from Rachel.

"What was that about?" Brooke asked, trying to sound nonchalant as she fished around the cooler.

"He's just worried about you Brooke."

Brooke stayed silent.

"I know you don't want to talk about it with him, but he deserves an explanation, don't you think?"

Again, silence.

"Come on Brooke! Cut the bullshit," Rachel called her out flatly. "What? Are you embarrassed?"

Brooke shrugged.

"That guy is obviously in love with you—" Brooke cut her off with a scoff. "What's so funny? He is. Maybe you can't see it right now because you're irrationally afraid of telling him what happened this morning but I can and I think that hiding, which is exactly what you're doing right now, is really stupid."

"Rach." The vulnerability was peaking through.

"I don't care Brooke. I actually like Lucas, and if you screw whatever you have going on with Lucas up because of one bad night, then you have more issues than I thought you did," Rachel said coldly but softened when she saw how scared her friend looked. "Just talk to him," she whispered and walked away in time for Brooke to see Lucas tentatively approaching.

"Hey," he said softly.

Her last walls instantly fell.

"Can we talk?" He asked nervously, afraid to overstep the line. He had no idea where the lines laid anymore; if they had disappeared over the last week of getting closer or if there were some things that he still had to stay out of.

"Yeah."

He hadn't stepped too far yet.

"Let's go," Brooke took his hand and led him to the hammocks on the other side of the pool.

Tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.

* * *

_She never made it out of the lobby. She just took a seat on one of the large couches and sat there, not moving until she felt someone sit down next to her._

_He didn't say anything. He was going to make her speak first. _

_"I'm sorry," she whispered and he looked over at her surprised. It usually took much longer to get her to apologize, but when he looked into her eyes, he saw that she was apologizing for what she did to him rather than the mess she caused with their mother._

_"Yeah, I know."_

_"Are you okay?"_

_"Yeah, it's not a big deal."_

_They both knew he was lying. He always lied to her about this. He never wanted her to worry. But she did. She always did._

_"I'm sorry," she repeated._

_"I know," he repeated with a small crack of a smile._

_A deafening silence took over._

_"Do we have to talk about it?"_

_"You know we do."_

_"Whatever," she tried to brush it off._

_"Brooke," he reprimanded. "Come on," he softened. "You're almost seventeen. You can't keep doing this."_

_"Why not?"_

_"Because you and I both know that it's not healthy."_

_"Yeah? Well you and I both know that you argued with mom just as much when you were my age."_

_"I definitely argued with her, but not like this."  
"Whatever."_

_"Is that the only comeback you have tonight?"_

_"Maybe," she bit back a smile._

_"Look, I know you don't want to, but will you please go and tell mom you're sorry."_

_"But I'm not. She was driving me crazy."_

_"Doesn't matter."_

_"Like hell it does."_

_"Hey! Cool it."_

_Brooke rolled her eyes._

_"I'm just," she stopped to think about her words. "I'm just so angry at her all the time."_

_"It'll get better."_

_"When?" She begged to know the answer. "I'm so tired of this."_

_"Then stop it."_

_"I can't!"_

_"Why not?"  
"I just can't."_

_"That's not an answer."_

_"It is to me!"_

_"Hey! Can we keep the attitude to a minimum here?"_

_She sighed._

_"I'll make you a deal."_

_"I'm listening."_

_"We hang out here for a while and cool off, and then later you go apologize."_

_"Fine," she gave up. "But you know I don't want to."_

_"I know."_

_"Good."_

_"Good."_

_He smiled at her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer to him to kiss the side of her head._

_"I love you Brookie."_

_"I love you too Matty."_

* * *

Tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!! I need them for inspiration if you want me to update quickly.  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	11. You're Stronger Than That

**Hey everyone!**

**There were a lot less reviews for last chapter, and that has seriously put a damper on my motivation to write this story. Please leave me reviews!!  
**

**Thanks for the amazing reviews last chapter! Especially **PurelyLilly4, BroodyGirl23, **and **Yaba.

**A HUGE thanks to **Storyteller247**, and one other person. I'm really sorry, but I accidentally deleted the e-mail and I can't remember the name, but you PM-ed me and i promised you this chapter by today. So thanks to you both, because you kicked me back into writing gear.**

**This chapter is a bit shorter than the others, but like I said, I'm lacking with the inspiration and motivation at the moment. Some great reviews would definitely help that.**

**Oh, and even though I didn't use a song for this chapter, the ones I was listening to when I wrote most of it were "Least Complicated" and "Power of Two" by Indigo Girls.**

**Last but definitely not least, I haven't been getting e-mails from since yesterday. No alerts or anything. Does anyone know how to fix this?? Thanks.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

_It was hard but she knew she had to do it, so she carefully explained it all. The nightmares, the memory, and even the pills. _

_"Any questions?" Brooke asked. Her tone said it was no big deal, but her eyes showed her real feelings. Nervousness. Grief. Shame._

_He was tempted to ask if she was okay, but after his conversation with Rachel he knew that it would probably do more harm than good._

_"Why do you keep them?" He asked after a long silence, during which Brooke was contemplating the most discrete way to leave, run inside, and lock herself in her bedroom._

_"Keep what?"_

_  
"The pills," Lucas said. "If they've caused so much damage already, why keep them around?"_

_Brooke shrugged slightly not knowing exactly how to describe the complicated relationship she had with Xanax. _

_"For times like last night," Brooke finally spoke again, "usually I don't have someone else with me, so they end up as the only way to calm me down."_

_"But you __don't__ need them."_

_"God you sound like Rachel," Brooke rolled her eyes. With Rachel's extremely lenient stance on recreational drugs, alcohol, and other questionable activities, Brooke was surprised to learn that the redhead held such a strong objection to prescription drugs and psychotherapy, both of which Brooke used that year. _

_"Is that a bad thing?" Lucas asked and continued without waiting for a response. "You don't need them, Brooke. You're stronger than you think."_

_"No I'm not. Look, I'm not proud of what happened, and I'm definitely not proud of the fact that I need those pills, but—"_

_"Yes, you are," Lucas said slowly and assuredly. "Everything I've learned about you, everything I know you've been through has shown me that you're a hell of a lot stronger than you think you are."_

_"Fine," Brooke sat up straight. "Let's say you're right and I get rid of them. What do I do when I really _need_ them? What do I have to fall back on?"_

_  
"Me."_

_Brooke shook her head sadly. "You're not always going to be there Lucas."_

_Lucas huffed in response. She was right. He wouldn't be there in the fall when Brooke went back to her senior year of high school and had to deal with everything once again._

_"Maybe that's true," Lucas finally spoke. "Maybe I won't be there, and maybe it's not even my place to be saying this, but I just…I wish you didn't think that you needed them. I wish you saw yourself the way I see you."_

_"I wish I did too, Lucas," Brooke said and brought her hand up to his cheek softly. "I wish I did, and I wish I could be as strong as you think I am, but right now…I can't be."_

_"Brooke…" Lucas pleaded with her not to give up on what he was asking of her._

_"Last night when I woke up, it was one of the worst feelings I've experienced all year, okay? I really just want to forget about it."_

_He didn't want to. He wanted to sit there and hash it out until he could prove to her that she didn't need to be dependent on meds to help her through the hard times, but she had opened up to him more than she was comfortable with already, and she was pleading with him to let it go._

_"Okay," he finally whispered. He knew it was the wrong decision, but it was too late. He already said the words._

* * *

She could remember distinctly that the place she was sitting in now used to be her favorite to be when she needed to be alone. She never locked herself in her room or when where no one could find her. She found a place in the house where people could always find her but knew never to bother her.

On the second floor in the wide hallway there was a large window that looked out past the front of the house and out onto the neighborhood. When she was younger she would stand in front of that window for what seemed like hours and just watch. Even if there was nothing going on or no one passing by, she would stare out the window until her eyes were so tired that she fell asleep on the hard wood floor right there.

The summer after she turned twelve she arrived in North Carolina to find a small but significant change to the Davis house.

By that second story window her grandmother had a small but nicely sized bench built. It was cushioned and had a few pillows scattered on it; perfect for Brooke's use.

So that's where she found herself yet again. Another summer. Another problem to deal with.

This time though, it was a bit more complicated.

"It's a nice sight, isn't it?" Brooke turned around to see Rachel behind her with two mugs of coffee.

"Yeah," Brooke took one of the cups and turned back to the window for a moment. Across the street a group of kids were having a water balloon fight with appropriately colored red white and blue balloons.

"I wouldn't mind joining them," Rachel said as she settled herself down across from Brooke. "It _way_ too hot down here for me."

"Yeah, it's pretty brutal," Brooke said. Although the heat and humidity of the congested city that they were used to seemed pretty bad, they were unprepared for the heat of North Carolina. In the summer time it was all heat all the time.

When Rachel didn't come back with a smart comment, Brooke turned to her to see her eyes closed leaning back against the wall.

"Tired?"

Rachel wordlessly nodded her head.

"Me too."

"You sleep okay last night?"

"It was dece," Brooke shrugged. "I woke up at like four thirty, but I fell right back to sleep."

Rachel quickly did the calculations in her head. After talking while eating three different kinds of ice cream, they had fallen asleep around two. By now it was nearly eleven and that amount of sleep satisfied Rachel, so she dropped the subject.

"You okay?" Rachel asked nonchalantly to mask her concern.

"Yeah," Brooke said and turned toward Rachel. "I guess, I mean, it's hard, you know?"

"What's hard?"

"Everything," Brooke said pessimistically. "Mostly it's just that every time I feel like I'm making progress, something happens to push me back again."

The night before they had talked about Lucas, Tree Hill, what she was doing, what was going on in New York and so much more, but hadn't mentioned this.

It reminded Rachel of that past November. Brooke's tearful breakdown in the girls' locker room during their last period free had been the wake up call for Rachel to see how bad things really were with her best friend. She knew the pressure Brooke was under from her family, and at that point she had known about Matt's condition for a few weeks, but she didn't realize how close snapping Brooke was.

_"Brooke?" Rachel called out as she pushed the heavy door open and entered the locker room. "Brooke?" Rachel called out again as she navigated her way around the rows of lockers to find Brooke's._

_Sitting on the bench in front of it, dissolved in tears, Brooke was sobbing._

_"Brooke, what's wrong?" Rachel asked worriedly as she quickly sat down next to her best friend and wrapped her arm around her shoulders._

_"I'm drowning, Rach," Brooke choked out._

_"Drowning? Brooke, what are you talking about?"_

_"I just can't do this anymore."_

_"Do what anymore?" Rachel raised her voice a bit. "_What_ are you talking about?!"_

_"I'm so tired," Brooke mumbled and a sudden flash of images passed through Rachel's head. The ever present rings under Brooke's eyes, her falling asleep in English class last week, the pissy mood she got in anytime someone mentioned grades, and the evenings Brooke would spend at her house because she didn't want to go home.. "It's just getting_ _harder and harder. Everything is going downhill and I can't stop it."_

_"Yes you can Brooke," Rachel said even though she wasn't quite sure what Brooke was talking about. _

_"No I can't!" Brooke's full on cries had subsided and now she was left with a few strangled sobs as she tried to control herself. "Every time I try to make things better, every time I work harder to make it all better it just gets worse. I can't breathe anymore, Rach. I feel like I'm drowning."  
_Rachel shook off the memory and focused on Brooke again.

"Come on, Brooke," Rachel said with slight disappointment. "Do you remember what you said to me when you first suggested coming down here?" Rachel asked and waited a moment for a response. When she didn't get one, she continued even though she knew that Brooke knew the answer. "You told me that this was what was best for you. That this would help you heal and that even though there would be days when everything would fall to pieces, in the end you would come back better than before. Maybe not fully healed, but better than before."

"Yeah, I know, it's just…"

"I know."

Brooke nodded and focused back on the water fight across the street.

"So," Rachel started again, her tone saying that she had every intention of changing the subject to something a little more upbeat.

"What?"

"We need something to do."

"And what is it that you plan on doing?"

"I think the better question is who I plan on doing, my friend."

"Oh," Brooke grimaced. "It's a little early for that."

"Maybe for you," Rachel said with a grin and stood up before pulling Brooke up too, "but not for me. Let's get changed, check out the town, check out the guys, and then we can head to the beach early."

"Fine," Brooke gave in without much fight and handed back Rachel the mug of coffee before heading to her room to get ready.

* * *

This was probably Lucas' favorite place in the house. The balcony outside of his bedroom at Dan's beach house over looked the ocean and despite the screaming teenagers on the beach below him, he still felt peaceful up there.

Karen was spending a few weeks of much needed vacation with Keith in Charleston, and Dan and Deb were at a party at a country club outside out town, leaving the house to Lucas and Nathan. They were both too lazy to move everything around and open up the house for the Fourth of July party they were holding, but they opened up their private section of the beach to all of their friends. Mouth had hooked them up with some speakers to play music outside and the bonfire had just been lit a few minutes ago. It was 8:15 and the sun was just beginning to set. The fireworks would start in forty five minutes. "Dude, what are you doing up here?" Nathan asked as he stepped out onto the balcony behind Lucas.

"Just…" Lucas trailed off. "I just needed a minute to myself," he said while looking at the scene below him. Not far down the beach he could see Brooke standing with Rachel, Haley, and Peyton. They were all laughing at something and Lucas frowned slightly when he realized he couldn't see her smiling from his spot.

It had slowly been dawning on him that everyday what he wanted was to see Brooke, to make her smile, to take her problems away. He still couldn't figure out why. They didn't have history and he hadn't been there for her through the worst times of her life, but he felt connected to her. She made him happy, she made him smile, and that was more than any other girl had ever done for him.

It was more than a fling; he knew that for sure. Whether it would last past summer's end or not was still a question he had yet to answer. At the moment though? It didn't really matter. What mattered was that she seemed to be doing okay again. What mattered was that after their conversation the evening before she felt comfortable around him again.

"Luke?" Lucas tore his eyes away from Brooke and looked at Nathan beside him. It was obvious from Nathan's slightly annoyed expression that his brother had been trying to get his attention.

"What's up?"

"Are you coming back downstairs?" Nathan asked. He had come inside from the beach when he spotted Lucas standing alone upstairs. "Come on, Tim's up next for beer pong and I want to see him get his ass kicked."

"Yeah," Lucas laughed and agreed, shaking his previous thoughts from his head and followed Nathan downstairs.

* * *

"..I'm serious B, the guy is messed up, he's a legit addict," Rachel told Brooke with certainty.

"Sam? The same Sam who—"

"Yep."

"Wow, I knew he had some issues, but I didn't think it was_ that_ bad."

"Yeah, well here's the best part," Rachel continued and Brooke chuckled slightly at the redhead's excitement over this kid's misery. "You know how his family is like richer than god? Well they're holding back his trust fund that was supposed to kick in this year until he goes to rehab."

"Who's going to rehab?"

Brooke turned around to see Lucas and Nathan behind her.

"This guy we used to know," Brooke said. "It's all the juicy gossip I missed."

"He flunked out of our school, got a coke habit and disappeared. No one had heard from him in over six months. That is until last week when he showed up at his old friend Erik's party," Rachel explained.

"Oh," Lucas said with raised eyebrows.

"Oh!" Rachel started again. "I almost forgot! Sarah and Jordan finally hooked up."

"No way!'

"Okay then," Lucas cut in. "I'm starting to feel a little out of place."

Nathan looked down at his shorts. "Oh, good, I'm still a guy."

"Wanna go chug a few beers?" Lucas suggested.

"And then box or something?" Nathan added and Lucas eagerly agreed. "Race ya!" Nathan called out and turned to run away.

Before Lucas could fully turn around Brooke grabbed his arm and pulled him close to her.

"Where'ya going?" Brooke asked with pseudo innocence only she could perfect.

Lucas could feel her breath mix with his as he watched her gaze travel from his eyes down to his lips and then quickly back up.

"Nowhere," he whispered and quickly kissed her.

And suddenly nothing else mattered. After Brooke responded and deepened the kiss they felt as though they could have continued all night. Until someone cleared their throat next to them.

They broke apart to see Nathan and Haley standing there with smirks on their faces. Lucas smiled sheepishly while Brooke turned to look for Rachel who had disappeared. A quick scan of the beach showed that Rachel must have left as soon as they had stopped talking because she was already chatting up another lifeguard by the row of kegs that had been set up.

Brooke laughed and shook her head before turning back to Nathan and Haley.

"You guys want to sit somewhere?" Nathan asked. "Fireworks start in like a minute."

"Yeah, sure."

Brooke had had the same July fourth weekend for the past few years. She and practically all of her friends would be at Bevin's party in the Hamptons while her parents and most of her friend's parents would be at a different party down the beach.

This was different. This night proved the new beginning Brooke was creating for herself. She didn't feel like she needed to be surrounded by the people and things that she was used to. She didn't care what her friends were doing or what her social status was at the moment. All she cared about that night was that when she was in the arms of the guy she was pretty sure she was falling in love with, she was finally starting to feel like she could breathe again.

* * *

When Lucas woke up the next morning and wandered downstairs with a slight hangover and the need for some breakfast, not many of the things he saw surprised him. The proverbial red plastic cups still littered the beach in front of the house. Various items of clothing were left behind, leaving it to the imagination to figure out what kind of condition the owner was in without said item. Everything was quiet; the night before fireworks and music were booming along with the rowdiness of Tree Hill's teenage population, but in the morning, the only sounds Lucas could hear were the waves crashing rhythmically against the shore.

The one thing that did surprise him though, was that Brooke Davis was sitting on the steps of his back porch watching those waves.

The night before she and Rachel had left late to go back to Brooke's house. Rachel was leaving later that day so the girls had wanted to spend as much time together as possible. That's why it didn't make sense that Brooke was sitting alone on his back porch.

"Hey."

Startled, she turned around and when she realized it was him she let out a shaky breath of relief.

"Hey," she gave him a small smile.

"What's going on, are you alright?" Lucas asked worriedly as he sat down next to her.

"Yeah, at least I think so," Brooke said quietly.

"What's going on, Brooke?" Lucas tried again softly when he recognized the small orange bottle she was holding in her hands.

"I know that we've had more than our fair share of serious conversations lately, but do you think you're up for one more?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Okay," Brooke and nodded before looking down to the object in her hands. "It took me nearly an hour to get here today."

"What? Why?" Lucas asked, not knowing why a normally twenty minute drive would take so long.

"Because I turned back about six times," Brooke told him and paused to try to make sure she had the right words. "The other night you asked me why I kept these; why I kept something that has caused such problems for me."

"And?"

"I'm scared. Really scared. Even when I stopped taking them regularly, they were my safety net. I knew that I shouldn't keep them but I was scared to find out what would happen if I needed them and they weren't there."

"So what changed?"

Brooke turned to look at him. "Here," she handed him the bottle, effectively ignoring his question. He had told her straight out the other day that he didn't like the idea of her relying on anti-anxiety meds for when things got too tough. Like she said, they were her safety net, and up until that point, she had no reason to let go of that; nothing else to fall back on, not even Rachel could completely help her with this.

But after a sleepless night she knew that she had something else now. He proved to her that night, in that conversation, that she had him.

"Brooke…"

"Look, I know this is a really shitty explanation, and I know that it seems kinda out of the blue, but just take them. I'm done with them. You made me done with them. So I guess…," she trailed off. "Thank you."

Lucas nodded and took the bottle from her offering hand.

He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her close, kissing the side of her head gently.

He was proud of her.

And he was pretty sure he was in love with her.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!!  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	12. Let's Get Away for a Few Days

**Hey everyone!**

**Thanks for the great reviews last chapter! Sorry, no time for shoutouts now, but if I get some great reivews for this chapter there will definitely be some next AN.**

**If anyone has any suggestions for songs that would go really well with this fic, please let me know. I would love the musical inspiration for this story.**

**The song I used in part of this chapter is "Banana Pancakes" by Jack Johnson.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

She hated this feeling. It was one she had tried to combat for years.

Homesickness.

She hated being away from the familiar.

When she had first left New York for Tree Hill it had been to get away from everything she was used to. It was because she couldn't deal with everything at home.

While she had become close with Lucas' group from Tree Hill, they had their own lives that kept them busy. Lucas and Nathan had Dan's rigorous training schedule to follow for most of the day, Peyton was working at a record store, Jake was working at the café or hanging out with Peyton, and Haley was working at the café working on her music or hanging out with Nathan.

She found herself alone more often as time wore on, and she began to miss her real home. She swam laps when she got up every morning, she had finished the photo albums, visited the mall frequently, and she had even managed to read a few books. But after a month of life in Tree Hill, the born and bred city girl was finding less and less to do. She found her self bored more and more. When she was alone, she was left at the mercy of her thoughts, and that's what brought her to constantly think of what she missed.

She missed her friends; even the ones that annoyed her to no end. She missed the city. She missed finding new great restaurants or just getting lunch with Rachel at the Dean & Deluca in their neighborhood.

The thing she missed the most though, was something she would never get back. Whenever her parents left on trips or when out to social events and left her alone, Matt would call and check up on her. He had an innate sense of when she needed company the most. That was when the phone would ring. A simple "what's up?" or "how's school going?" was enough to let her forget for a few minutes that she was alone. Matt would never leave her completely alone.

But the phone has yet to ring this summer, and she knows it's not going to.

* * *

_Well can't you see that it's just raining?_

_There ain't no need to go outside._

"Brooke!?" Lucas calls out once he closes the front door behind him. A clap of thunder seems to shake the earth beneath them, but Lucas doesn't even flinch because it's the third huge one in less than a minute and he's expecting it. The mid-July heat makes for some pretty scary storms by the southern, near-coastal town.

He shakes his head as he hangs up his soaking rain coat in the front closet; he ran from the car in the driveway to the front door and he still ended up dripping.

"Brooke?!" He calls out again, louder this time.

"Luke?" He can hear her call back and he quickly makes his way upstairs to where her voice came from.

"Hey," he said softly and smiled when he got to the doorway. She was sitting in her bed, securely under the covers and clutching the remote as the weather channel's forecast glared from the TV.

"Hi," she said back, clearly relieved to see him. The previous weekend while at his mother's house, he had gotten a call from her late one night in the middle of a storm. She had explained that although she loved thunderstorms, she hated being alone during one.

"You okay?" Lucas asked as he laid down in bed next to her.

"Yeah, I'm okay now."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, it's just…really quiet here," Brooke said with a small shrug; she didn't want to explain everything else yet.

"Alright," Lucas says even though he's not totally convinced. He kisses her gently on the lips before collapsing back into the pillows to lay flat on the bed.

"Are _you_ okay?" Brooke asks, shifting her body so that she's looking down on him.

"Yeah," Lucas says before closing his eyes. "Just tired," he releases out a long breath. It's silent for a moment and Brooke watches as his calm face contorts in an unpleasant thought.

"Brooke?" He asks quietly.

"Yeah?" The response is just as low.

"Can you um…" He lifts his head off the pillows to look at the TV, "change the channel?"

Brooke let out a small laugh in surprise. "Sure," she says and he lets his head drop back down as she surfs the channels.

"Anything particular you want to watch?" It's just past four on a Tuesday afternoon so she really doesn't expect anything to be on.

"Not really." It was clear that he didn't have any interest in the TV. He rolled over slowly towards Brooke and into the fetal position, groaning slightly.

"Luke, you okay?" Brooke muted the TV and turned to him, concern evident on her face.

"Sore," Lucas mumbled into the pillow. "Tired and sore."

"Hey," Brooke ran the backs of her fingers across his cheek softly and he opened his eyes. "What's going on?"

"I don't know," Lucas shrugged slightly. "Dan said he met some interesting people a couple weeks ago at that Fourth of July party he went to, and since then it's like Nathan and I are living in a basketball boot camp. I'm just…worn out I guess."

"Wait, interesting people?" Brooke questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"I think it was some scout or Duke alum or something. Whatever it was it kicked him into high gear with training."

"Is he really being that tough?"

"Yep," Lucas rolled onto his back again. "I think he may actually have a few screws loose or something."

"Yikes," Brooke said. "Well if you're that tired why don't you just tell him you need a break or something?" She knows from Nathan all those summers ago that Dan doesn't just let you stop if you want to, but she still asks.

Lucas doesn't really talk about it, but Nathan has told her what Dan is like with both of them; the fleeting moments of some sort of fatherly love that he shows towards them are more than overshadowed by his constant need for control over everything in their lives.

Lucas shook his head. "It doesn't work like that."

"Why not?"

He didn't know the answer; at least he didn't have a real answer to give. He didn't know why he couldn't just stop. Any rational person would say just to tell your father how you feel. But it wasn't a rational situation. Dan isn't a rational person. And so he just _knows_ that it doesn't. Maybe he doesn't have any concrete evidence of this, but he's gone over the hypothetical confrontation in his head a few hundred times, and even when he controls the outcome – one that he could make so sugary sweet that it would be sickening – he knows that it will end badly. There will be threatening, maybe some blackmail, but definitely a hell of a lot of yelling, and he doesn't want to deal with that.

"Luke?"

His head jerks back to attention and it's not until he looks into Brooke's confused eyes that he realizes that he zoned out.

"It just doesn't," he answered again; no malice or annoyance – the tone that would surely make Brooke roll her eyes at him – just a lack of hope. It's that tone that evokes such an intense sympathy in her gaze that he has to lean up and kiss her softly.

"I know this sounds weird," he continues, "but I don't want to stop either."

Brooke tilts her head to the side and furrows her brow in confusion. "What? Some sort of weird masochistic thing?" She asks with a bit of a joking tone in hopes that she isn't right.

"No," Lucas assures with an amused chuckle. "I have this plan—"

"This sounds…dark."

"It's not."

"Good. I—"

"Can I finish?" Lucas says, desperately trying to keep a straight face at her childish interruptions. He's barely holding in the laugh when he sees her begin to say 'yes' but stops herself and just nods. "Whether I like it or not, whether I admit it most days or not, I need his…help," Lucas could barely stomach the thought. "Everyone, especially Nathan and I, hate to admit that Dan knows basketball. He knows the game, he knows how to train for it, he just good at it. So I'll let him train me. Push me to my limits and further than that because he's going to train me to be the best. That way I can get at least a partial scholarship to college. With the extra money my mom would be able to pay for the rest and if she can do that, then I'll be eighteen and have no more ties to Dan. His help is my escape."

Brooke slowly nodded, taking it all in.

"You're wrong," she finally says.

"Excuse me?" He's responds incredulously.

"That's a little dark," she tells him pointedly. He takes a moment to figure out what she is talking about, and when he gets it, he just laughs lightly and pulls her closer to him.

"Just a little bit," she tells him again.

"Whatever you say, Brooke. Whatever you say."

And after that they didn't need to say anything else.

_Lady lady love you_

_Cause I love to lay here lazy._

_We could close the curtains_

_Pretend like there's no world outside._

_We could pretend that all the time._

* * *

_Well the telephone's singing ringing it's too early don't pick it up._

_We don't need to we got everything we need right here_

_ and everything we need is enough._

_Just so easy when the whole world fits inside of your arms_

_Do we really need to pay attention to the alarm?_

_Wake up slow._

_Mhmm, wake up slow._

After their talk Lucas had quickly succumbed to a much needed nap. Brooke on the other hand couldn't sleep at first.

The house was still deafeningly quiet.

Only two sounds filled the room and the house. The first was the rain that steadily patted against the window for another hour; a sound that only proved to make everything more eerie. The second was the sound of Lucas' soft breathing as he slept.

It amazed her how comforting one person could be; that all of her worries that plagued her didn't seem to matter when he was around - even if he was just sleeping.

Lucas had been sleeping for just under two hours and Brooke just of half an hour when the unfortunate ringing of a phone woke them both.

"I think," Lucas grumbled as he searched for his phone with his eyes closed, "that I should throw my phone in the river."

"Why is that?"  
"Because it wakes me up, interrupts my conversations, and generally just pisses the hell out of me."

Brooke let out a low chuckle into the pillow. "You gonna answer it?"

"Nope. I'm turning it off."  
"Really?" Brooke questioned and finally opened her eyes.

"Yeah," Lucas said as he turned his phone off and put it on the beside table behind him.

"Can we stay like this forever?" Brooke asked quietly.

"Absolutely."

Silence enveloped them again and this time Brooke wasn't the only one who noticed how deafening it was.

It was no longer raining so even that noise had been eliminated.

They were facing each other, just inches apart, but Brooke had closed her eyes again.

As Lucas watched her he knew she wasn't at peace. By now he knew by looking at her when she was worried or concerned or just thinking deeply because she furrowed her brow slightly. Not even enough to be noticeable to anyone who wasn't looking.

But Lucas was looking. He was worried. It had been bothering him lately that she was spending so much time alone.

He couldn't worry about it for long though, because even though he had turned his phone off, Brooke's was on and now ringing.

"You have got to be kidding me," Brooke grumbled as she reached for it. "It's your brother."

"Tell him to leave us alone."

"How can I help you Nate?" Brooke answered the phone.

_"Is Luke there?"_

"Yesss, I'm assuming you want to talk to him."

_"Yes, I would. Thanks Brookie."_

Brooke handed the phone over to Lucas.

"What do you want, Nate?"

_"Dude, you need to get back here."_

"What are you talking about?"

_"It stopped raining so Dan wants us back out on the court."_

"Are you serious?" Lucas sat up in bed.

_"I wish I wasn't."_

"This is ridiculous! We spent four hours with him this morning!"

_"I know, I know, but he's leaving again tomorrow for god only knows what in Charlotte. He'll be gone for five days, man. Can we just please him for two more hours?"_

Lucas sighed. "I hate how you're so compliant with this."

_"Hey!" he didn't sound happy. "I hate this just as much as you, but the sooner we start this the sooner we get it over with."_

"Fine," Lucas rubbed his face with his free hand. "I'll be there in ten."

_"Thanks man. Oh and by the way I couldn't get in touch with you before. You must have turned your phone off by mistake or something."_

"Yeah, or something," Lucas muttered and rolled his eyes.

_ "What?"_

"Nothing, I see you soon."

_"Alright, see ya."_

Lucas hung up and fell backwards to the pillows.  
"So I guess your leaving again, huh?" Brooke was sitting up now and looking down on him with a disappointed expression.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Brooke forced a smile, not exactly excited at the idea of being alone again.

"I'll call you later, okay?"

Brooke nodded and Lucas kissed her softly before gathering his things and leaving, reluctantly turning his phone back on as he made his way down the stairs.

* * *

"Oh Brooke! Thank god you're here," Haley said as Brooke got out of her car.

"Yeah I got your message," Brooke said looking confused. "What's going on?"

"I don't really know," Haley said as she led Brooke into the large Scott house. "I got here like fifteen minutes ago to see Nathan and when I came in something was seriously off."

"What do you mean, 'off'?"

"Apparently because of the rain the court was really slippery and Lucas twisted his ankle pretty badly at the end of their practice. So Lucas got pissed and got into it with Dan, and then Nathan tried to break it up."

"Okay," Brooke nodded not really understanding what _really_ went down. "So what's going on now?"

"Nathan's in the kitchen getting something to eat, Dan's in his study, and Lucas locked himself in his room."

Brooke took a deep breath. "I guess that means you need my help with Lucas, huh?"

"Yeah, really badly. I haven't seen him this bothered by Dan in a while."

"Alright," Brooke nodded. "Thanks for calling me."

"Thanks for coming!" Haley was relieved that Brooke was there. Before Brooke came around there were only a few people that could get through to Lucas and so far two of the three hadn't been able to help him. Nathan and Haley considered calling Karen, but they knew that she hated being anywhere near Dan Scott's house, and even though they knew she'd be there in a heartbeat for her son, they didn't want to make her come over.

So Brooke headed up the stairs slowly, observing her surroundings. She had only been there a handful of times. Usually Lucas was at her house or they were at the beach, the rivercourt, or the café. Lucas tried to spend as little time in his father's home as possible.

"Lucas?" Brooke knocked on the door softly.

"Brooke?" his answer was muffled through the door.

"Yeah, it's me. Can I come in?" She had no idea what she was supposed to say to him, but after everything he helped her through she at least owed it to him to try.

She could hear his muffled movements a few moments before the door unlocked and opened for her.

He looked tired. Frustrated. Angry. Sad.

"Hey," his voice came dangerously close to cracking as he gave her a small smile.

She took in his appearance further. He was still wearing his work out clothes and his hair looked like he ran his hand through it a couple dozen times. But what stood out the most to Brooke was the fact that he was clearly leaning to one side. When she looked down she saw why. He had taken off his socks and it was clear that his left ankle was swollen; too swollen for him to be standing on without being in pain.

"Okay, you need to sit." Brooke quickly ushered him back towards the bed.

"Thanks," Lucas said quietly and watched as Brooke searched around his room before spotting the ice back on his desk. She grabbed it and brought it back over to him.

"Did you plan on using this?" Brooke asked as she held it out in front of him.

"Not really," Lucas admitted and looked back down at his ankle. It was starting to look like someone jammed a golf ball under his skin. As an athlete Lucas knew how stupid he was being with his physical health, but he was so angry that he didn't really care at the moment.

Brooke just rolled her eyes and pushed him back gently so that he was sitting up with his back against his headboard. She raised his leg onto one of the extra pillows and then carefully applied the ice, holding his leg steady when he flinched at the coldness.

"So are you going to tell me what's going on or do I have to beat it out of you?" Brooke asked seriously but with a hint of playfulness. She was still sitting on the opposite side of the bed so that she could make sure the ice didn't fall.

"I'm just…" He trailed off, not knowing how to put his thoughts into words. He looked to Brooke who was waiting patiently for his answer and he sighed. "To be honest I'm not sure I want to answer that."

"Why is that?"  
"Because I gave you that long speech earlier about my plan and how I would put up with Dan if it got me where I wanted."

"And now?"  
"Now I'm just really, really frustrated. I'm so sick of him and everything and…"

"It's okay," Brooke looked at him with a small reassuring smile. "It's okay to feel that way."

"I know it is," Lucas tried to convince himself. "It's just hard, you know? I mean, Dan may actually be loosing it, Nathan is telling me not to pick fights with Dan, and I'm just sick of it all! It's like a broken record with the three of us! It's the same fucking argument every time!"  
Brooke definitely didn't know what to say now, especially since Lucas starting yelling and cursing; Lucas was usually the mild mannered one of the two and Brooke was the one whose language could rival that of a sailor. Would 'sorry' be annoying to him? Did he want comfort or just someone to vent to?

She had never seen him angry like this before and while she had no idea what to do, it seemed like he did because after realizing his outburst, Lucas was calming down.

"I'm sorry," Lucas started guiltily. He didn't mean to start yelling, he was just so fed up.

"It's okay, I understand."

It wasn't okay, Lucas told himself, but Brooke seemed so sure of her words that all Lucas could do was nod.

"Hey, can I ask you something?"  
Brooke looked up from adjusting the ice pack on his ankle. "Yeah."

"Do you want to get a way for a few days?" He had been thinking about it for a little while now. Everyday as Dan and basketball weighed on him more and more, he really started to understand why Brooke had wanted so desperately to get away for the summer.

"Away?" Brooke asked, slowly drawing the word out. "You mean like the beach house away?" she asked, knowing that it wasn't what he meant but scared for the real answer.

"No," Lucas shook his head. "Look, my dad is leaving tomorrow for Charlotte for a few days, Peyton and Jake won't be back from Savannah until Tuesday, and Nathan and Haley are going to be at the beach house while Dan's gone," he explain and then a sense of urgency came through in his voice. "Let's get away."

"What do you mean, _away_?" Brooke asked again, the fear more evident in her voice this time.

Lucas hesitated for a beat, and then in a single moment decided to go for it.

"Let's go to New York."

Silence.

Brooke wasn't sure how long it had been since Lucas had asked the question, but she couldn't form any words. She could barely breathe. Suddenly she was confused; nothing made sense anymore and all she knew was that a thousand scenarios were running through her mind and none of them ended well.

"I…" she didn't know what to say, how to respond, what she wanted to do.

But then she looked down quickly after having felt a cold drop of water splash on her hand. The ice pack was beginning to drip on her and she breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm going to take this downstairs before it makes a mess," she told Lucas and was out of the room before he could respond.

She hurried downstairs, still not able to make sense of all her thoughts. She walked quickly into the kitchen where Nathan and Haley were sitting across from each other at the counter, holding hands across the granite surface.

"Hey," Haley happily and Brooke shook herself out of her daze.

"Hey," She tried to hide the emotion in her voice.

"Is Luke okay?" Nathan asked.

"Yeah, I think he'll be okay, he just needed to vent a little," Brooke told him.

"Do you mind if I go up and see him?" Haley asked.

"No, of course not," Brooke said pleasantly. She never wanted to be the kind of girlfriend that hogged the guy she was with; she had seen those relationships with some of her friends at school and none of them ended well.

"Thanks," Haley said and gave Nathan a quick kiss before heading upstairs.

Brooke went over to the sink and dumped the nearly completely melted iced out. She moved to throw the empty ziplock bag out but Nathan stopped her.

"You can just leave it on the counter," he told her, "my mom's going through some 'save the earth' phase so she's reusing everything and all that stuff." Usually Nathan would just roll his eyes at something like that – especially if it was his mother doing it – but he knew that life with Dan was getting worse for his mother too, and if her new hobbies and interests kept her from drinking her way through the day, then so be it.

"So how are things with Haley?" Brooke asked. As she and Lucas got closer and Nathan and Haley got closer the two couples saw less and less of each other.

"Good. Really good," Nathan said and Brooke figured he probably didn't realize the huge smile that graced his face with he spoke or even thought about her. "What about you and Luke?"

"Good. Really good," Brooke repeated sincerely but with a cheeky smile and Nathan laughed slightly.

"You okay, Brookie?" Nathan asked concerned when he saw the smile fall from her face far too quickly.

"Yeah," her voice sounded weak and Nathan was unconvinced. "Lucas asked me to go to New York with him for a few days," she admitted quickly.

"Really?" Nathan's eyes widened. "New York, as in your home?"

"Yep."

"Oh, well I wasn't expecting that," Nathan admitted. "Do you want to go?" he asked. He was fully aware of the fact that she wanted to be far away from her life for the summer, but it had been a while already and he thought that maybe she had changed her mind.

"I don't know," Brooke shrugged. She knew the risk – the risk of getting caught and the emotional risk of being back home. But she wanted to see her friends. She wanted to see Rachel, her dad, and everything else she missed.

"You sure you don't know?" Nathan asked after seeing her pensive expression.

"I know I want to go, but I don't know if it's the right thing to do."

"Well," Nathan said as he stood up. "There's only one way to find out," he told her pointedly before placing a hand on her shoulder comfortingly as he walked out of the kitchen and towards the living room.

Brooke considered his words for a second before turning and heading back upstairs.

Once se reached Lucas' door, she could hear Haley's raised voice behind it.

_"Are you crazy!" Haley nearly shouted. "Lucas do you know how selfish that was? You shouldn't make her go back before she's ready!"_

Brooke smiled softly at how Haley looked out for her. She still didn't know the girl that well, but Brooke knew that she was the kind of friend she would be lucky to have. But then her smile faded when she realized Haley could be right. Was she ready to go back and face some of the things that caused her to leave in the first place?

Silencing the doubt in her head, Brooke knocked on the door and when she heard Haley stop speaking, she opened it slowly.

"Hey," Brooke tried to smile as convincingly as she could.

"Hey," Lucas and Haley said at the same time.

"I'll go," Brooke cut straight to the point.

"Really?" The both said again, Haley in disbelief and Lucas in joy.

"Yeah," Brooke realized there was no turning back now. "But we go by my rules, okay? We go where I say we can, see who I say we can, and do nothing that I don't want to do," Brooke said sternly. She wasn't talking about dragging Lucas to go shopping, she was talking about avoiding anyplace where she could run into someone who could potentially tell her mother of her whereabouts.

"Okay," Lucas eagerly agreed.

"Okay," Brooke confirmed, wondering if she was in fact making the right decision. "Okay."

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!!  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	13. Welcome to New York

**Hey everyone!**

**I feel horrible for not updating sooner, but the least I can do is explain. I had planned to get a chapter up like tow and a half weeks ago right before I left for two weeks, but packing and stuff got in the way and I wasn't able to updated.**

**The good news I have is that this chapter has actually been cut down. I know that doesn't seem like good news but what I mean is that I cut it down so that I could get something posted tonight. In the next two days I should have rest of what I had planned to be this chapter posted. After that, you can expect updates to be a bit more frequent as I am trying to get to a good place with this story before school starts after Labor Day weekend.**

**Thanks for sticking with me through the long wait.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

When the plane ride started she was stressing so much that she nearly made herself sick. Towards the middle she relaxed and started planning out what she and Lucas would do for the three or four days they would be there.

But now, as the plane begins its decent into JFK, she feels almost numb. She can't figure out if it's a combination of so many emotions at once or rather her not knowing what to feel or what to expect that has brought this on.

She doesn't have much time to figure it out though, because before she knows it the plane has landed and pulled up to the gate. Everyone stands at once and tries to get the bags from the overhead compartment as quickly as possible. Unfortunately for her, Lucas – in his eagerness to be in New York City with Brooke, is one of those people.

Lucas follows Brooke's lead as they quickly make their way through the airport to get a cab. As he follows though, he can't help but notice how quiet Brooke has been since the beginning of the plane ride. Maybe Haley was right, he thinks, and suddenly the guilt is overwhelming.

The cab comes to a stop in front of a grey awning on Park Avenue and a uniformed doorman quickly comes to open the door for them and then takes their bags. Lucas steps out first as Brooke gets the change from the driver and when she does get out of the cab, the doorman is pleasantly surprised to see her.

"Miss Davis!" He greets warmly. "I was wondering when we were going to see you around here again."

"It's good to see you, Bruce," Brooke smiles and Lucas follows them into the elegantly decorated lobby.

"Miss Gatina just stepped out but she said to send you on up," he tells them as he places their bags in the elevator and hits the pent house button for them.

"Thanks Bruce," Brooke says before the door closes and Lucas is left slightly confused.

"Um, Brooke?" He starts almost shyly.

"We're staying at Rachel's," Brooke says, immediately knowing what he's going to ask and Lucas is sure he hears a bit of sadness in her voice, but as she continues speaking, it's gone as if it was never there. "I live just across the street but my parents are home and I don't want to see them. Rachel's parents are in Italy for a few weeks it's just…better if we stay here."

Lucas nods and he begins to feel sort of lost and helpless with everything going on around him.

When they enter the apartment Lucas is sort of awed by everything. Brooke said Rachel's family was wealthy, but Lucas realizes that she didn't do them justice in her explanation.

Brooke quickly leads him through the home and to the guest bedroom with such comfort that it seems like Brooke is in her own home. After setting their bags down, she leads him back through and into the kitchen where they find a note from Rachel.

_"Hey bitch, I went out to meet Vic. You know the new trainer, right? I'll be back around 2:30. Rach xo"_

Brooke sighs. Rachel had to get rid of her last personal trainer because she slept with him; she can only wonder how long this one will last before the same thing happens.

It's only 1:45, but Brooke already has plans. She turns around to talk to Lucas but he isn't there.

After a quick look around she spots him standing in front of the large windows in the living room that overlook Park Avenue.

"Luke?"

"Yeah?" He turns around and for a second his gets his hopes up that she'll be smiling and acting like the Brooke he loves.

He gets let down.

"Listen," she starts and speaks slowly to choose her words carefully, "I have uh, plans now. I have somewhere I need to be and I won't be back until two or two-fifteen."

"Plans?" Lucas asks skeptically. He doesn't like the sound of anything that's that ambiguous.

"Yeah," Brooke realizes how she must sound so she lightens her tone quickly. "I just have an appointment that I need to go to. You can do whatever you like while I'm there. I suggest a museum because I know you want to go, but don't expect me to take you. This is your chance."

"What do you mean an appointment?" Lucas asks, completely ignoring her attempt at a joke to deflect the attention away from her.

"I mean I have an appointment that starts soon so I need to go. I have my cell and I'll call you as soon as I get out, okay?" She asks but doesn't wait for an answer as she turns and grabs her purse and makes her way to the door. Before she can get out of his sight though she stops and turns around in guilt, "Look, I'm sorry that I have to ditch you like this as soon as we get here, but this is something I need to do."

"Okay," is all Lucas can say and he can only hope that this point that he didn't look like a lost puppy as she left.

* * *

It looked the same. It had been six weeks since she had last been there, but it still looked the same. Same wallpaper, same paintings and framed posters, same books on the book case. The only change in the room were the new magazines displayed on the tables in the waiting room that was arranged the same way it had been before she had left.

She wasn't entirely sure why she expected something to look different. Maybe it was because something _felt_ different. She didn't feel like she _had _to be there anymore. It wasn't forced.

This time she was there because she wanted to talk to someone about everything. Brooke knew Rachel would always be there for her to talk to, but she wasn't always the most compliant listener when it came to relationship feelings.

"Brooke?"  
Brooke snapped her head up and saw Dr. Rebecca Sands standing in the newly opened doorway.

"Hi."

"You can come in now," the older brunette smiled warmly. Brooke nodded and stood, mentally bracing herself before following.

"I have to say, Brooke, I was surprised to hear from you now. I thought you wouldn't be back for another month." Dr. Sands said.

"Well I wasn't expecting to be back here quite so soon either," Brooke admitted.

"And you were able to get time away from your summer courses to be here?"

Brooke tensed. Dr. Sands didn't know about her going AWOL and skipping out on the courses for college credit she was supposed to be taking that summer.

"Oh, right," Brooke gave a tight smile. "About that…" she trailed off.

"Is everything going alright with them?"

"Well, not really considering I never went."

"You never went?"

"No," Brooke shook her head seriously and a smile began to spread across her face when she thought of how she'd spent the first part of her summer. "Actually I got in my car and drove to my old summer home on the coast of North Carolina…and I've been there ever since." Brooke could see Dr. Sands' eyes widen in surprise.

"Really? Your parents were okay with this?"

"Well they didn't know," Brooke said. "My dad figured it out a few weeks later, but we came to an agreement that my mom didn't need to know," Brooke's tone said she was dead set in her words and she didn't want to continue.

"And what have you been doing there?"

"Just relaxing mostly. I've been trying…trying to get away from everything, you know what I mean? It's like I left New York, and when I got to Tree Hill, it was like I could suddenly breathe again."

"And you've been there alone this whole time?"

"No! Well, sort of," Brooke admitted. "What I mean is that I've been living alone, but I'm not alone. I met up with some old friends, and…and there's this guy Lucas who I met through them, and…" Brooke shrugged.

Dr. Sands listened intently; her curiosity peaked at Brooke's mentioning of Lucas because Brooke rarely, if ever, discussed the guys in her life during their sessions.

"You have a relationship of some sort with Lucas?"

Brooke let out a small laugh, smiling widely as she concentrated on a spot on the carpet. "Yeah, you could say that."

"Is it serious?"  
"Well I think you could say that," Brooke looked back up. "Somewhere between afternoons laying out in the backyard and nights where I poured my heart out to him…I fell in love."

"Fell in love?" While her carefully trained tone didn't say skepticism, Brooke knew it was there. How could someone not doubt her words? She was seventeen and in a summer romance.

"Yeah," Brooke couldn't stop smiling. "I know how crazy this is. I know that. I mean, he wasn't even a part of my life the last time we saw each other and now…now I can't imagine—I don't want to imagine what my life is going to be like without him."  
Dr. Sands nodded and wrote something down in the notebook she kept in her lap.

"Brooke I'm interested in something you said there," she said and Brooke fought not to let out a sigh. "Have you been thinking about the end of the summer much? What happens when you come back here?"

"Unfortunately, yes," Brooke admitted. In their sessions they had continuously discussed her inability not to worry about the future. She rarely admitted it past the room she was in now, but the upcoming year scared her for so many reasons. More than anything, she was scared that it would be as painful as the previous year. Now, on top of that, she had to add on thinking about what life would be like without Lucas – not something that seemed too great at the moment.

"Do you _want_ to come back here?" She asked carefully.

Silence.

Brooke kept her eyes trained on that spot on the carpet. "I don't know," she finally croaked out. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Part of me wants to stay in Tree Hill with Lucas and not have to come back here and deal with everything again, but the other part…the other part knows that this is my home and Tree Hill isn't no matter how much I want it to be."

"Have you told Lucas this yet?"

"Yeah, we talked about it a little, but I don't really like to talk about it that much."

"Does he want to talk about it more?"  
"Sometimes, but…I don't know. I don't know what I'm trying to say anymore."

"Well then let's focus on something a little different," Dr. Sands started. "In the past we've talked about your need for independence, has that changed at all since you've been away?"

Brooke paused, focusing once again on that spot for a moment before looking up with slight happiness in her eyes and a chuckle escaping her lips. "Yeah, it has. In so many different ways."

"What ways?"

"In the simplest of ways? I've learned to live on my own. Before I left, I was so independent, but at the same time I had a housekeeper to do my laundry and someone to make sure I had dinner every night. Now I actually know how to support myself. At the same time…I'm not so afraid to ask for help anymore. Maybe it's just Lucas and this group of people, but I _want _to open up more now and I haven't felt that way in years."

"That's good, Brooke," Dr. Sands smiled warmly. "That's really good."

"Yeah," the uncontrollable smile found its way back. "It is."

And so they continued, talking more about her motivations to leave and what she wanted to happen when she came back home.

As the minutes ticked by Brooke felt something different as she spoke. She didn't feel vulnerable in that chair anymore. She felt empowered. Like everything she was talking about didn't show her weakness but rather her strength to get through it.

With fifteen minutes left in the session Brooke texted Lucas with the address of where she was, asking him to meet her there at the end.

Lucas, not knowing what to do with himself in the new city, followed Brooke's advice and headed to the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Fifteen minutes after arriving, he left. Another five minutes later, he found himself at the Guggenheim three blocks up Fifth Avenue. Ten minutes after arriving, he was bored and relieved to receive a text message from Brooke, so he left and started walking towards the address he was given.

Lucas was a little confused on his way over to meet Brooke. Not only was he experiencing a total culture shock as a kid who had barely left his small home town, but he didn't know exactly what to think of Brooke's actions.

On one hand he was a little resentful; they were in her hometown and she had ditched him in less than five minutes. He was the one that needed this time away and after all he did for her over the past month, she wasn't there for him.

At the same time though, he felt guilty. He couldn't shake the thought that Haley was right and he had forced her to come back before she was ready. Maybe her absence was the beginning of something much more disastrous that he had caused.

"Lucas!" He snapped his head up and saw Brooke waiting underneath an awning with a smile on her face

"Hey," he gave her a small smile and a quick kiss which Brooke deepened immediately, confusing Lucas as to her change in attitude..

"Listen Luke, I'm sorry that I—"

"Brooke!" They both turned to see someone approaching them from inside the building.

"Dr. Sands?" Brooke asked.

"You left this inside, it must have fallen out of your bag," she said kindly and handed Brooke back her cell phone.

"Thank you so much!" Brooke gushed, realizing she probably would have had a nervous breakdown if she lost her phone. "Oh! Dr. Sands, this is Lucas Scott, Lucas, this is Dr. Sands."

"Lucas, its very nice to meet you," she smiled kindly, happy to meet the famous Lucas Scott after nearly forty five minutes of hearing about how he had helped Brooke so much.

"Nice to meet you too," he smiled and shook her hand.

"Well then," she turned back to Brooke. "Good luck with the rest of the summer and I'll see you a few days after you get back. Remember, if you ever need anything, you can call me and we can have a quick session over the phone."

"Thank you," Brooke said sincerely.

"That's what I'm here for, Brooke," she smiled and waved before entering the building again.

"Who was that?" Lucas asked.

"That was…my therapist," Brooke admitted slowly. She hated having to admit that at seventeen she was already having weekly appointments with a shrink.

"Oh," Lucas raised his eyebrows. Suddenly it all made sense.

"Anyway, as I was saying, I'm really sorry about earlier. You think we can start over?"  
"I think we can," Lucas said and intertwined his fingers through hers as they walked down the street.

"So, as your host in New York, for the next hour and a half that we have free, I will do whatever you want with you," Brooke stated surely, confident to be back in her hometown as long as she had Lucas by her side.

"How about we just walk around?" Lucas suggested. "We can go to the park or you can show me some of your favorite places around here?"

"That sounds perfect," Brooke smiled.

* * *

"So who's that?" Lucas asked as he tightened his arms around Brooke's waist as she sat in his lap.

After they had gotten back to Rachel's house the redhead had immediately ushered them back out the door and to the car. They were going to the Hamptons for their friend Bevin's birthday party.

"Which guy?" Brooke asked as she scanned the crowd through the living room.

"The one with the _really_ bad sock tan."

"Oh!" Brooke said and laughed slightly, she had noticed when she first saw him that night. "That's Devin. The tan lines are from playing tennis like eight hours a day. He's the best under eighteen on the east coast."

"Oh," Lucas took a sip from his beer.

"Yeah, his house is down the road, the one next to the Hiltons'"

"The Hiltons?" Lucas asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yeah," Brooke answered as if it was no big deal. "Acutally, the guy he's talking to, Josh, his family rents the Hilton house."

Lucas had to laugh. It was definitely a change from Tree Hill. He had thought that they partied hard back home, but it was more of everything where Brooke was from. More money. More people. More booze. More sex. More _everything_.

"So you miss all this?" Lucas asked.

Brooke looked around, contemplating it for a moment. She had expected to be happier to see everyone. While it was nice to get the "oh my god! you're back's" and "I missed you's", she found herself bored. None of this really appealed to her anymore. She had no reason to get drunk. She had Lucas and therefore no plans to hook up with a new guy. She had no interest in being there anymore.

"Not really," she admitted quietly, almost afraid to. If she admitted that, then it would be that much harder to leave Tree Hill at the end of the summer.

Before Lucas could come up with a response for her, he felt her tense in his arms.

"Brooke, you alright?"  
"Yeah," Brooke answered even though it was clearly a lie. She was still looking at Devon and Josh when a third guy approached them.

"Brooke, what's going on?" Lucas tried again.

"Nothing, I'm fine," Brooke smiled. Her tone said she was telling the truth but her eyes were lying.

"Brooke!" Brooke cringed slightly and turned her head to see Bevin happily approaching them. Before she found Bevin, her eyes met with him across the room. So much for keeping herself on the down low at the party.

"What's up Bev?" Brooke voice once again betrayed her. Excitement covered annoyance.

"You need to come with me, the girls are in the other room and we all totally need to have a minute together."

"Alright, I'm coming," Brooke smiled, not wanting to disappoint the birthday girl. She leaned back into Lucas for a moment and whispered in his ear. "Sorry about this, I'll be back in a minute."

"Okay," Lucas smiled and gave her a quick kiss before releasing her, figuring he should go get another drink to make himself busy while she was gone.

"Bev, question," Brooke said as she followed Bevin through the house.

"Yeah?"

"When did Adam get here?" Brooke asked. Seeing her ex boyfriend at a party with her current boyfriend could never turn out well. Add in the messy way Brooke and Adam broke up and his "annoying persistence and horniness" as Brooke always referred too, only made things worse.

"He got here like a half hour ago. He was out back with the girls doing shots," Bevin replied and then suddenly a light bulb went off in her head. "Oh my god! You're here with Lucas! _Awkward!!"_ she sang.

Brooke smiled tightly. "I think I can handle it."

After an impossibly long five minutes of bullshitting to all of her friends bout what she had been doing lately, Brooke finally made her way back to the living room to find Lucas.

What she saw when she found him though was exactly what she had been hoping to avoid. They were standing barely a few feet away from each other with their shoulders squared. It was clear that Adam was on the offensive and Lucas was just trying to keep composed in the unfamiliar environment.

"She has you wrapped around her finger, doesn't she?" Adam spat with a sly grin. Brooke was standing behind him and she could still tell that he was drunk. Clearly he had a few too many shots with the girls out back. "Come on, think about it. She disappears for half the summer and then shows up with some hick from whatever town she hid in. Feeling a little out of place here, aren't you?"

Brooke couldn't watch anymore. Lucas wasn't at all affected by Adam's jealous and drunken rants, but he didn't seem to know how to react. He was surrounded by people that wouldn't defend him and facing a guy that was clearly looking for a fight that Lucas didn't want to take part in.

"That's enough Adam," Brooke stepped forward and between the two, pressing a firm hand against Adam's chest to try to get him to back down.

"Hey! Look who it is," Adam glared through his inebriation. "Tell me, Brooke, what is it about this guy that is so fucking great?"

"Well for one, he doesn't act like this," her tone was calm but her words were venomous. Adam scoffed and Brooke shook her head trying to stay calm. "You're drunk and I'm not having this conversation with you." She wanted to tell him to get over it, to fuck himself, anything with more hate, but it wasn't worth it anymore. She had Lucas now and she really didn't care what Adam wanted from her anymore.

"Come on, Luke," Brooke said softly and turned to walk away with him.

"You know what?" Brooke kept walking, ignoring Adam who was still yelling. "Go ahead and leave with him, at least someone's finally gotten you to spread your legs again."

Brooke didn't even have time to react. In a split second Lucas was two steps behind her and Adam was flat on the floor.

All it took was one comment; one single right hook and Adam was floating in and out of consciousness on the floor.

The next thing Brooke saw was two of Adam's closest followers heading for Lucas. Finally, she sprung into action, grabbing Lucas' arm and pulling him away and out of the house before anyone could get to him.

They were walking now, just walking down the street and away from the party. They could hear the noise in the background, but they were otherwise quiet. Brooke was trying to process what had just happened and Lucas, knowing he screwed up, was afraid to say anything to her.

But then Brooke stopped walking, and for a moment Lucas hoped that she would say something to him. Yell at him or hit him or anything other than silence. But she didn't say anything yet. Instead she slipped off her shoes and held them in one hand as she just stood there looking down the road.

"Why did you do that, Lucas?" Lucas strained to hear her mumbled voice.

"I'm sorry, Brooke."

"I didn't ask if you were sorry," her voice had more bite to it. "I know you're sorry. I asked _why_ you did it."

"Nobody should ever talk about you like that."

"Luke, he was a drunk high school boy, it's not that big of a deal," she wasn't sure if she even believed her own words. "He was just being stupid. You're actions on the other hand, they can have serious repercussions."

"I don't care."

Brooke sighed. "Yes you do Lucas, just let the adrenaline rush fade off and then you'll realize how dumb that was. You'll start to feel the throbbing in your hand and you'll know."  
"I really don't care, Brooke."

"Yes you do!"

Lucas sighed this time, frustrated with her stubbornness.

"You're right, I do," Lucas countered and Brooke looked at him curiously. "I do care. So you want to know why I did it? I did it because I needed to stand up for you whether you wanted me to or not I did it because I _love_ you, Brooke."

Brooke stood still, looking up at him with her mouth slightly open. Definitely not the answer she was expecting.

"Look, I know I'm probably freaking you out or whatever, but I do. I really do," Lucas' voice softened.

Brooke stood stock still, a million and mostly irrelevant thoughts running through her mind.

_Did he really just say that? What do I say? What's going on at the party? How long have I been silent?_

There were too many thoughts and not enough of them were making sense.

Lucas let out a defeated breath. "Nevermind. Let's just keep walking. Not that I know where we're going," Lucas muttered and began to leave, but Brooke caught his hand. She intertwined her fingers with his and pulled him back to her.

"I love you too Lucas," she whispered with a smile.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Brooke nodded, her smile widening as she pulled him down for a kiss.

When they broke away she had a different glint in her eyes. "Come on," Brooke said as she slipped off her heels and began walking again.

"Where are we going?"

"Rachel's house is a few streets away."

* * *

They had barely made it into the guest room before Brooke tore Lucas' shirt off. Rachel's parents were still overseas so Brooke quickly found the spare key and let them into the house.

His hot lips were burning hot lips were burning her neck and everything seemed to be blurry. Actions were frantic and rushed yet somehow gentle. The sounds only came from them. Ragged breath. Unzippering of pants. Moans of moans of ecstasy.

And then the door swung open and hit the wall with a bang.

Lucas jumped up and off Brooke nearly falling off the bed in the process; his heart pounding from surprise.

"What the hell were you thinking back there?" Rachel yelled.

"Oh thank god," Brooke let out a breath and let her head fall back onto the pillows. For a moment she thought it was Rachel's parents. She could handle Rachel angry. The Gatinas? No so much.

"You stupid little shit!" Rachel went on. "Do you know how big of an asshole you are?!"

"Yeah, I do," Lucas deadpanned.

"Rach, leave him alone," Brooke propped herself up on her elbows to look at her best friend, totally unabashed at her appearance while Lucas was squirming in his boxers.

"Leave him alone?" Rachel asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, I already yelled enough for the both of us. He gets it."

Rachel stood her ground, glaring at Lucas. "Fine," she finally gritted out and turned to leave. "Oh, and Lucas?"

"Yeah?"

"You should know by now that Brooke likes it on top."

And with that she was gone, leaving the two in the bedroom alone once again.

"Thanks," Lucas said as he sat back down.

"For what?"

"Not letting Rachel kick my ass," Lucas said and then looked around before leaning closer to Brooke and lowering his voice, "she kinda scares me."

Brooke threw her head back and laughed loudly. "Aw, that's okay, she kinda scares a lot of guys."

Lucas chuckled too this time and swung a leg over Brooke's waist, causing her to lie back down again. He leaned in and captured his lips with his.

"Wait," Brooke pulled back, "are you _sure_ your hand's okay?"

"Yes," Lucas felt his insides twist at even the smallest lie. The truth was that it was beyond throbbing and the aspirin he was aching to take was just out of reach, but he knew that nothing was broken and he'd be fine by the time he got back home, so to ease her worries he spared the details.

"Really?"

"Yes," Lucas repeated. "Now I have a question for you."

"What?"

"Do you really like it better on top?" His innocence almost made her laugh as he hovered over her, but instead she grinned with a lustful gleam in her eye and quickly flipped them over before reclaiming Lucas' lips with her own.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!!  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	14. A Day for Talks

**Hey everyone!**

**I feel like a broken record because every chapter I start with an author's note saying how sorry I am for not updating sooner. I know this chapter was supposed to be posted a while ago, but I had a lot more trouble with it than I thought I would. My hope is to get the next chapter posted in a week or less, but I'm not promising anything like that that EVER again. This is just a hope.**

**Anyway, this wraps up the time in New York. Things are definitely going to be different when they get back to Tree Hill after this chapter.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed or PM-ed me to speed up!!**

**I didn't check for spelling errors or anything like that, so sorry if there are some mistakes in this chapter, but I wanted to post it as soon as I could.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

She was floating reluctantly in that stage between sleep and awake. She could hear sounds around her but her eyes were still sealed shut by the potential last few moments of sleep. The memories from the previous night came rushing back to her; some good, some bad, but all were certainly more than memorable.

The thoughts of the party alone were enough to make Brooke want to close her eyes and sleep forever, but it was Lucas' words afterward that pushed her to open her eyes and wake up, knowing that this action would get her closer to spending the day with him.

The blur of the unfamiliar sights of Rachel's guest room made her close her eyes tightly before reopening them to see the room clearly. The clock on the nightstand told her it was just after ten thirty in the morning and she sighed gratefully that the clock was there to tell her the time. While her legs were awake and now restless, everything chest up was still basically sleeping and she didn't have the energy to reach an arm out for her cell phone, although she was sure she had a dozen messages asking about what the hell happened the night before.

"Brooke?" Lucas asked softly from behind her.

Slowly but happily Brooke managed to muster the energy to turn around and see Lucas' deep blue eyes and soft smile as he propped himself up on one arm.

"Hi," Lucas could see her lips move but the sound was barely audible with her early morning rasp.

"Morning," Lucas' smile widened.

Brooke just gave him a closed smile before stretching her arms high up above her head.

"Morning," she breathed out as she released her stretch. "How long have you been up?" She turned back away from him into her previous position.

Lucas wrapped an arm around her and pulled her back close to him. "Not long at all. Did I wake you?"

"No," Brooke said softly and inched back closer to him. With thoughts of the previous night running through her mind, Brooke carefully brushed her fingers over Lucas' bruised knuckles.

"Does it hurt?"

"Not really."

"Will you be okay for when we get back?" Brooke asked, worry evident in her voice.

"Yeah," Lucas replied soothingly to help ease her mind.

"You need to stop injuring yourself," Brooke's comment was serious but her voice held some playfulness to it, "first your ankle, now this. What am I going to do with you?"

"Well, hopefully you'll lock me away in the bedroom and never let me out of your sight." The joke didn't do his true feeling justice. The ones that made his heart swell with love when he held her that close; still warm from sleep and snuggled under the covers, wanting nothing more than to be in his arms.

Brooke let out a throaty chuckle. "That would be nice," she admitted, "but totally unpractical," she added as she rolled over and smiled at him.

Lucas shrugged. "Hey, I guy can dream, right?"

"I would—" Brooke stopped speaking when muffled laughing from downstairs interrupted her. "Who's here?"

"Uh, I'd assume Rachel, you know, since this is her house," Lucas told her, trying to keep a straight face. "This _is_ her house, right? Broooke?"

Once again she let out a small laugh. "Relax Broody, it's her house. I was talking about the distinct _male_ laugh I can hear."

"Oh," Lucas hadn't even thought about it. "I don't know. Maybe someone she took home from the party?"

"No," Brooke furrowed her brow and shook her head slightly. "They never last through the morning."

"Oh," Lucas raised his eyebrows. "Then who is it?"

"I have no idea, let's go see," Brooke said but didn't move.

"Brooke?"

"Yeah?"

"You know you have to move to go see who it is, right?"

"Yeah, and I want to know, but I don't really want to move from this spot."

Lucas let out a deep chuckle. "Come on," he sat up and pulled her up too, despite her protests.

Brooke stumbled into the bathroom with an amused Lucas following her. She was hardly paying attention as she splashed water on her face and brushed her teeth before slipping on Lucas' sweatshirt over her barely there pajamas. In the July heat Rachel always kept the air conditioners on making it freezing in the house.

Brooke lazily led Lucas down the stairs, eyes half closed and wishing that she could stay in bed all day.

"Brooke?" Lucas asked quietly but was quickly silenced. She had stopped walking for a moment, seemed to wake up and then continued to walk down the stairs, this time at a faster pace.

Brooke recognized the voice as they got closer. She hadn't heard it in a while and she was sure her mind was play tricks on her, but she as almost positive it was him.

"Oh my god," Brooke finally reached the doorway. She was in her guess of who it was, but it didn't stop the complete shock that was evident in her voice. "Tommy?" Rachel and the tall brunette turned towards Brooke and Lucas at the interruption.

"Well look who finally decided to grace us with their presence," Rachel started smugly, clearly still not too pleased with the previous night's events. "Tell me, am I going to have to burn the sheets from the guest room?"  
Brooke rolled her eyes dramatically. "Tell me," she mimicked, "do you have like a quota of innuendos that you have to fill everyday or do you just take pleasure in asking these questions?" Brooke didn't give Rachel time to answer thought as she quickly made her way over to Tommy.

Lucas stood in the doorway and watched with confusion as his girlfriend launched herself into the arms of another guy, hugging him tightly.

"What are you doing here?" She questioned as she pulled back.

Tommy grinned. "Well my mom was going out of her mind with my father being…well being my father so she asked me if I wanted to get away for a few weeks and come back here. Of course I couldn't refuse."

"Um…?" Lucas cleared his throat behind them and instantly everyone else's eyes were on him.

"Oh! Sorry," Brooke exclaimed, realizing that Lucas' presence had nearly been forgotten. "Lucas this is Tom, he's an old friend of ours that moved to LA two years ago. Tom, this is—"

"Lucas Scott," a smile spread across Tom's face and he made his way over to Lucas with an eager outstretched hand. "I'm a big fan of yours."

Lucas shook his hand but the confusion was still evident in his features. "I'm sorry…?"

"You're officially a legend in my book. It's about time someone put Adam Rostly in his place," he elaborated. "I mean, come on, the guy's had it coming to him for years, but what you did last night was incredible! One punch and the guy has a broken cheekbone."

Lucas eyes widened in shock. He couldn't have done that much damage, could he?

"Well," Tom gave in a little, "it's technically a hairline fracture, but it's all the same to me."

"Oh shit," Lucas muttered and leaned back against the wall for support.

"Tom?" Brooke asked quietly and worriedly as she made her way over to them. She pulled Tom a few feet away from Lucas for a moment and looked at him seriously. "He's not, uh, pressing charges or anything, right?" She asked hesitantly. She didn't know what to expect from Adam anymore. Every time she had any sort of contact with him in the last few months she found more and more how big of a jackass he was, and found it harder to believe that she saw something even remotely good enough in him to date him.

"God no," Tom scoffed. "He was wasted and knows it was his fault, not to mention that oddly enough he has a conscious and feels pretty bad about the way he acted. I still want to kick the crap out of him, but I guess I'll just have to settle for letting him drown in his own guilt."

Brooke rolled her eyes at him but sighed in relief anyway. She glanced over at Lucas for a moment and realized he was still leaning against the wall, examining his hand. Tentatively, she walked over and took his sore hand in hers. She gentle ran her fingers over the tender areas, noting that in the much lighter kitchen she could see that his knuckles and wrist were swollen and already bruised.

"Hey Rach?" Brooke called behind her without taking her eyes off Lucas' hand. "Can you get some ice and some Aspirin for him?"

"I'll get it," Tom cut in before Rachel could refuse, and with a much more serious demeanor quickly fetched what was necessary.

"You okay?" Brooke asked looking up at Lucas' scared blue eyes.

"Yeah," his voice cracked slightly and Brooke could instantly tell that all the reasons for her yelling at him the night before were finally dawning on him.

Tom returned and silently handed the ice to Brooke and the Aspirin and water to Lucas who mumbled thanks and quickly downed them.

"Look," Tom started quietly, "I hate to do this now, but can I steal Brooke away for a few minutes?"  
"Uh yeah," Lucas said and placed a chaste kiss on Brooke's lips. "Go. I'll be fine."

Brooke was slightly startled by Lucas' quick change in emotion, but barely had time to think about it before Tom was leading her away.

When they had left the room, Lucas let himself fall into one of the chairs at the kitchen table.

"So…" he started, not really knowing how to talk to Rachel.

Rachel just rolled her eyes and went back to cutting fruit for her morning meal.

Lucas sat uncomfortably in the silence staring at the bad of ice on his hand, trying not to make any noise.

"Hey Rachel?" he finally broke the silence and Rachel looked up at him. "Did Brooke and Tom ever…you know? Cause they seemed pretty close, and I don't know…"

Rachel grinned. "That only took nineteen seconds, Scott. I'm impressed. I thought you'd crack in the first ten."

Lucas sighed over dramatically. "Can you please just tell me?"

Rachel rolled her eyes as she continued to cut the fruit. "One time. It was homecoming freshman year and they were both wasted. According to both it was the worst and most awkward hook up they have ever experienced. They've always just been really good friends, so I think you're safe there."

"Oh…thanks."

"Whatever, just don't bring it up with Brooke, they don't like to talk about it," Rachel told him. "Then again, she seems to love _everything_ you do, even the completely stupid things like last night. Last. Fucking. Night," she muttered, still annoyed. Lucas figured it was because he had caused an unfortunate scene, not because every moment Rachel saw Brooke and Lucas together she felt her best friend slipping away. Rachel had been there for Brooke through everything, but the more Brooke and Lucas' relationship deepened, the less Brooke needed her, and that scared the hell out of the redhead.

-

"So…" Brooke said and clasped her hands together as she and Tom walked through Rachel's backyard and sat down on one of the lounge chairs by the pool. "When did you get here?"

"Here like New York? Or here like Rachel's?"

"Both."

"I got to New York last weekend, so ill be here for another ten or so days before I leave, and I actually stayed here last night. Rachel was pissed off and drunk last night so I drove her home and stayed here so I could check in on you this morning."

Brooke smiled softly and whispered thanks. Her smiled faltered though as small connections were made in her mind.

Tom was able to drive Rachel home from the party because he still wasn't drinking, and the reason for his sobriety had a lot to do with why he hated Adam so much.

Sometimes that night in freshman year seemed so hazy, but other times the details were clear. The night of Springfest that year everyone had been partying hard. A little too hard in her and her friends' cases. Back then Tom and Adam were really good friends and they had both been pre-partying a little too hard together. Going shot for shot together, they were equally drunk until Adam left to make out with some girl and Tom kept drinking with the rest of the people in the house. By the time they had all made it to the actual party in the rented loft downtown, Tom was so intoxicated that he was floating in and out of consciousness.

Tom, Adam, and Brooke were the last three to arrive by cab so the rest of their friends were already inside. Brooke was just barely sober enough to comprehend what was going on and had begged Adam to help her take Tom to get help. But Adam was drunk and not really paying attention so he blew them off and went inside the party, leaving a quickly sobering and panicking Brooke with a passed out Tom on the sidewalk.

Brooke did the only thing she knew to do. With all her friends already inside Brooke called Matt and even though he was still away at college, he called one of his close friends who was in the city to go pick them up and take Tom to the emergency room.

By the time they got in the cab Tom had thrown up most of the alcohol left in his stomach so he didn't need to get his stomach pumped, but they learned in the hospital that at his blood alcohol level, Tom had literally drunken himself half to death.

That night had scarred Tom and since he and his family moved that summer right after school ended, he and Adam had never gotten past that night. Brooke on the other hand, had blocked out the memory and rarely thought about it anymore.

"I'm sorry, Tommy," Brooke finally whispered, shaking herself out of her thoughts and unpleasant trip down memory lane.

"For what?"

"For getting involved with Adam."

Tom sighed and nodded. "Why did you?"

"I don't know," Brooke shrugged half heartedly. "I was bored and lonely…and…"

"You know, I didn't think it could get worse than you're benefiting with Felix sophomore year, but clearly I was wrong."

Brooke sucked in a sharp breath. That was another part of her life she had tried to block out since she had started her relationship with Lucas. Lucas gave her more and made her happier than any other guy in her life had. He made her want to forget the person she once was even though that's who she had longed to become again when she had first arrived in Tree Hill.

"Sorry," this time it was Tom apologizing. "Let's just forget it, okay? I mean, you're totally done with Adam, right?"

"Right." Brooke nodded strongly.

"Good. Then it's forgotten." Tom knew that Brooke now could see the proverbial light when it came to Adam Rostly, and he didn't need to put his friend through more grief by holding it against her. "So…" it was his turn to leave the conversation hanging this time.

"We haven't talked in a while," Brooke said regretfully.

"Yeah, it's been too long. I should have checked in more."

"It's okay," Brooke reassured him. "You know I never did thank you for coming in for uh…for the funeral."

"I wanted to be there for you. Besides, you know how much I looked up to Matt."

"Yeah," Brooke agreed sadly.

"So how are you doing?" he asked. Rachel had filled him in earlier that morning on how Brooke had coped in the weeks and months afterward, but she didn't tell him much about what had been going on that summer.

"I'm okay," Brooke said hesitantly. "I'm learning to live with all, you know?"  
Tom nodded understandingly.

"I know you're concerned, and I love you for that, but I really don't want to rehash those painful months."

"Okay," he said quietly but then perked up. "You gonna tell me about Lucas?"

Brooke smiled widely. "You sure you want to hear this? It's more girl talk than Tommy-talk."

"That's okay," he told her, "I mean, come on, I never pegged you to ever be in such a cheesy and serious relationship. I _gotta_ know who this guy is."

So Brooke once again recounted her summer in the simplest of terms possible. Boy meets girl. Girl is really messed up. Boy helps her heal. Boy and girl fall in love.

"So that's it, huh?" Tommy asked rhetorically when Brooke had finished. "Instant connection and all that crap?"

"It's not crap," Brooke sighed but relented slightly. "Okay, maybe it sounds like crap, but it's not. It's just…the way things happened."

"Alright," he accepted her answer and they both grew silent for a moment. Brooke watched him carefully. Throughout her retelling she could see various emotions cross his features. Sympathy. Disbelief. Understanding. Pride.

But now she couldn't quiet tell what he was thinking. At least until he turned to her with a smirk on his lips and a playfulness in his eyes. "He's a total sap, isn't he?"

"What?"

"There's gotta be something wrong with him. I mean the guy you just described sounds pretty perfect. But with all this romanticism and emotions crap I figure he's gotta be a total pussy."

"You're fucking awful, you know that?" Brooke glared at him.

"Well I was going to say he's probably bad in bed, but based on what I heard last night, he's not," Tom continued, loving the discomfort he was causing Brooke. "By the way, you two practically made my ears bleed. Seriously, that's something I never ever wanted to hear."

Brooke chuckled good naturedly now. "Well, what can I say? I aim to please."

"Uch," Tom grimaced. "Dually noted."

Brooke shoved his shoulder. "Get you mind out of the gutter. Or out from up your ass. I can't tell where it is these days."

"Ouch," Tom brought a hand to his heart, feigning offense, "that hurts, B."

"Yeah, well you deserve it."

Tom shook his head with a smile. "Come on, let's go back inside. As much as I love our little chats, I'm guessing Mr. Perfect is waiting inside for you."

"Ahh yes," Brooke said as she stood and followed him across the grass and towards the house. "He's probably dying in there with Rachel."

Tom let out a loud laugh, "probably."

They made it back into the house just in time to hear the doorbell ring through the large and open rooms.

"You guys expecting anyone?" Tom asked.

"Not that I know of," Brooke shrugged.

_"What the hell are you doing here!?"_

Brooke and Tom froze at Lucas' yell and as after their widened eyes met in worry, they bolted for the front of the house.

The door was slightly ajar and Brooke could see Rachel standing just outside of it with her arms folded in front of her chest, but when she grabbed the handle and whipped the door open she was able to see what was really going on.

Lucas was standing on the stairs, towering over Adam who was on the driveway a few steps below.

"Look I—" Adam stopped when he saw Brooke and Tom appear at the door. "Brooke I just want to talk to you."

"We have nothing to talk about," Brooke said calmly and evenly.

"Please, Brooke," he pleaded but his voice was losing patience.

"Didn't you get the message along with the right hook? Stay away from Brooke!" Lucas' voice was powerful and unwavering, and he clenched his fist at his side, ready to strike again.

Brooke stepped up and reached down for Lucas' hand, waiting until he unclenched his fist before intertwining her fingers with his.

"What do you want?" Brooke asked, making sure her ex knew she wasn't happy at all. Most of the left side of his face was bruised and slightly swollen, but even with that Brooke could see that his pride was getting in the way of what he had gone there to do.

"Can we talk…alone?"

"No." No hesitation or emotion.

"Please?" he asked softly.

"No." No hesitation. Slight annoyance.

"Fine," he gave in; his shoulders slumped in defeat for a moment before he attempted to straighten himself out again but to no avail. With all eyes on him and the silence enveloping him until he spoke, he felt like he was suffocating.

"I'm sorry," he finally croaked out. "I was…I was drunk and I wasn't thinking and you know I didn't mean it. I'm just…sorry."

Brooke watched him for a moment, debating whether she should just walk away, slap him, or just stay silent and watch him squirm.

"Okay," she finally said.

"Okay?" Adam was a little confused and he hesitated for a moment, "so we're good, right?"

Brooke squinted slightly as if trying to figure out if he had actually just asked that. She let out a small laugh in disbelief. "Did you really just ask me that?" She didn't give Adam time to respond. "No, we're not okay. We will never be okay. Deal with it."

And with one final glare Brooke dropped Lucas' hand, turned on her heel and headed right back inside.

Lucas followed immediately and Rachel lingered for a moment and then told Adam to get off of her property before heading inside too.

Tom stayed the longest, standing out on the stone front steps watching as Adam turned and went back to his car. He thought about Brooke and Rachel inside, he outside and Adam as he drove off, and he couldn't help but wonder when had they all changed? When had they become the people they are now?

He knew that the night back in freshman year had been the single most defining moment of his life. The single decision that _Adam_ had made changed him forever.

He wondered when that moment came for Adam. Did it ever, or was Adam always like that and they were all too blind to see it?

Rachel had changed too. It must have been after he had left for LA, but somewhere along the lines of drunken parties and hookups, Rachel had somehow grown a sense of standards and morals.

And Brooke, he wondered when her moment was. Was it when Matt died? Or was it when Lucas came into her life? Or was it even earlier than that? Maybe sometime during the past year when she realized she had hit bottom and discovered what was really important to her.

The four of them had been best friends, and now…

* * *

When all four had gathered back inside everything was quieter. There was no light hearted joking or even comforting words; just the silence of not quite knowing what to say.

Brooke was the first to break the silence and the tension, turning to Lucas with eyes clouded with an undecipherable emotion and asked if they could leave; get away from the drama and everyone she knows. She simply asked if they could go home.

"Are you sure you want to do that, Brooke?" Rachel asked softly, but Brooke didn't answer, she just kept her eyes trained on Lucas as he realized what she was asking.

"Yeah," Lucas finally said with a small smile. "We can go."

Just as quietly as the rest, Tom offered to drive them to the airport. Lucas went upstairs to get their bags and Tom to get the car as Brooke and Rachel said goodbye.

This time it wasn't nearly as dramatic. No teary goodbye at the airport or worries about the other's well being.

This time it was a simple goodbye. A quick hug and "I'll talk to you soon" but nothing more.

Their friendship hadn't changed. Adam's hurtful words could never touch something so sacred to them. But Brooke's place in their world had shifted. To what they didn't know, but they knew it was different now.

* * *

"Hey, Tommy?" Brooke asked from the back seat of the car on the way to the airport. Lucas was sitting up front with Tom making small talk as Brooke sat quietly in the back staring out the window.

"Yeah?" He glanced in the rearview mirror to look at her.

"Do you think you could take us back to the city instead?"

"You sure?" he glanced back again.

"Yeah, there's something I want to do before we leave."

"Alright," he said with a slight grin. "Sounds a little sketchy, but why not."

Brooke rolled her eyes and let herself smile for a minute. "Can you take us to my house?"

-

They had been dropped not long later by Tom with a promise to keep in touch this time around and a quick "good luck" at the end.

They stood in front of Rachel's building, looking directly across the street at Brooke's building.

"Brooke?" Lucas asked, hoping to gain her attention.

"Yeah?" She didn't take her eyes from the building.

"What are we doing here?"

"Just uh…just give me a minute," she asked softly and Lucas complied.

Brooke kept her eyes trained on the building but Lucas watched Brooke most of the time, waiting for some sort of sign to tell him what was going on.

And then she tensed. She sucked in a breath and every muscle in her body tensed.

Lucas followed her line of sight just in time to see an older brunette under the awning of Brooke's building. She stepped onto the pavement and seemed to look around for a moment before slipping her sunglasses on and turning to walk down the street. It wasn't until she was at the corner and crossing the street that Brooke finally relaxed.

"Brooke? Who was that?" Lucas asked softly, already knowing the answer but needing to hear it.

"That was my mother," Brooke informed him without looking in his direction.

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh" Brooke let out a small breath of a laugh. "Come on," she took his hand and grabbed the large bag she had at her side before pulling Lucas across the street.

"Brooke, what are we doing?" Lucas asked.

"I just need to drop something off."

"O-kayyy," Lucas said, following her into the building.

"Brooke," the doorman smiled and Brooke returned the smile, silently thanking him for not bringing up her random appearance.

Brooke led them towards the elevators and pressed the up button.

"We're going up?" Lucas asked skeptically.

"Yep," Brooke answered quickly as she watched the numbers tick down as the elevator got closer. It stopped on the sixth floor and Brooke closed her eyes, willing it to move forward as she pictured her apartment.

"No." Brooke said and opened her eyes.

"What?"

"No, we're not going up," she decided and walked back towards the front desk.

"Brooke!" Lucas called and followed her. "What's going on? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she answered curtly and immediately regretted it; he didn't deserve to be treated like that. "I just..." her voice softened, "I thought I could go up, but I don't think I can."

"Homecoming cut short?" the doorman asked with a smile.

"Hey Eddie," Brooke smiled, "you think you can do me a favor?"

"Of course."

"Can you send this bag upstairs when someone comes home?"

"Sure," he smiled and took the bag.

"And here's the catch."

"Uh oh."

"Ha ha," Brooke deadpanned. "I just need you to not tell my mom it was from me okay? Tell her a friend of mine delivered it for me or whatever, just don't tell her I was here."

Eddie looked at her suspiciously. "Okay. Only if you tell me who the stud is." he nodded over towards Lucas who was standing a few feet behind Brooke.

"That would be Lucas," Brooke smiled cheekily and gave him a wink before backing away. "See you in a few weeks," she waved and then walked out with Lucas.

"You sure you're alright?" Lucas asked, feeling a little helpless for asking so many times.

"Yeah," Brooke's smiley demeanor had faltered when they left the building. "Will you hail a cab for us? I have to make a phone call."

"Sure," Lucas smiled comfortingly and placed a gentle kiss on her lips before taking a few steps out onto the street to get a cab.

Brooke took out her phone and dialed the familiar number and waited through the ringing for the expected answering machine.

"Hey mom, it's me," Brooke finally says after the beep. She's barely a full sentence in and she can already feel herself choking up. "I just called because I haven't heard from you in a while and um, I wanted to see if you were okay." She took a deep breath to steady her words and push back the oncoming sob. "The package I left you really helped me this summer. I know it'll be hard to look at, but please try. I really think it will help you too." She took a few deep breaths but the tears rolled down her cheeks anyway, and she knew that even in a voice message her mother would know she was crying. She could see Lucas flag down a cab and she knew it was time to go. "I gotta go now, but uh, maybe I'll talk to you soon. I don't know, maybe not," she was starting to stutter over her words. "I love you, mom. Bye."

* * *

After that they had made it to the airport and back to Tree Hill without any drama. Brooke had later explained that she had brought the photo albums she had made in the beginning of the summer home to her mom, hoping that facing the past would help her come to terms with the present.

Brooke had apologized profusely for cutting their little excursion short, but Lucas just smiled and laughed, telling her than in twenty four hours he had had enough drama to last him the rest of the summer.

They had only been gone for a day and he was exhausted. All he could think about as he drove home after dropping Brooke off was to crawl into bed and sleep for a few days.

Unfortunately, that wouldn't happen. He realized this as soon as he tried to pull into the driveway at Dan's house. He was confused for a moment, thinking Dan would be gone until Sunday and Nathan and Haley were at the beach house.

But then he recognized the cars. Dan's and Deb's were both in the opened garage, Nathan's was there too, and one last car which he didn't recognize at first.

And then it clicked. It was his Uncle Keith's car.

Something was definitely up; the Scott's were never ones for family get togethers.

He parked his car and grabbed his overnight bag and headed to the front door.

As soon as he was inside he could feel the tension. Low and stressed voices came from the living room, but otherwise the house was totally silent. The lighting was dim and he could smell his father's favorite scotch in the air as he neared the living room.

"Hi," Lucas said uneasily from the entrance to the room. He could now see that his mother was even among the guests. If that didn't set an alarm off in his head it would have been Dan's expressionless face or the fact that Nathan was sitting by himself in the corner of the room with a rush of emotions running through his eyes.

"Lucas," Dan said firmly but emotionlessly. "Sit down. We need to talk."

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!!  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	15. The World Has Changed

**Hey everyone!**

**So, like I'm sure you've read in plenty of other ANs, school has started for me. I'm not exactly sure what that means with my writing schedule because to be honest, I update faster when I'm in school. Something about the lack of time to write makes me write faster.**

**Anyway, did I do something wrong in the last chapter? I had nowhere near as many reviews as I have had in the past with this story. I know it was a bit of a filler, but I would realllllly appreciate some more reviews this chapter. I need to know what people who are reading think about where I'm going with this.**

**Thanks so much to those of you who did review.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

"Lucas," Dan said firmly but emotionlessly. "Sit down. We need to talk."

The air was thick with tension and emotion, and Lucas could barely breathe in it. Ignoring Dan's request Lucas balled his fists at his sides and scanned the room once again.

Dan sat in one of the single chairs in the room. Alone. Emotionally separated from everyone else yet unreadable.

Deb sat in the adjacent chair with crossed legs and hands in her lap. Her eyes were downcast as if they were hiding pain and guilt.

His mom and Keith sat together on the small sofa to his right. Keith held her hand comfortingly as he tried to bite back his own emotions. Karen looked worn down by the recent flurry of stress and worry. Her eyes were fixated on him, pleading for something completely unknown to him.

His eyes found Nathan last. He was seated in a chair by the large windows to his left. He looked lost. Lost inside his head and lost in the world outside of it too.

"Lucas," Karen spoke, asking him to follow Dan's orders.

"I'll stand," Lucas swallowed, remaining defensive. His features hardened and Karen sighed slightly, knowing that the battle of whether he were to sit or not wasn't the important one.

"Dan, are you going to start?" Keith asked, trying to hurry the process up and hopefully cut the tension.

Dan remained silent. Lucas looked at him but couldn't find his eyes. For the first time in as long as Lucas could remember, Dan wasn't looking directly at him with some smug glint to his features. Instead his eyes were glazed over as he stared ahead.

Lucas' eyes turned frantic as he once again searched the room for answers. Nathan was nearly catatonic in the corner. Deb was calmer than he had ever seen her. And his mother looked to be on the verge of breaking down.

_What the hell is going on?_ he wanted to yell.

And as if sensing his distress, Keith stood and walked over to him, standing beside him and placing a fatherly hand on his shoulder.

"Luke and I are going to talk about this in private," Keith told everyone with no objections. Lucas watched as his mother's and uncle's eyes met in understanding. She seemed hesitant to let them go but knew it was for the best.

Keith leads him to the kitchen and motions for them to sit down at the small table. Lucas can barely feel his legs carrying him, but he complies nonetheless.

"Keith," Lucas' voice cracks slightly and he doesn't know why. He doesn't have an inkling to what's going on or when it happened because he decided to ignore all calls from Tree Hill while he was away. All he knows now is that things aren't as he left them less than thirty six hours ago.

"Luke, this is going to be hard to hear," Keith starts and Lucas desperately searches his eyes for information but he can't read anything but raw emotion. Keith takes a deep breath and Lucas nearly jumps out of his skin in anticipation. His insides still want him to scream and yell to find out what's going on, but he can't seem to form the words to do so. He's stuck in silence. A waiting silence.

Then the words starting slipping from Keith's lips. Explanations first.

Dan was never gone on business trips. Just the first time he left nearly a month ago. The rest he was at the doctor.

Lucas' mind was racing but he tried painstakingly to listen and understand what Keith was telling him.

Dan had heart problems when he was away that first time. He started seeing a cardiologist in Charlotte. That was the reason for his trips. He needed to go back for check ups and tests and a diagnosis.

He got the diagnosis last week. He had never even intended to leave Tree Hill this week. His plan was to stay at the beach house and by Deb's convincing, give his sons one last weekend to live without worry.

_Worry about what?_ Lucas' mind begged him to ask but he was frozen. His eyes said the words for him though because Keith knew it was time for the real discussion.

These words seem to echo in his head.

HCM.

Hereditary.

Tests.

50/50 chance.

_No!_ Lucas wanted to scream again. The word was caught somewhere in his throat.

He shook his head violently and stood from the table.

The first half of the summer flashed before his eyes. The way Dan pushed them, and the secrecy in the trips. It was like the explanation was the final piece of the puzzle and now it made sense.

But no, it didn't make sense.

"This is ridiculous!" finally the words came.

"Luke," Keith said softly, trying to calm his nephew. He was going to half the take the test too. And he was scared and he was angry and he was worried too.

But Lucas was a kid. He didn't know how to handle this quite yet.

"No!" Lucas yelled. "No!" his voice fell to an eerie calm. There was a steadiness that hadn't there before. "I don't have it," he said slowly. "I don't have it. I would know. I've worked myself too hard not to know. If I had it I would have had problems." The control over his words was quickly fading and they were shaky again.

"I don't have it," he said again. The rationales were speeding through his head. He looked nothing like Dan. He was slender and blond and…and Nathan was the one that looked exactly like him. Nathan was the one who got his genes. It couldn't possible be him.

"Luke," Keith said again. The sympathy made Lucas sick to his stomach. "You have to calm down. You have to—"

"No." His voice was steady again. "No, I'm done here."

And then he was gone. Out of the kitchen. Out of the house. Out into a world that had changed since the last time he looked around.

* * *

She was frozen. At a stop sign two blocks away from the park. The car silent. The sun just barely beginning to set in the distance.

Frozen.

She couldn't concentrate. There were too many thoughts.

She had come back to Tree Hill intent to spend the night alone and reflect.

She was angry with herself. She went to New York intent on making it a good experience and despite what had happened in the Hamptons that could have happened.

Instead she got scared. Instead she stood across the street and waited.

She should have gone in earlier. She should have gone to see her mother. She should have faced her fears instead of once again running away to Tree Hill.

That's what she told herself.

She at least could have stopped to see her father.

At most she could have gone to visit her brother's grave.

That's why she was angry with herself. She should have stayed.

Instead she ran again. Where was the progress if she once again ended up in Tree Hill?

That's where her thoughts were when she got home.

Then Haley showed up. Teary eyed and nervous, Haley showed up just as Brooke had settled into the den, intent on spending the night watching TV and dealing with the fact that she had disappointed herself once again. But then Haley showed up.

And she told Brooke what had happened while they were away.

Gone barely a day and a half and the whole world had changed for the Scotts.

So Haley told her the story. And then she told her that Lucas had freaked out and left the house. No one went after him because no one knew what to say to him.

And that's how she ended up frozen at a stop sign. She went to go find Lucas.

But she couldn't seem to move forward. She had been through this already and she wasn't sure if she could do it again.

But then she would close her eyes and she could see him. She could see him laughing as he played with the guys on the rivercourt and she could see him smiling down at her as they laid in the hammock in her back yard.

So she slowly opened her eyes again, took a deep breath, and pressed her foot to the gas pedal.

She was at the rivercourt in less than thirty seconds, and while she wasn't at all surprised to see him there, she was surprised to see what he was doing.

She had expected him to be brooding; sitting on the bench or in the middle of the court just looking around and reflecting. She didn't expect him to be playing harder than she had every seen him. Every time he drove for a lay up or pounded the ball into the ground she saw his concentration increase.

He had heard the car pull up to the court, he had heard the door open and close, and he heard the sound of her flip flops smacking her feet as she walked to him. But not once did he lift his head to look at her.

"Lucas?" she asked with an undecipherable tone.

He glanced up at her and mumbled a quick "hey" before taking another shot and sprinting for the rebound.

"Lucas what are you doing?" she asked again with more urgency.

"Just playing," Lucas told her, barely taking his eyes from the ball.

Brooke sighed. "Haley told me what's going on."

Lucas stopped.

"Yeah," Brooke said and took a few steps closer to him. "I'm sorry, Luke."

"Why? I don't have it."

"Luke," Brooke shook her head.

"I'm serious!" his voiced rose and Brooke took a step back. "Look at me! Would I be able to do this if I had a head condition?"

"Luke," she repeated pleadingly.

"What?!" he yelled. "You want me to do suicides or something? I'll do them because I _can_ because I'm _fine_."  
She stood there silent. Shocked. Disappointed. Scared.

Lucas stood staring at her for a moment before slamming the ball to a stop at the foul line. He turned and headed for the baseline, immediately starting to sprint suicides.

"Lucas!" Brooke called out, now slightly annoyed.

He didn't stop.

"Lucas!" she yelled this time, her anger more than evident. She stepped into his running line and waited until he lifted his head and stopped just before crashing into her.

"I get that you're in denial," Brooke said calmly and continued as Lucas tried to cut her off. "I get that you're scared and freaking out, but I will not watch you do this to yourself. Don't you see? Right now you're doing to yourself exactly what Dan did to you the whole summer. He pushed you to prove to himself that you were both fine, and you _hated_ him for the way he treated you. Now you're doing it to yourself."  
Lucas stared at her, his breathing heaving and his resolve weakening with each word.

"If you want to do this to yourself, fine, but then I'm leaving. I'm not talking about leaving the court, Lucas, I'm leaving Tree Hill."

Lucas' breathing was still labored, but after a few quiet seconds Brooke realized he wasn't tired from running, he was trying not to cry.

Brooke immediately softened. "Look, I know you need to come to terms with this on your own, but I've seen denial in these kind of situations, okay? I won't stand by and watch you self destruct. If you need me, I'll be there for you one hundred percent…but can't watch you be like this."

Lucas gave the slightest of nods, such a slight movement that Brooke was barely able to see it.

"I—" Lucas tried and immediately the first tear spilled from his eyes. "I'm scared." He lips moved but the sound didn't leave his mouth.

And in that moment Brooke's heart broke for him. She watched as he took a shaky step back. His eyes quickly traveled around the court as he realized how much the last hour had taken out of him. He let his legs give out and he fell to his knees, bowing his head as his shoulders shook with choked and unsteady sobs.

"Lucas!" Brooke was with him in a second, dropping to the cement court and wrapping her arms around him.

"I just want to go back," Lucas whispered through ragged breaths. "I just want to go back to before. I won't take it for granted. Not one minute. I just want to go back…"

"Lucas, this isn't you're fault. It's not, okay?" Brooke tried to reason with him. "You're going to be okay. No matter what. I'm here for you. I promise." Tears stung her own eyes as he struggled.

He sucked in a long breath and held it, trying to stop his sobs. After a few seconds he released it and his sobs subsided, but his breathing was erratic and he couldn't control it. He once again tried to stop and Brooke was worried that he would start to hyperventilate, but finally he started to slow down and regain some control.

"It's okay," Brooke continued to whisper into his ear as he laid almost limp in her arms, but somehow still clutching onto her as if she would leave him.

"You're going to be okay. I promise. You're going to be okay, Lucas. You're going to be okay…"

* * *

After sitting at the Rivercourt for what seemed like an endless amount of time, Brooke made the move to help Lucas up to his feet and lead him to the car.

He nearly collapsed into the seat; his body spent from stress and raw emotion and his sore eyes nearly sealed shut from crying.

She had begun driving him back to Dan's house when, almost inaudibly, Lucas asked if she could take him to his mother's house instead.

She nodded and silently drove there, helping him through the side door and into his room. She led him to his bed and watched as he fell asleep almost instantly.

She sat on the side of the bed and gently ran her fingers over his features and through his blonde hair. As she looked down on him it dawned on her that he was wearing the same clothes since that morning; the morning when Tom showed up at the house.

It felt like a lifetime ago.

Carefully Brooke stood from the bed and made her way to Lucas' desk, grabbing a pen and piece of paper she quickly scribbled a note and left it on his nightstand.

Leaning back over him, Brooke kissed him softly on the temple, lingering for a moment with her lips against his skin, but pulling back when he stirred in his light sleep.

Brooke sighed. She knew he wouldn't be sleeping well tonight. No, instead he'd be tossing and turning with thoughts and fears clouding his dreams.

Realizing the headache he would probably wake up with from crying so hard, Brooke figured she'd get him a couple aspirin and some water before she left.

She really couldn't stay tonight. She already did enough with the way she pushed his emotions at the rivercourt. He needed to deal with this on his own first.

As quietly as possible she crossed the room and opened the door, closing it slowly behind her as she stepped into the hallway.

"Brooke?"

Brooke jumped back and let out a small yelp, trying to muffle it by covering her mouth with her hand.

"Karen," Brooke said, lowering her hand to her chest above her pounding heart.

"I'm sorry to scare you, honey," she apologized with a small smile. "Is Lucas in his room?"

"Yeah," Brooke relaxed slightly. "I just brought him back. He's already sleeping though. I was just going to get him some water and aspirin for when he wakes up."

Karen nodded and waved Brooke to follow her as she walked back to the kitchen.

Brooke followed her and was surprised to see a man sitting at the kitchen table when she entered the room.

"Brooke, this is Lucas' uncle, Keith," Karen said as she filled up a glass of water for Lucas.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Scott," Brooke smiled and held her hand out, happy to meet the uncle she had heard so many great things about.

"Likewise," Keith smiled and shook her hand, "and please, call me Keith. Mr. Scott is more Danny's thing."  
"Okay, Keith," Brooke smiled.

"You know I've heard some good things about you."

Brooke raised her eyebrows and blushed slightly. "Good things I hope."

Keith gave her a reassuring smile. "Very good things."

"Brooke?" she turned her attention back to Karen. "How's Lucas? Is he okay?" Karen watched as Brooke sucked in a breath and froze. "Honesty."

Brooke shifted nervously, muttering "honestly" under her breath.

"Honestly? He's okay in the sense that he's not set on trying to induce a heart attack by running suicides at the rivercourt anymore, but right now? I think…he just needs to accept this. I mean, it's weird. At first he was so set on the fact that he didn't have it, but now…now it's like he's convinced he does and he's trying to come to terms with that."

Karen nodded solemnly and whispered a 'thanks'.

"It's just…fresh right now," Brooke continued. "It's a pretty big thing to come home to and since he doesn't really know much about the condition he's having a hard time understanding what he's feeling. He's not okay now, but he'll _be_ okay."

Karen watched Brooke carefully as she spoke, noticing how the girl's eyes seem to glaze over as she spoke. Almost as if she wasn't talking about Lucas. Almost as if she was remembering something from her past.

"Thank you Brooke," Karen said gratefully and Brooke nodded, giving a small closed smile. Karen didn't know if she was jealous or relieved that Brooke seemed to know so much about what was going on with Lucas. She used to be so close with her son, but now it seemed as though Brooke was the only one that could get through to him. While she knew that Lucas was happier than he had ever been when he was with Brooke, it was still saddening to realize that her son no longer needed her the way he used to. That realization made her feel helpless now; she didn't know how to help him with this.

"I should go," Brooke smiled. "My car's by Lucas' door, so I'm just going to bring this to him and then I'll be gone."

Karen nodded. "Goodnight, Brooke."

"Goodnight. It was nice to meet you, Keith."

"You too."

With one last 'bye' Brooke disappeared down out of the kitchen and into Lucas' room again.

* * *

It amazed Brooke that as she walked back into her house, it had been just over an hour since Lucas had dropped her off there.

So much had changed in an hour.

Gone were the thoughts of calling Bevin and apologizing or answering the millions of texts her friends left her after the party. Gone were the worries of the drama back home and what she should have done.

Now the thoughts were much different.

Letting out a deep breath as she locked the door behind her, Brooke made her way towards the den hoping that the TV could settle her mind at least for a little while. Lying down on the couch, she held a hand over her eyes and tried to silence her thoughts.

No such luck.

The TV blaring couldn't shake her thoughts. She didn't know why she thought it would.

Reruns of TV shows she didn't even watch wouldn't be able to cover up the fact that her guy she loves could have a heart condition.

Regardless of whether he did or not, Brooke knew he would be fine physically. It was the emotional part she was worried about.

Would he be able to deal with this if he did have HCM? And if he didn't, would ever be able to get past what Dan put them through this summer?

With her eyes closed and the house silent, not even the thoughts of Lucas could block out the memories.

_This can't be happening to me again…_

* * *

It was barely midnight. He had only slept for a few hours, and now Lucas was lying restlessly staring at the blank ceiling.

From what Keith told him, he knew that basketball – the game he'd loved his entire life – was now in jeopardy to him.

And suddenly he didn't know who he was.

He didn't know how he was supposed to act or how people would look at him. He didn't know what to say about it, and he didn't know how his life was going to change because of it.

All he knew right now was that he was uncertain of just about everything in his life.

All he knew is that he wanted to be alone. In his room. Staring at the ceiling.

Alone.

He didn't want anyone talking to him about this.

He didn't want people telling them what they thought because he didn't know what to think.

He just needed to be alone.

He just needed to process this.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!!  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	16. The All Consuming Silence

**Hey everyone!**

**Sorry for the long wait, but school's been kicking my ass lately and I'm not getting much inspiration from the show. I really hope I have some readers and reviewers left out there.**

**Special thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. And a big shout out to **BroodyGirl23 **and** Toddntan**, for PMing me to get me to write. It really helped.**

**Please, I'm begging everyone reading this to review. I really need your feedback for this.**

**Sorry if there are typos. I wanted to post this ASAP and didn't have time to go through it line by line to check.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

_Today I heard that someone left this earth_

_That someone disappeared left no mark here_

_Today I heard that someone just got up and left himself_

_Lying on the ground_

It was an unnerving feeling for Lucas the next morning when he lay in his bed staring at the ceiling. He didn't want to talk to anyone and listen to anyone or hear anything at all, yet the complete silence he was in couldn't bring him the peace he craved.

He felt trapped in his own skin and in his own room, yet his confinement was self imposed.

He wanted to scream and cry but he couldn't open his mouth.

He felt lost; no longer unable to understand who he was.

"Lucas?" The slightly muffled voice of his mother made its way through the door and into his ears.

His jaw set as his teeth grinded together and his fists clenched at his side. Every muscle tensed in annoyance and unnecessary anger.

"What?" He managed to spit out, not bothering to hide the contempt in his voice.

"We're leaving in half an hour, so please get ready soon," he could hear the sympathy in her voice and it somehow angered him more.

"Fine," he muttered loud enough for her to hear.

After waiting another minute just to make sure Karen had left him alone, Lucas slowly rose from the bed, wincing at the heaviness he felt in his body. Legs like lead, worries being carried on his shoulders, and stress weighing down his chest.

He made his way to the bathroom quickly and locked the door behind him, hoping to avoid human contact for as long as possible.

He let the water run for a moment as he stared into the mirror at his tired eyes and then undressed.

Stepping in, Lucas hung his head down and closed his eyes.

He stood there. Silent. Frozen. Hoping, praying, wishing that the water would just wash it all away.

* * *

_Today is quiet in my town_

It amazed her how much had gone wrong in such a short amount of time. There was nothing to do but let everything consume her.

First there was New York. Nevermind the fact that she wasn't able to do half the things she had wanted to while she was there, but so much had gone wrong. Her ex took went about five steps too far and humiliated her. Her boyfriend punched her ex in front of everyone which at the moment was debatably good or bad. She had caused a scene at one of her oldest friend's birthday party.

And she left New York without talking to her parents, without visiting her brother's grave, without resolving so many of the issues she had set out to, and for the first time in years she was left not knowing how Rachel felt about everything that was going on. That last feeling alone was too unsettling – the tension and the distance between them nearly haunted her.

But Lucas told her that he loved her. And she told him the same. And that seemed to make everything okay for a moment.

But that moment seemed to have been temporarily forgotten by the fact that he could possibly have a heart condition.

When she first saw him after the news, it seemed like he was convinced that he was fine. That he needed to be fine.

But then he cracked and as the night wore on, Brooke realized that he seemed to _know_ that he had HCM. Despite his previous denial and conviction, it was as if some visceral force washed over him and he just _knew_.

She watched him shut down and she saw the look in Karen's eyes and suddenly something locked away deep within her grief floated to the surface and she could feel it all again.

She needed to get out. Get out and away from her thoughts and focus on something else. It was a beautiful day after all. But Brooke wouldn't know from experiencing it. She only knew because she caught a glimpse of the weather channel as she flipped through the TV stations all morning. She woke up, got breakfast, and settled down on the couch in the den ready to watch. She couldn't even look outside.

It was one of the things she noticed in her and Lucas' short trip to New York. While in the city the air was still hot and congested and exactly what you would expect for mid July, it was much hotter in North Carolina. While she rarely encountered the southern drawls she had expected to find, if there was one thing that reminded her of how far south she had traveled it was the heat.

And that was why she was usually content on staying inside her air-conditioned house on a day like this. But something was different today. Today she was left at the mercy of worries about Lucas and memories because despite how the sounds coming from the TV echoed all around the house, the silence consumed her.

* * *

_Today two boys disappeared without noise_

_and I wish that I was them flying somewhere overhead_

_And tonight in silence, two lovers hate and find_

_One is bored_

_One is angry_

_but neither one of them is right, oh_

Since emerging from his bedroom earlier that morning, Lucas had only uttered two sentences. "I'm fine," and "please just leave me alone today."

He sat in the back of the car as he mother and uncle took him to the cardiologist. He had his earphones plugged so not to hear anything and was listening to what Brooke had dubbed his "brooding music".

The tunes seemed fitting for the occasion.

He sat quietly in the waiting room too. He kept his ipod on and his stare blank, but once in a while just out of the corner of his eye he would see Keith or his mom glancing at him or trying to say something to him. And when he saw this all he would do was clench his jaw tight, suck in a deep breath through his nose and avert his gaze.

After nearly fifteen minutes of waiting, Lucas was sure that he had stared at and examined every inch of the room from his view in his seat; from the dreary color of the walls and the regulation waiting room chairs, to the colors of the stickers labeling the files on the nurses' desk and the way part of the number '2' didn't light up above the elevator.

And just as he thought he could drift to sleep in his chair, his curiosity was peaked when a man walked out of an exam room and towards the nurses' desk. He was strikingly familiar.

He was clearly a doctor based on the white lab coat his wore. His hair was just beginning to gray hair and the small set of glasses set in front of his eyes seemed distinct but he couldn't place the face.

"Lucas Scott?" He looked up from his chart and scanned the room before his eyes settled on Lucas who by that point had taken his earphones out to concentrate on the man in front of him.

"Yeah," Lucas stood, "that's me."

"It's nice to meet you, Lucas," the man smiled warmly and held his hand out to shake which Lucas politely accepted. "My name is Dr. Henson, if you follow me we can get started," he waited for Lucas to nod before continuing. "Would you like your mother to join us?"

"No," Lucas answered immediately and cringed slightly at his eagerness. "I'll be fine alone."

"Alright then," Dr. Henson said and looked over to Karen. "I'll bring your boy back soon," he smiled warmly and motioned for Lucas to follow him.

Lucas did, not looking back and trying desperately to bite back the stab of guilt he felt in his stomach for the pain and worry he probably just caused his mother.

But he couldn't have her there. He couldn't have her holding his hand and telling him that she was there for him. He didn't want to make an even bigger deal out of all of this. He just wanted to do this alone.

He stepped into the exam room and sat down on the table as instructed. Dr. Henson sat on his own chair as he flipped through Lucas' medical history quickly.

"So Lucas," he started and looked back up at Lucas. "I know that this is probably a lot for you right now, so I'm going to make this as quick and easy as possible."

Lucas nodded again. "What exactly are you going to do?"

"Just a couple of basic tests; an EKG and what we call a cardiac catheterization, but don't worry, I'll explain them all as we go through them."

Lucas nodded once again and tried to ignore the way his hands had become slightly clammy and his heart had started beating harder.

"Normally we'd take about a day to analyze some of the results, but since it's a Friday we don't want you waiting the whole weekend to find out what's going on. Besides, your father asked that we take care of this as quickly as possible for you."

"Okay," Lucas said meekly but then froze. _Father?_ How did Dr. Henson know Dan?

It took a moment, but he finally placed the face. Three weeks ago Lucas and Nathan were just leaving Dan's house when Dr. Henson had shown up. The brothers had been more than surprised when Dan had emerged from his study and ushered the man inside and closed the doors behind them. Lucas and Nathan had never seen Dan so nervous or so secretive.

Dan really had known about this all along and still put his sons through hell.

All Lucas' plans for the future were now in jeopardy with the possibility of this disease and the loss of basketball. He was trapped with Dan who was even pulling the strings with his doctor.

"You ready to get started?" Dr. Henson asked and Lucas snapped out of his thoughts.

"Do I have a choice?"

* * *

Wit the jingle of the bells above her head, Brooke stepped into Karen's café and scanned the room for a familiar face.

She found it in Haley behind the counter.

"Hey," Brooke smiled softly as she sat down on one of the stools in front of the counter.

Haley looked up and smiled too, a mixture of genuine delight, worry and sympathy. "Hey. What can I do for you?"

"Um, not much," Brooke admitted with a shrug.

"Bored?" Haley guessed, knowing that there wasn't much to do in the small town during the summer.

"Understatement," Brooke confirmed. "So how are you?"

"Good," Haley said with a smile out of reflex, but quickly sagged when she realized how untrue that statement was. "Okay."

"How's Nathan?" Brooke asked.

"He's okay. He uh, he doesn't have HCM. He got the results back today and he doesn't have it, but he's still pretty freaked out by the whole thing. He won't even look at Dan after all this."

Brooke nodded. "It'll get better."

"I hope so," Haley gave a weak smile and stopped to help a customer.

"So how are you and Nathan?" Brooke asked when Haley returned.

"We're good," Haley said with a smile that wasn't forced this time. "Really good."

"That's great," Brooke smiled genuinely too.

"Yeah," Haley kept smiling. "What about with you and Lucas?"

Brooke hesitates.

She has _no _idea how to answer that question.

She sucks in a deep breath and shrugs. "We're good," she says and realizes that is probably the worst answer she could possibly give.

"Good?" Haley asks skeptically and Brooke can't tell what she is referring to.

"Yeah," Brooke says with false confidence that they can both see through. "I mean…I don't really know what I mean," she admits. "Lucas and I are good. Really good. New love always is, right?"

Haley smiles knowingly and nods, but her eyes turn serious when she sees that Brooke has more to say.

"…But with recent developments…I don't really know how Lucas is anymore."

Haley nods again and for a moment it stuns Brooke how someone she didn't know before this summer, someone she still doesn't know all that well, can understand what she's trying to say.

"What about you? How are _you_?"

Her breath catches and her heart starts beating much harder than it should for someone who is sitting down in a quiet café late in the morning.

"What about me?" she finally manages to get out.

"How are you dealing with this?" Haley asks, not realizing how the question is affecting the brunette in front of her.

"I'm fine," Brooke says as if it's obvious. It's another clear lie but Haley doesn't catch this one because Brooke has already had more than enough practice perfecting the line.

"Oh…okay," Haley says, slightly thrown off by the defensiveness she detected in Brooke's voice. "It's just that I couldn't help but realize that this isn't the first time you've been through something like this…and I don't know, it must be hard."

Brooke freezes and continues staring at Haley for a minute, trying to come up with something to say. But she can't think of anything, so she looks down to the edge of the counter in front of her and closes her eyes tightly.

Her family had been battered from the beginning of it all, but this was what had sent Brooke down her own personal spiral towards a breakdown.

She had wanted to talk about it at first. She wanted to understand what was going on and she wanted to be able to figure out what everyone was going through. But then her parents said not to tell anyone. So she kept silent. And in that silence everything she felt was magnified.

And then came the guilt. She felt guilty for feeling something. In the absence of anyone to help her through it all she felt guilty for feeling some sort of pain. She told herself that she shouldn't – she wasn't the one who was sick and she wasn't the one who had to deal with it all.

But she felt something because every hour of every day she worried about her brother, because every hour of every day her family seemed to move farther away from what it used to be, because every day it all built up more until she hit rock bottom.

And now she's back to feeling guilty. She knows now that it's okay to be worried and be stressed and feel something bad even though she's not the one actually going through it. But that doesn't stop the voice in her head that won't go away; the one that says she's being selfish by feeling something.

"Brooke—"

"I'm fine," she says with far less emotion than Haley thinks is normal, and even though she doesn't tell the truth, even though her statement says nothing at all, Haley gets it again.

Brooke looks up to meet her eyes and she nearly cant take the compassion. It makes her want to slide to the floor, curl up into a ball and just _cry_.

Haley is staring back at Brooke and she feels an overwhelming set of emotions run through her; worry for her best friend, sympathy for the friend sitting across from her, and relief that she never went through anything like that with her own siblings.

When she had first found out about what happened to Brooke – what happened to her family – she realized how lucky she was. Despite the fact that she hadn't seen some of her siblings in over a year and rarely talked to others, she _could_ talk to them. She knew they were okay.

"The hardest part," Brooke speaks again and finally looks back up at Haley, trying to hold the emotion back from her voice. The detachment she hears in the words however tell much more than she intended, "was that he never talked to me about it."

She pauses for a moment and Haley stands perfectly still, not quite knowing how to react, but with warm eyes waiting for her to continue.

"It's not like you could tell day to day that something was…not wrong, but just not right. And I guess because of that, he never spoke about it; as if he could pretend that it wasn't there at all. The whole time, we only had three conversations about it. The first time he was in denial. The second time he was freaking out because of his meds. The last he was scared of telling his girlfriend."

Haley stood silent for a moment. "I'm sorry, Brooke," she whispered.

Brooke looked down again and smiled; a smile completely devoid of anything resembling happiness.

"I'm not sure I could go through it again, you know? I'm not sure I could deal with it all if Lucas shut me out. I can't watch someone I love go through something like that and have absolutely _no_ idea what was going on with them."

* * *

The weekend came and went without any semblance of activity; just staying inside and failing to keep busy.

She could feel how it was all wearing on her. Keeping herself out of the heat and inside somehow made her lazier. Even in the absence of any real physical activity, she was tired; her body lethargic and muscles begging to be left in bed.

Yet she stood over the sink, staring at the white porcelain as the cool water spilled into it, she begged herself to stop remembering.

Not only did she have to deal with the worry about Lucas – whom she hadn't heard from since Thursday night – but the memories that uncontrollably swirled through her mind.

This summer had been good to her. She had been able to deal with the loss and the constant reminder. She had learned to move on without forgetting – how to live her days in happiness instead of grief. But now things have once again changed and she is forced to confront memories that cause her chest to clench from the inside with want to cry.

First comes one of the three conversations. That links to the day she and Matt compared their first fake IDs to see which was worse. That flows quickly to the times he would chase her around the apartment screaming to their mother that she was on drugs, despite the fact that they both knew it was a lie. That flowed to earlier fights around the house; ones with pillows swung so quickly in a moment of fun loving anger that the victim had no choice to be hit hard and laugh about it, Nerf footballs that would be thrown at her head or back as she sat at her desk and he ran unannounced into her room with the intention of distracting her from whatever she was doing, or even the truly angry ones that brought forth their yelling and debating skills as they fought over the remote.

She screwed her eyes shut. It seemed like the harder she tried not to remember, the more she did.

She had worked so hard this summer to come to a point where the memories wouldn't haunt her through out the day, but would rather be a small and happy glimpse at the past and the bond they used to share.

Now even the possibility of Lucas being diagnosed with HCM had sent her mind into endless round of free association with the deepest memories held in her mind and in her heart.

Shaking her head and focusing back on the stream of water, and in attempt to rid herself of the weary state Brooke cupped her hands until they were filled and shut her eyes before brining the water to splash across her face.

Once.

Twice.

Seven, eight.

She lost count of how many time she repeated the action before the ringing of the doorbell cut her off.

_Oh, somebody say something  
Somebody say something  
Somebody say something cause I can't take this silence anymore_

Fourteen seconds. Only fourteen seconds from he rang the doorbell and to when the door pulled open in front of him.

"Hey," a small smile graced her face.

"Hey," his voice was quiet and shy. He knew she knew. He couldn't tell her himself, but he asked Nathan to do it for him. As she stared back at him he felt relief above all else. She wasn't staring at him with pity or worry like everyone else had. She looked at him with genuine happiness and a comfort that hadn't been taken away as other parts of his life changed dramatically.

"Come in," Brooke shook herself from the gaze and opened the door wide. Following her into the kitchen, Lucas watched as she threw a small towel down onto the table and move to the refrigerator.

"How are you doing?" Brooke asked and for a moment Lucas was stunned. He had been asked that question to many times lately that he was surprised that her version of it sounded different. He worlds molded together in a casualness that revealed genuine curiosity and politeness rather than the unsubtle attempt at asking about his heart defect.

He didn't know though that the tone came from a year's worth of practicing, and that the concealment felt more like second nature now than she cared to admit.

"Okay," he choked out when he realized he hadn't responded yet. "I'm okay," and for the first time all weekend, that statement didn't feel like a total lie.

"Did you eat breakfast yet?" Brooke asked as she opened the fridge and scanned its contents. There wasn't much there. She should have already known since she had cereal for dinner the night before.

"No, but I'm good, thanks."

Shrugging in indifference Brooke shut the door and turned around, meeting his eyes instantly.

"I missed you," she whispered and for some reason chastised herself for being able to relinquish her self control around him so easily. She didn't know why, but she didn't want to admit it that fast.

"I missed you too," he let a true smile cross his features; the first in too long.

She took a quick step to meet him in the middle and wrapped her arms around his neck, closing her eyes as his lips met hers in a soft kiss.

And then it happened fast.

She was too focused on his lips, his hands, his presence to realize what they were doing and when she finally pulls back for a proper breath of air, they're already upstairs in her unmade bed.

Her tank top was discarded somewhere along the way, but she really has no recollection of where. His tee shirt was thrown to the side as soon as they entered her bedroom. The shorts were quick to follow.

She knows they're moving too fast. His movements have an unsteadiness that she can't quite describe yet, but it's enough to tell her that even though they've had sex so many times before, right now they're moving too fast.

Whether or not he admits it, he's a little broken right now and this isn't the best way for him to heal.

But she can feel his arousal through his boxers, and as he reaches around to unclasp her bra, she knows he's too far gone to stop.

Then his hand trails a searing path up the inside of her thigh and he whispers _I love you_ into her skin, and even though she knows better than to be doing this now, she's knows that she's too far gone too.

_Today is_

_Oh, Today is_

_Today is quiet in my town_

When it's all over they lay on the bed on their backs, bodies slick with a thing layer of sweat, legs still entwined and breathing still uneven.

The pleasure that started in her core is still radiating through her body, and as she stares up at the ceiling she replays it over and over in her head.

And then it clicks. She knows what she was trying to think of. His movements were _frantic_. As if he was afraid that the opportunity would be gone before he could fully enjoy it. As if he was trying to prove something to himself and to her. Or maybe it was making sure that nothing had changed between them; that despite everything around him he still had her there with him.

He tugs on her hand and she rolls to be closer to him and lays her head on his chest, feeling and hearing his heart thumping beneath. She brings her hand up and traces indecipherable patterns across the rest of his exposed skin as he places a small feathery kiss into her hair.

She wonders if this was good for him. After Nathan had come to talk to her the day before she spent a good hour and a half on her computer researching everything she could about the condition. Based on what Nathan had told her and the reading she had done, if Lucas took his meds then he wouldn't have any problems. He wouldn't be able to play basketball with the same intensity, but he could still play. His life wasn't ending. Brooke only hoped that he realized this too.

"Lucas?" Her voice is small and quiet even though it rips through the silence of the house.

"Yeah?"  
"Can you talk to me about it?"

He freezes for a moment and then exhales. He hasn't spoken about it to anyone. Just listened to the doctor explain everything, and after that he had barely spoken at all over the weekend.

But he wraps his arms around Brooke and pulls her close for a long second. "Okay," he says quietly before releasing her and turning so that they can face each other. He can't say no to her. He can't push her away. Maybe it's because they love each other and he feels as though she won't judge him the slightest bit in all of it. Or maybe it's because without even realizing it, her threat from the other night still lingers in the back of his mind and he's worried that if he pushes her away she won't come back.

So he begins to talk. It surprises him at first how good it feels to let it all out, even if he is self conscious about it all.

He tells her about how empty he feels knowing that he's lost so much of what basketball meant to him; he can't play with the same intensity he always loved and cherished, and second that. He tells her how angry he is with Dan for toying with him and Nathan all summer; risking their lives to try to satisfy his own conscious. He tells her how worried he is that everything will change; that people will look at him differently if they know, that his friends will treat him differently now.

And as he speaks, for the first time since Thursday night when they last saw each other, the silence doesn't seem to take over. The words, though quiet and composed, fill the alarming void that surrounded them the last few days.

And even when there are no words left to say and their left once again in silence. The town and the world still bustles around them but they're left in silence. This time it's okay though, because their being together effortlessly fills it all.

_Today is_

_Oh, Today is_

_Today is quiet in my town_

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!!  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


	17. The Beginning of the End

**Hey everyone!**

**Sorry for the long wait, but school's been kicking my ass lately and I'm not getting much inspiration from the show. I really hope I have some readers and reviewers left out there.**

**Special thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. And a big shout out **Yana** for helping me out with this.**

**I'm a little worried that the second half is rushed, but bear with me, I'm going to go into a lot more depth about what happened in the next chapter. There are only two more chapters and then and epilogue after this. Just a warning....  
**

**The song in this chapter is **"Call it Off" **by **Tegan and Sara**. I forgot last time, but the song was **"Quiet in my Town" **by **Civil Twilight.

**Enjoy**

* * *

It amazed Brooke how much things could change in just a few weeks time.

From leaving New York to getting involved with Lucas. From grieving to letting go of the pain. From a life changing diagnosis to living each day more happily than the last.

Each part of the summer seemed to change her, change them, and change their view of the world.

A lot had changed in the last few weeks, and it seemed to all be for the better.

Dan's relationship with his sons far too damaged for any hope of reconciliation, and while he struggled with that, Nathan and Lucas didn't.

Deb had less than politely kicked Dan out of the house and into the beach house, and Lucas had moved back in with Karen.

Everyone could tell that Dan's actions had deeply affected his sons beyond the physicality of HCM; he lied to them and he risked their lives, and that crept into their hearts and minds and hurt more than they had liked to admit.

So they didn't admit it. They moved on and into new routines.

Now, in the early August heat, when they head to the beach, they drive an extra fifteen minutes down the coast to make sure to stay clear of Dan's new permanent residence.

It's worth the drive though because as the girls lounge beneath an umbrella, they watch their boyfriends destroy some lacrosse players from THH on the volleyball court that was set up in the sand.

She smiled unconsciously when she saw Lucas and Jake throw their heads back in laughter as Nathan lay back in the sand after falling during an ungraceful attempt at stopping a spike.

Those moments of laughter and happiness so genuine seemed to find her more often this summer; more often in these past few weeks.

After the drama from the trip to New York and the HCM revelation, when things started to settle down, there was an unidentifiable shift; everything was going well. Everything was right.

"Yeahhhh!" Lucas guttural victory cry pierced her ears and she refocused on him. He was on his knees leaning back, celebrating their win as if it was a gold medal he had worked his whole life for.

Barely a second after his scream had faded, he began laughing in delight. He clambered to his feet to shake hands with his opponents before he, Nathan and Jake headed back to the shaded area where the three girls lay.

"I'm guessing you won," Peyton deadpanned.

"No, we lost, Luke was just so _thrilled_ about it," Jake rolled his eyes at Lucas who had made his way back onto his knees and dramatically fell beside Brooke.

"You alright?" Brooke smiled warmly. She rested a hand on his stomach and felt a thin layer of sweat make her fingers glide across his skin.

She wondered how good she was at masking the more serious concern in her voice.

"Mmhmm," Lucas closed his eyes for a moment. "Is it just me, or is it hot out here?"

Nathan chuckled deeply from where he was still standing. "Bro, it may have something to do with the fact that we're on a beach in the middle of August."

"Maybe," Lucas shrugged and tried to fight off the grin that wanted to cross his features.

"Speaking of hot," Peyton let Jake pull her up to her feet, "we're going down to the water to cool off. If I sit here any longer I think I may forget how to use my legs."

The remaining four watched them head down to the shoreline for a moment before focusing back on each other.

"Luke man, help me get the second cooler from the car."

"Hmph," he grunted in protest from his spot in the cool sand.

"Get you lazy ass up, man."

"You suck," Lucas muttered as he forced himself back up onto his feet. "Can we just bring back few drinks? Do we really have to carry the whole damn thing over here?"

Nathan rolled his eyes but relented. "Any drink requests?"

"Water, please," Haley smiled up at him.

"Your wish is my command," he put a hand to his chest and bowed slightly as Haley giggled. "Anything for you, princess?" He directed himself towards Brooke.

"Margarita mix," Brooke muttered, increasingly tired of the heat. "We should have brought margarita mix."

"Shoulda, coulda, woulda, B."

"Yeah, whatever. Just water then."

"Two waters comin' up." Lucas said and headed off with Nathan.

"I wouldn't be surprised if those water bottles came back empty," Haley smiled and shook her head. "They way they've been acting lately, I'd expect a full on water fight before they made it back to the sand."

Brooke smiled too. "They've been crazy lately, haven't they?"

"Yep. I think it's August. Lucas always got like this when we were younger. He'd relax most of the summer, and then August first he would start acting like a total child and try to cram in as many stupid summer activities as possible."

"Kind of like he knows that the end of summer is upon us?" Brooke asked; her voiced had lowered noticeably.

"I guess," Haley didn't seem to catch the subtle double meaning. From her place in the sand, propped up on her elbows, her eyes drift to Jake and Peyton messing around by the water. "Whatever it is, I'm not complaining. I haven't seen any of us, especially Nathan and Lucas, this carefree is a long time."

Somewhere behind them Nathan lets out a loud laugh and Haley smiles and turns her head to look over her shoulder.

"Hello ladies," Lucas and Nathan wandered back over. "Jake! Peyton! Come back!"

"Come back? What? What's going on?" Brooke sat up and slipped off her sunglasses, only to wince and slide them back on.

"Well there are no more drinks," Lucas admitted.

"Or snacks for that matter," Nathan added. "Do either of you have a watch?"

"No."

"Well that would explain why no one here realized it was 5:15."

"What?" Brooke and Haley gasped. "We've been out here all day!"  
"Yeah, I know," Jake said as he and Peyton walked back up.

"How did we not realize?" Peyton asked. "The heat usually kills me after like two hours!"

"Maybe it has something to do with the fortress of shade you three crazies built," Lucas insisted.

"And yet here you sit, under the nice cool shade after spending a day out in the hot sunny sun," Brooke teased.

"Says the girl who spent like negative two minutes out in the sun today."

"Hey!" Brooke protested with a playful glare. "I spent plenty of time out in the sun today, thank you very much. I have a nice tan and I would not like to end up like that creepy old lady we saw earlier with the wrinkly leather skin."

"Oh that was gross," Nathan cringed.

"Totally," Brooke nodded and shuddered. "She made me want to run away from the beach before we even got settled."

"Speaking of leaving, I have to go," Haley announced.

"Go?" Peyton asked. "Who said anything about going? I say we stay here until the end of time."  
"I would love to, but I have a quick six to eight shift at the café," Haley sighed.

"So why don't we come back later?" Jake suggested. "We can go home, eat, and restock the snacks; maybe bring back blankets and firewood. We'll make a night out of it."

"Oh that sounds perfect," Brooke smiled and leaned back into Lucas. "Besides I'm all salty from the water. I need to go and rinse off."

"So it's settled," Lucas said confidently. "We'll meet back here at eight thirty. Yeah?"

"Yeah."

They quickly gathered the towels and umbrellas and everything that kept them busy for most of the day and headed back over to their cars.

"I say we stop by the store and get stuff for s'mores," Brooke suggested dreamily as they walked across the hot pavement to the car.

"S'mores?" Lucas asked, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her close. "I think that can be arranged."

"And pie!"  
Lucas laughed heartily. "We can get a pie too. In fact, I think my mom had some apple pies at the café today that were looking _mighty_ fine."

"Perfect."

"Yep," Lucas agreed. "Perfect."

* * *

She had waited, after things had gotten good, for something to go wrong. She had waited while the summer afternoons were spent in perfect bliss and relationships grew. She waited while nearly every little piece of their complicated hearts all came together. She waited for them to fall apart again.

Something had to go wrong, she told herself.

But nothing did.

And eventually she became okay with that. She stopped looking for cracks to stare at and obsess over until they split open in a horrible break.

She started living as though the greatness was normal. She stopped expecting the worst and lived for the best.

But there is a way for things to fall apart with no notice. There is a way that they spin out of control until you have no idea where things went wrong and you're left to try to figure out which way is up because everything in your life seems to have been turned upside down.

And that way comes quietly. It comes inconspicuously and innocently.

"Brooke!" Lucas called as he walked up her front steps. "You have some mail!"  
"Mail?" Brooke questioned as she stepped back from the car where she was gathering all her things. "I don't get mail here." Well, that's not entirely true, she told herself. There was that one really scary moment when the first bill came from when she employed people to fix the house up. But her dad knew where she was by then so she called him and he calmly told her how to take care of everything; by sending him the bill. He would take care of it.

"It looks like you're dad overnight-ed you something."  
"My dad?" Brooke walked up behind him and took the thick FedEx envelope into her hands. "Weird," She shrugged, but her eyebrows remained knit in confusion.

"Well are you going to open it?" Lucas asked as they put their stuff down in the kitchen.

"I guess," Brooke ripped the seal at the top and pulled out its contents. Too many papers came out. She was definitely not looking forward to this, whatever it was.

"What is it?"

_Oh no._ Her head screamed.

"What is it?" Lucas repeated.

"Nothing," her tone was emotionless. It must have been the shock.

"It's clearly not nothing, Brooke. What's going on? Are you okay?"

"It's nothing, just give me a minute." She backed away from him and kept her eyes glued to the small stack of papers she was holding. Some were single sheets, others were packets; all seemed to weigh down on her more than the one before it.

She flipped past the first page, never taking her eyes off the print. Not looking up to Lucas to see his expression; confused, worried, impatient.

She flipped the page again.

"That bastard," she muttered angrily.

With no warning she took a brisk step and grabbed her phone, dialing in numbers quickly and bringing the phone to her ear. The disdain built with each unanswered ring.

"Hello?" Lucas heard a faint deep voice on the other end. The house was quiet and he figured he'd be able to hear the whole conversation just by standing in same room."  
"Hi," The insolence was palpable in her voice.

"Brooke? Is that you?"  
"You…" _fucking asshole!_ her mind screamed, "jerk!"

"Excuse me?"  
"A typed up note? Really? You really think that was the best way to give me this information."

"Brooke," her father sighed on the other end of the line. "I didn't mean it like that. I was in a rush; I needed to get this to you as soon as possible, so I just sent it."

"You could have called."

"I did call, you didn't answer."

"You could have called _again_. And again and again and again until you got in touch with me like a normal person. This was just cold and detached. You don't just screw everything up without saying anything. I thought I at least deserved a warning."

"I'm not screwing anything up, Brooke. You knew this was coming. And your warning was the calendar, or did you not realize that it's August already."

"I realized, thank you," her voice was still sharp and angry. "What I didn't realize is that you…"

"I what?"

"You know I had a fantastic day today?"

"I'm sorry, what?" her father questioned across the line. Brooke's anger seemed to melt into sadness.

"I had a fantastic day. We went to the beach, hung around, forgot about the world for a bit. And then I came home and it was like the grim reaper or something was waiting on my doorstep."

"I'm sorry, Brooke, but you knew it was coming. And please just think about what you said. You forgot about the world? You can't do that. You and I both know all too well that you can't do that."

"I can, and I did. I guess that's the problem though," Brooke closed her eyes as her breaking became shaky. She dropped the papers on the kitchen table and turned towards the sliding glass door in the back.

"I'm sorry," her father's voice was colder.

"Some how I really don't believe that."  
"Oh come on, Brooke. Don't be stubborn for the sake of being stubborn."

"I'm not. To be honest, I think if you could go back and know the way I would react, this would all still happen the same way."

"Don't say that."

"I have to go."

"Brooke—"  
"Bye dad," she held her finger above the hang up button and waited until he whispered "bye" before pressing her thumb down and disconnecting the call.

"Brooke?" Lucas spoke up hesitantly.

"Sorry you had to hear that. Kind of puts a damper on the day, huh?"  
"It's okay," he took a tentative step forward to her. "Are you okay?" He pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. It was still slightly damp from the ocean water he threw her in that afternoon.

"I don't know," she said. "I am," she corrected herself. Things had been going well; this didn't have to ruin anything.

"You sure?"

"Yes," she nodded, thankful that he cared so much but annoyed that he wouldn't let it go. She just wanted to let it go.

"Listen, I'm going to go take a shower, get the salt out of my hair and stuff. You want to meet me at the café for dinner?"

"I can wait," Lucas insisted.

"You really don't have to," Brooke tried to smile reassuringly.

"I want to."  
"You should get cleaned up too, I don't want a stinky boy by my side all night."

"Hey!" Lucas feigned offense. "First of all I don't smell. Second, I really don't think it's worth showing just yet. I have a feeling I may end up with a s'more or two on my face later."

Brooke laughed genuinely and the gentle feeling of happiness took over her body for a moment.

"You sure you can wait?"  
"Positive. I'll watch a baseball game or something."

"Baseball?" Brooke raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"I will pretend to watch a manly thing like baseball and instead will end up watching one of those painfully dimwitted shows you got me into."

Brooke grinned and kissed him lightly. "That's what I thought."

Lucas' eyes darkened and he pulled her close. "Come here," and then his lips were on hers, not letting go until they had to break for air.

"Now go," he shooed her off towards the stairs. "And hurry up, I'm hungry."  
Brooke rolled her eyes but followed the command anyway, unsettled by the sinking feeling that grew in the pit of her stomach with every step she took away from him.

_I won't regret saying this_

_This thing that I'm saying_

_Is it better than keeping my mouth shut_

_That goes without saying_

"Lucas?" she calls out from the top of the stairs, still running her hand through her shinny wet hair to shake out any excess water she can. "Lucas?" she tries again. The TV wasn't on so she makes a left at the bottom of the stairs instead and finds him in the kitchen.

"What are you doing?" Her voice is shocked and laced with horror.

"I'm sorry," are the first words that come out of his mouth. "You were clearly not fine and I was worried and they were sitting out here and I just…looked."

She looked to the table and sees that the neatly stacked pile she had left was now spread out just enough to see the heading of each page.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" her words come out slow and livid.

"I'm s—"

"Sorry, yeah, you mentioned that, but it doesn't answer the fucking question," the slow calmness begins the fade.

"I was worried, okay? I was worried and confused and I wanted to know! I was curious as to why my girlfriend went nuclear on her father and then brushed it off!"

"It's fine, okay? It's nothing I didn't know would happen."

"Brooke, you freaked over a schedule coming in the mail. What is going on?"

"It's nothing, okay?"  
"Stop saying that!" he yells this time. He looks away from her and grabs the piece of paper on the top. It's the note from her dad. "What deal is he talking about, Brooke?"

She bites her lip and looks to the side. Then anger towards him is still there, but an overwhelming sadness seems to take over for a moment.

"What deal, Brooke?"

"The deal," she starts slowly, "that says that when my school schedule comes, I have exactly two weeks before I have to go home. Take away a day for when he had to send this to me, and I have thirteen days left."

"What?"

"This is it. This was the trigger for the end of the summer," realization starts to kick in and her voice gets quieter.

"You can't leave."

"I have to."

"No you don't."

"Yes, I _do_," she looks back up to meet his eyes, confused as to why he doesn't understand. "I have a lot of stuff that I need to start taking care of."

"What are you talking about Brooke?!" he raises his voice again. "It's too early for whatever it is you need to do."

"You're right, it is. That's why I have thirteen days. This is like a warning."

"That's sick, you know that, right?"

"Yep."

_Call, break it off_

_Call, break my own heart_

"Don't leave, Brooke."

"What?" Now it's just pure confusion.

"Don't leave. You don't want to go back, I know you don't."

"Yes, I do, Lucas. And even if I didn't want to go back…I have to."

"You have to go back to what?" His voice becomes spiteful. "To the asshole friends that I met? To parents who you clearly don't have a good relationship with? To the hell that sent you running in the first place. Stay here. This is your home Brooke."

"No it's not, Lucas."

"How can you say that?" He squints in a way she usually finds adorable. Now she doesn't even seem to notice. "Has this meant nothing? I thought you were happy here."

"I _am_ happy here."

"So why do you want to leave?"  
"Because this isn't where I'm supposed to be!"

"Yes it is!" he fights back and grasps for a different approach. The fire he saw flash in her eyes when he insulted the people in New York was an obvious indication to back off. "I love you, Brooke. I know you love me. So stay. We make each other happy, there's no reason to ruin that."

"Lucas, I love you too," she says with a small smile, "but it's not about that." She wishes she could make him understand, but he was even less prepared for this than she was. She knew it would come eventually. He faded into denial as the summer progressed. "You knew I had to leave in the beginning, before this all even started."

"So you're just going to give up? End this?"  
"What the hell are you talking about Lucas? Do you realize how ridiculously hard you're making this? I have time left here."

"But you have to leave."

"Yeah, I do. I have to leave and you knew that from the start. I knew that from the start. We knew that this would happen yet we let _us_ happen anyway. You can't use us as an attempt to keep me here."

"Please, Brooke. Just stay. Stay here with me," he's pleading with her now and he knows how irrational it is. He knows that she's not leaving tomorrow but panic is setting in and he can't help himself. He knows his attempts are in vain too, but he needs to try.

"Lucas, I don't belong here. I've gotten comfortable, but I'm not meant to stay, and if you can see that…if you're really asking me to give up my senior year of a life I've worked so hard to get through, then you don't know me as well as you think you do…as I thought you did."

"I know you better than anyone."

"I really don't think you do."

She's crossed her arms over her chest now and Lucas can see that she doesn't want to fight anymore. She just wants this to go away.

So he goes away.

"Where are you going?" she asks when he starts to back away. Her voice is mostly curiosity, but there's a shred of pain and panic in it that breaks his heart.

How did this happen? They were just happier than they had ever been. They were supposed to go get s'mores and head back to the beach to sit around a nice fire with their friends.

He shouldn't have looked at those papers. He should have left it like Brooke asked. Deep down he knew she would have to leave eventually. He knew that from the start, but he let himself believe that if she loved him enough, she would stay. She would stay as if New York had never existed.

But New York would always exist.

Ignorance is bliss, and he really wishes he could have stayed that way. But now he knows exactly what's to come. Pain. Lonliness.

So he acted irrationally. Yelled. Didn't think. Didn't consider anything important to her.

He shouldn't have look at that note.

"I just need to think."

"_You_ need to think?" As if she didn't.

"Yeah," and then he turns and he's gone.

_Maybe I would have been something you'd be good at_

_Maybe you would have been something I'd be good at_

_But now we'll never know_

_I won't be sad_

_But in case I go there_

_Everyday, to make myself feel bad_

_There's a chance that I'll start to wonder if this was the thing to do_

She knows the second he is out of sight that she should have kept waiting for things to go wrong. She wasn't prepared anymore. They had to go wrong. And pain was what was waiting for her. It came in a small package sitting in front of the door, waiting to rip everything to shreds.

The front door closes behind him and suddenly everything shifts. Her wet hair is now ice cold against her neck and her trembling hands correspond with her beating heart. Lucas presence was some kind of warmth, even when he was angry, and if this is what it's like when he's gone for two seconds, she doesn't want to know what it's going to be like when she actually leaves.

_I'll start to wonder if this was the thing to do_

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please review!!  
**

**-OTHfan326**

**PS- please PM if I'm taking a while to update. I mean it. I welcome the push to get me to post sooner. **


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